issue51[FF小组]第一次作业-by holding

holdingUID: 2285054

TOPIC: ISSUE51 - "Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."

提纲：
1．  教育不可能为个人来设计,因为资源和选拔制度的限制。
2．  如果教育统一了，会不合理。
3．  教育不必要为个人设计，也可以达到effective的效果
4．  教育可以因地制宜，因材施教

Should education be designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student only in which way it can be truly effective? In my view, the idea is not exact enough. Education should be designed to suit the needs of most students, but not just for someone specially. Education designed for each student is not available and not necessary at all. Meanwhile, we should not ignore the students’ interests and needs.

Education could not be projected to serve individual’s needs and interests, which is taken mostly in the schools. In one class, there are many students coming from different backgrounds. They have different races, diversiform habits and hobbies, various interests. If our education wants to meet every student, everyone should has a system of education towards his or her requirement, including teachers and teaching resources, because every one is different. In fact, our funds of education do not have the ability to meet the requirement. In this case, it is difficulty for the government or the higher schools to select the excellent students, because every student has different educational background, it is not fair to judge them though a same way of evaluation. If our education is designed to sever everyone's needs, we can imagine that the system of education will be surely drop into a chaotic situation. So, we can easily draw a conclusion that education can not designed to meet the individual needs and interests of every student.

In additions, education should not be uniform. If education is uniform, some students will learn something which they can not use throughout their lives. If we open a course which is related to sea and ocean, which seems to be very useful to students near sea coast, the students far away from sea will learn it just as a lesson and have no interesting on it. If the education is like that, it can not be called as education, but only a waste of students' time and the fund of education given by government. Therefore, education should be various to suit the different local situations.

Actually, our education is suit to most of the students. Having the best education designers, the government knows better that the students truly need what kind of education and which courses are suit to them. According to the courses and plan of study, the students can gain the achievement in their life. If we design lessons to meet the individual’s interests, the student would not receive good education because of the oversight of himself. The students have lots of things to learn including which knowledge is suit to them and which ones are useful to their further study and work. So they need a leader of their life but not a follower to their interests.

It is admittedly that education various in different cases. This means that education should be designed to suit with the local condition requirement. For example, the education in the area near the sea may has the course of protection and use of sea and seawater desalination（the purity of the sea-water to drinking water）, while it will be a kind of waste if these course are taken in the area without sea, even in the desert. Education should meet the local characteristics and should be designed to make the students have functional abilities in their lives. When education can achieve this gain, it will be a successful system and can be called "truly effective".

To sum up, education is not uniformed which should be various of the specific case. And education must not be specifically designed to meet everyone's needs and interests, in which way education will suffer from difficulty. A truly effective education should be designed to meet the surrounding of the local place and sever the most students' needs.


[ 本帖最后由 holding 于 2008-10-28 23:59 编辑 ]

kirbinUID: 2189137

Should education be designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student only in which way it can be truly effective?(从句离主语太远，Can education be truly effective only by designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student ?) In my view(opinion), the idea is not exact enough. Education should be designed to suit(fit for) the needs of most students, but not just for someone specially(respectively). Education designed for each student is not available and not necessary at all. Meanwhile, we should not ignore the students’ interests and needs.(建议先支持他，admittedly, we should not ..., 然后再is not available)

Education could not be projected to serve individual’s needs and interests, which is taken mostly in the schools.(从句太远 Education  taken mostly in the schools could not be projected to serve individual’s needs and interests.) In one class, there are many students coming from different backgrounds. They have different races, diversiform habits and hobbies, various interests. If our education wants to meet the needs of every student, everyone should has(have) a system of education towards his or her requirement, including teachers and teaching resources, because every one is different. In fact, our funds of education do not have the ability to meet the requirement. In this case, it is difficulty for the government or the higher schools to select the excellent students, because every student has different educational background, it is not fair to judge them though a same way of evaluation. If our education is designed to sever everyone's needs, we can imagine that the system of education will be(去掉) surely drop into a chaotic situation. So, we can easily draw a conclusion that education can not designed to meet the individual needs and interests of every student.

In additions(in addition, 这里应该是转折，而不是进一步，讲的是针对个人), education should not be uniform. If education is uniform, some students will learn something which they can not use throughout their lives. If we open a course which is related to sea and ocean, which seems to be very useful to students near sea coast, the students far away from sea will learn it just as a lesson and have no interesting on(interests in) it. If the education is like that, it can not be called as(an) education, but only a waste of students' time and the fund of education(去掉of education) given by government. Therefore, education should be various to be suitable for the different local situations.

Actually, our education is suitable to most of the students. Having(by) the best education designers, the government knows better (that the students truly need what kind of education and which courses are suit to them改为)what kind of education and coursesthe students truly need. According to the courses and plan of study, the students can gain the achievement in their life. If we design lessons to meet the individual’s interests, the students would not receive good educations because of the oversight(??) of himself. The students have lots of things to learn including which knowledge is suitable to them and which ones are useful to their further study and work.(印象中which在从句里是不能做形容词的，你可能要核实一下，改为what is suitable and  useful to them) So they need a leader of their life but not a follower to their interests.It is admittedly that education various(varies) in different cases. This means that education should be designed to suit(agree) with the local condition(去掉) requirements. For example, the education in the area near the sea may has(have) the course of protection and use of sea, (and 去掉)like seawater desalination（the purity of the sea-water to drinking water）, while it will be a kind of waste if these course are taken in the area without sea(far from ocean), even in the desert. Education should meet the local characteristics and should be designed to make the students have functional abilities in their lives. When education can achieve this gain(goal), it will be a successful system and can be called "truly effective".

To sum up, education is not uniformed which(and) should be (various of)varied in the specific case. And education must not be specifically designed to meet everyone's needs and interests, in which way education will suffer from difficulty. A truly effective education should be designed to meet the surrounding of the local place and sever(serve) the most(most of the) students' needs.



[ 本帖最后由 kirbin 于 2008-10-29 21:11 编辑 ]

叫我浅浅UID: 2414823

是早上改的，现在看到已经有人拍了哈，我主要看了下句子的错误。还是贴上来吧。


Should education be designedto meet the individual needs and interests of each student（和individual重复了）only in which way it can （can it，倒装）be truly effective? In my view, the idea is not exact （用副词，exactly） enough. Education should be designed to suit the needs of most students, but not just for someone specially. Education designed for each student is not available and not necessary at all. Meanwhile, we should not ignore the students’ interests and needs.

（A  good beginning. But it would be better if you change the repeated words another way and be more concise and effective. ）Education could not be projected to serve individual’s needs and interests, which is taken mostly in the schools. In one class, there are many students coming from different backgrounds. They have different races, diversiform habits and hobbies, (and) various interests. If our education wants to meet every student (‘s needs, interests etc. ), everyone should has a system of education towards (according to) his or her requirement, including teachers and teaching resources, (that’s) because every one is different. In fact, our funds of education do not have the ability to meet the requirement. In this case, it is difficulty (use the adj. form of difficulty) for the government or the higher schools (high schools) to select the excellent students ,because every student has different educational background, it is not fair to judge them though a same way of evaluation.(it is not reasonable, in my opinion. )If our education is designed to sever everyone's needs, we can imagine that the system of education will be surely drop into a chaotic situation. So, we can easily draw a conclusion that education can not designed to meet the individual needs and interests of every student.In additions (addition), education should not be uniform. If education is uniform, some students will learn something which they can not use (be used) throughout their lives. If we open a course which is related to sea and ocean, which seems to be very useful to students near sea coast, the students far away from sea will learn it just as a lesson and have no interesting on (in) it. If the education is like that, it can not be called as education, (Chinglish) but only a waste of students' time and the fund of education given by government. Therefore, education should be various to suit the different local situations.Actually, our education is suit to most of the students. Having the best education designers, the government knows better that the students truly need what kind of education and which courses are suit to them. According to the courses and plan ( plans?) of study, the students can gain the achievement in their life. (assertion) If we design lessons to meet the individual’s interests, the student would not receive good education because of the oversight of himself. The students have lots of things to learn including which knowledge is suit to them and which ones are useful to their further study and work. So they need a leader of their life but not a follower to (of) their interests.It is admittedly that education various in different cases. This means that education should be designed to suit with the local condition requirement. For example, the education in the area near the sea may has the course of protection and use of sea and seawater desalination（the purity of the sea-water to drinking water）, while it will be a kind of waste if these course are taken in the area without sea, even in the desert. (another eg. About sea, you are a student living not far from the sea, right? But it is not wise to repeat what you have said, extremely another eg. almost demonstrating exactly the same aspect of your idea.) Education should meet the local characteristics and should be designed to make the students have functional abilities (?) in their lives. When education can achieve this gain, it will (would) be a successful system and can be called "truly effective".To sum up, education is not uniformed which should be various of the specific case. And education must not be specifically designed to meet everyone's needs and interests, in which way education will suffer from difficulty. A truly effective education should be designed to meet the surrounding of the local place and sever the most students' needs.


I thought it would be a well-designed composition at the sight of your outline, which is well-organized. What a pity that you did not fully express or lay out your opinions clearly and concisely.
The Chinese structure is good, but still you should pay more attention to:

1.    The wording. Remember wording is extremely important when your topic or thesis is simple or not quite logically and persuasively.
2.    The sentence structure. Diversity sentence structure beautifies your composition and demonstrates you language quality.
3.    effectiveness. That means you don’t have to repeat one thing on and on. It is boring and ineffective. Actually, in my view, the effectiveness of reasoning comes from a sound logic, which is the most important of a composition.

Sorry for my harsh words, but for your own good, please take it and make progress together with our FF group. We are on the way.

[ 本帖最后由 叫我浅浅 于 2008-10-29 22:33 编辑 ]

kirbinUID: 2189137

我是小组作业要改他的啦