COMEON作文小组------jackallen0714 11月28日作业

jackallen0714UID: 2510951

Every individual has his/her diversified personal working style. Some people feel like to work alone and they claim that it is better enable them concentrate on the work at hand. However, I'd rather prefer to engage myself into a group of people and work together with them.

Working together enable us comprehend and understand the work more profoundly. A single individual's cognition are rather limited. People can only see a fairly small part of the whole picture if they solely rely on their own ways of thinking. Involving in a group of people is always the best choice to emancipate himself from this limitation. Therefore, scientists set up an special panel when dealing with complicated research or intricate study, hoping to get more insightful ideas and opinions to interpret the mysterious scientific world.

Cooperation can also contribute to ease the burden and increase the effeciency. Because when dividing a complex task into distinctive part, everyone is only responsible for their own part. And this different part of work can be done simultaneously. For example, when completing group assignment in school, students choose separate part of the assignment. Maybe you are in charge of collecting information, another student do the following analysing part. Some others at the same time can prepare the essay and the final presentation. In this manner, individuals are effectively organized which can greatly shorten the time of finishing the assignment.

Admittedly, working alone has its own advantages. People have more power of control on the project under processing. However, it also may result in adverse outcomes since less regulation and adjustment will be take into account during the execution. When one is exposed to a group, he/she more or less has to consider other's opinion and accept some of the suggestions provided by group members. These suggestions are of significant meaning for a task to carry out successfully.

In a word, taking into account of all these factors above, I firmly believe that it is better to work with other people than work alone.

jimibtUID: 2560923

抱歉改的晚了，现补上。

Every individual has his/her diversified personal working style. Some people feel like to work alone and they claim that it is better enable them concentrate on the work at hand. However, I'd rather prefer to engage myself into a group of people and work together with them(觉得中心句有些重复，直接改为work together with them).

（Firstly） Working together enable us comprehend and understand the work more profoundly. （Because ）A single individual's cognition are rather limited. (改为,与前一句联系起来)People can only see a fairly small part of the whole picture if they solely rely on their own ways of thinking（觉得solely 与rely on their own重复，建议仅保留一处）. Involving in a group of people is always the best choice to emancipate himself from this limitation. Therefore, scientists set up an special panel when dealing with complicated research or intricate study, hoping to get more insightful ideas and opinions to interpret the mysterious scientific world.（觉得这个detail还是不够specific，具体的人？具体的事？具体的成果？）

Cooperation can also contribute to ease the burden and increase the effeciency(efficiency). Because when dividing a complex task into distinctive（smaller 更形象） part, everyone is only responsible for their own part. And this different part(part用的好多次啊，改为portion,section?) of work can be done simultaneously. For example, when completing group assignment in school, students choose separate part of the assignment. Maybe you are in charge of collecting information, another student do the following analysing(analysis) part. Some others at the same time can prepare the essay and the final presentation. In this manner, individuals are effectively organized which can greatly shorten the time of finishing the assignment.(例子举的比上个好)

Admittedly, working alone has its own advantages. （无连词，两句之间是什么关系呢？改为One advantage is that）People have more power of control on the project under processing. However, it also may result in adverse(negative，似乎没听说过adverse outcome这种说法) outcomes since less regulation and adjustment will be take into account during the execution. When one is exposed to a group, he/she more or less has to consider other's opinion and accept some of the suggestions provided by group members. These suggestions are of(去掉of) significant meaning for a task to carry out successfully.(有例子么？)

In a word, taking into account of all these factors above, I firmly believe that it is better to work with other people than work alone.

整体写的不错，但觉得例子应该更specific,然后需要注重连贯，避免重复。


[ 本帖最后由 jimibt 于 2008-11-30 20:04 编辑 ]