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绿草茵茵UID: 2471736

说研究动物能够学到人类的很多特征：

With the development of sciense and techologies, we have already got many breaks in human
history. For example, computer has taken great advantages in this information times, all wide range of  transportations play an important role in life, numerous successful research on animals make us more health. Definitely, verious methods and instruments make a great contribution for these. Taking the research on human charcaterics as an example, there are large number of achievements through the study of animals.

Human as one of the clearest creatures have lived in the nature for millions of years, we are suffering from the same changes in the uniform environment with the other animals. Facing the global warming, ozone layer destruction and different types of pollution, we usually know little about our changes. However, we could get some useful information by observing changes occurring from animals.

As we known, although people is the clearest creatures, we have the same physical symptoms as the other mammals. For example, we are the warm-blood and mammiferous creature as
well as monkey, cat and cetacean. Unboutedly, orang is the most likeness creature similar to
human. It is these similarities from animals that we could learn about the evolution of human.
Moreover, these similarities as good evidences will support the further scientific research.
In addition, most of the medical progresses come from the animal experiments. As a medical
student, I know rat is one of the best specimens for medical research, especially when develop
a new drug. Sometimes, we also use rabbit or monkey to test the activity of a new drug. New
medicine couldn't be approved without through the animal tests.

In summary, the existed common characters between human and animals, such as the same living environment and the same physical symptoms, making reserch on animals become imperative. On the other hand, it is these studies that we make from animals, bringing breaks in human history. Thereore, we could know about ourselves better.

mpromanusUID: 2565872

With the development of science and techologies, we have already gotten many breakthroughs in human history (歧义。是关于human history的breakthrough还是在历史上已经出现过很多breakthrough? If you mean the latter, it should be '...many breakthroughs throughout THE human history). For example, computers have taken great advantages (又歧义。电脑带来了很多advantage还是电脑占了很多便宜? 如果是前者，应该是compter have brought great advantages) in this information times era, all wide ranges of  transportations play an important role in life, numerous successful researchs on animals make us more healthier (Animal research is not limited to medical researches.). Definitely, various methods and instruments make a great contributions for these. Taking the research on human charcaterics as an example, there are large numbers of achievements in human research? through the study of animals. (You have to answer the actual question: Did animal research help us understand more about humans? 人类研究因动物研究取得进展和动物研究有没有帮助我们更好地理解人类是完全不搭界的两个问题。。)

Human, as one of the clearest (You mean..'most intelligent'?) creatures, have lived in the Nature for millions of years, (跑句run-on sentence. 需要一个合适的连词) we are suffering from the same changes in the uniform environment (What changes? What environment? You have to be specific.) with the other animals. Facing the global warming, ozone layer destruction and different types of pollution, we usually know little about our changes. However, we could get some useful information (about what?) by observing changes occurring from in animals.

As we known, although people is are the clearest creatures, we have the same physical symptoms (You mean 'characteristics'? 'Symptom' means 症状 as in appearances of diseases.) as the other mammals (We don't. What else walks straight like humans do?). For example, we are the warm-blooded and mammiferous creatures as well as monkeys, cats and cetaceans. Unboutedly, orangutan is the most likeness creature most similar to human. It is from these similarities from with animals that we could learn about the evolution of human. (Where does 'evolution' come from? Your arguments didn't mention anything about 'evolution'.)

Moreover, these similarities as good evidences will support the further scientific researches. In addition, most of the medical progresses come from the animal experiments. As a medical student, I know rat is one of the best specimens for medical research, especially when the development of the medicine couldn't be approved without going through the animal tests.(Yes, but what does animal test have to do with 研究动物能学到人类的很多特征? How does animal test enable us to learn anything about human beings? You have to write this out clearly.)

In summary, the existing common characters between humans and animals, such as the same living environment and the same physical symptoms, make researches on animals become imperative. On the other hand, it is from these studies that we make from on animals, we bringing breaks into human history. Therefore, we could know about ourselves better. (How? I don't see how you've arrived at this conclusion. Your points are: animal researches are important; animal researches bring significance to history. Where is 'know about ourselves better' in this picture?)

总结：

你的语言比较不地道，词汇很容易用错，句法比较弱，而且经常有指代不清的状况，需要注意。论点论证方面基本是没有切合题目，打个比喻就是问题问你A，你回答的是和A有点关系的B, C, D，就是没有正面回答A。。请注意议论文的论点要为题目服务，而不是想到一个和题目有点关系的方面就写下来。随时问问自己，我这个论点说明了题目的哪个方面？能让读者了解题目的哪一个方面？如果你自己都不能回答这两个问题，你的读者就更没时间没心思去猜你到底是怎么从看似并不相干的论述得出最后的结论的了。建议多看些好的范文。

绿草茵茵UID: 2471736

非常的感谢！！
我还处于初级阶段，正在努力中。谢谢！