【12月-1月IBT综合备考活动】之【TWE写作】12月15日作业

jackallen0714UID: 2510951

12.15日作业：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Getting advice from older friends is more valuable than getting advice from friends at your age

这个题目在前一个小组写过2次了，这回试试新的写作模式，纯粹实验性质

My nephew is a 12 years old elementary boy who lives close to me. Recently I happened to know that in the next weekend he will have a test on mathematics - his weakest couse. As his uncle, I feel obliged to offer him some guidance and assistance. However, quite opposite to my expectation, he refused to receive my proposal and claim that his friends have already promised to help. He seems pretty willing to seek advices from his peer friends. I remember when I was at his age, it was almost the same: peer friends are the people I turned to when I met with difficulties and people who influence my decisions the most. However, as I grow up, I gradually realized the irreplaceable value of advices from my older friends.

I still remember that afternoon sitting in the high school classroom. Everything seemed quite and peaceful. However, at that very time, I was worrying about what I should major in in the university. That's a big decision I never made ever before, so many choices had dazzled my eyes. After a busy yet vain attempt, I finally decided to ask someone, hoping get some advices from him.

The first name comes to my mind was Vincent, my best friend. I walked straight into his room and told him my troubles and feelings. Unfortunately, he seemed equally, if not more, puzzled about this choice. Therefore, after the small opinion exchange meetings in his bedroom, I became even more confused about my choice, so did Vincent.

After an exhausted afternoon in making choice, I naturally complainned about it in front of my family members. My beloved grandpa, who was an retired teacher, was very interesting to have a talk with me. He analysed the every possibility and the advantages and disadvantages of all the choices, accompany with his personal experience and insightful remarks. After that talk, I suddenly realized what I had been longing for and further understand myself from different angles. Now after four years study in the university, I believe I truely made a proper choice for myself.

What I want to say is this: elder friends have sound personality and more experience than our peer friends. They concern about your situation because they know by themself that even a small choice will cause great change in one's life. They also help us avoid of many doomed failure which are concluded from their own errors made when their were young. Compare with my peers who possess average cognition, little or even no contact with the society, uncertain personality and same problems as I have, it is always hard to find some valuable advices from them. After several failure attempt in my peer frrends, now I never hesitate to ask for advices from my older friends because they are indeed more valuable.


[ 本帖最后由 jackallen0714 于 2008-12-14 20:50 编辑 ]

nickey0809UID: 2349468

如果这组评积极分子，你一定是第一名
觉得你文笔不错原来都练过两轮了啊
仰视

xlwxxyUID: 2568970

很好，以记述的散文方式写。
行文流畅， 两方面都写到了。
值得学习。

chineseladyUID: 2403976

My nephew is a 12 years old elementary boy who lives close to me. Recently I happened to know that in the next weekend he will have a test on mathematics - his weakest couse. As his uncle, I feel obliged to offer him some guidance and assistance. However, quite opposite to my expectation, he refused to receive my proposal and claim 也应该是过去时that his friends have already promised to help. He seems pretty willing to seek advices from his peer friends. I remember when I was at his age, it was almost the same: peer friends are the people I turned to when I met with difficulties and people who influence my decisions the most. However, as I grow up, I gradually realized the irreplaceable value of advices from my older friends.留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IE
I still remember that afternoon sitting in the high school classroom. Everything seemed quite and peaceful. However, at that very time, I was worrying about what I should major in in the university. That's a big decision I never made ever before, so many choices had dazzled my eyes. After a busy yet vain attempt, I finally decided to ask someone, hoping get some advices from him.

first name comes to my mind was Vincent, my best friend. I walked straight into his room and told him my troubles and feelings. Unfortunately, he seemed equally, if not more, puzzled about this choice. Therefore, after the small opinion exchange meetings in his bedroom, I became even more confused about my choice, so did Vincent. After an exhausted afternoon in making choice, I naturally complainned 拼写about it in front of my family members. My beloved grandpa, who was an retired teacher, was very interesting to /interested in have a talk with me. He analysed the every possibility and the advantages and disadvantages of all the choices, accompany with his personal experience and insightful remarks. After that talk, I suddenly realized what I had been longing for and further understand myself from different angles. Now after four years study in the university, I believe I truely made a proper choice for myself.bbs.gter.netUVv­I4fse-t;

What I want to say is this: elder friends have sound personality and more experience than our peer friends. They concern about your situation because they know by themself that even a small choice will cause great change in one's life. They also help us avoid of many doomed failure which are concluded from their own errors made when their were young. Compare with my peers who possess average cognition, little or even no contact with the society, uncertain personality and same problems as I have, it is always hard to find some valuable advices from them. After several failure attempt in my peer frrends, now I never hesitate to ask for advices from my older friends because they are indeed more valuable LZ写的结构紧密值得模仿啊，例子也很恰当。今天晚了不好意思啊！还有30分敲出这么多的字赞

chineseladyUID: 2403976

好了我从发啊 怎么又是这么大:funk:

chineseladyUID: 2403976

My nephew is a 12 years old elementary boy who lives close to me. Recently I happened to know that in the next weekend he will have a test on mathematics - his weakest couse. As his uncle, I feel obliged to offer him some guidance and assistance. However, quite opposite to my expectation, he refused to receive my proposal and claim 也应该是过去时that his friends have already promised to help. He seems pretty willing to seek advices from his peer friends. I remember when I was at his age, it was almost the same: peer friends are the people I turned to when I met with difficulties and people who influence my decisions the most. However, as I grow up, I gradually realized the irreplaceable value of advices from my older friends.留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IE

I still remember that afternoon sitting in the high school classroom. Everything seemed quite and peaceful. However, at that very time, I was worrying about what I should major in in the university. That's a big decision I never made ever before, so many choices had dazzled my eyes. After a busy yet vain attempt, I finally decided to ask someone, hoping get some advices from him.
The first name comes to my mind was Vincent, my best friend. I walked straight into his room and told him my troubles and feelings. Unfortunately, he seemed equally, if not more, puzzled about this choice. Therefore, after the small opinion exchange meetings in his bedroom, I became even more confused about my choice, so did Vincent. After an exhausted afternoon in making choice, I naturally complainned 拼写about it in front of my family members. My beloved grandpa, who was an retired teacher, was very interesting to /interested in have a talk with me. He analysed the every possibility and the advantages and disadvantages of all the choices, accompany with his personal experience and insightful remarks. After that talk, I suddenly realized what I had been longing for and further understand myself from different angles. Now after four years study in the university, I believe I truely made a proper choice for myself.bbs.gter.netUVv­I4fse-t;

What I want to say is this: elder friends have sound personality and more experience than our peer friends. They concern about your situation because they know by themself that even a small choice will cause great change in one's life. They also help us avoid of many doomed failure which are concluded from their own errors made when their  they were young. Compare with my peers who possess average cognition, little or even no contact with the society, uncertain personality and same problems as I have, it is always hard to find some valuable advices from them. After several failure attempt in my peer frrends, now I never hesitate to ask for advices from my older friends because they are indeed more valuable LZ写的结构紧密值得模仿啊，例子也很恰当。今天晚了不好意思啊！还有30分敲出这么多的字赞

james011137UID: 2280989

My nephew is a 12 years old elementary boy who lives close to me. Recently I happened to know that in the next weekend he will have a test on mathematics - his weakest couse. As his uncle, I feel obliged to offer him some guidance and assistance. However, quite opposite to my expectation, he refused to receive my proposal and claim that his friends have already promised to help. He seems pretty willing to seek advices from his peer friends. I remember when I was at his age, it was almost the same: peer friends are the people I turned to when I met with difficulties and people who influence my decisions the most. However, as I grow up, I gradually realized the irreplaceable value of advices from my older friends. 这个开篇很好啊，不过是不是稍显啰嗦，相比下面的发展有头重脚轻之嫌？以上纯属吹毛求疵。。 y }x

I still remember that afternoon sitting in the high school classroom. Everything seemed quite and peaceful. However, at that very time, I was worrying about what I should major in in the university. That's a big decision I never made ever before, so many choices had dazzled my eyes. After a busy yet vain attempt, I finally decided to ask someone, hoping get some advices from him.JN1e;A8_aw
The first name comes to my mind was Vincent, my best friend. I walked straight into his room and told him my troubles and feelings. Unfortunately, he seemed equally, if not more, puzzled about this choice. Therefore, after the small opinion exchange meetings in his bedroom, I became even more confused about my choice, so did Vincent.寄托家园'w,q7IO$U-gg
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After an exhausted afternoon in making choice, I naturally complainned about it in front of my family members. My beloved grandpa, who was an retired teacher, was very interesting to have a talk with me. He analysed the every possibility and the advantages and disadvantages of all the choices, accompany with his personal experience and insightful remarks. After that talk, I suddenly realized what I had been longing for and further understand myself from different angles. Now after four years study in the university, I believe I truely made a proper choice for myself.

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What I want to say is this: elder friends have sound personality and more experience than our peer friends. They concern about your situation because they know by themself that even a small choice will cause great change in one's life. They also help us avoid of many doomed failure which are concluded from their own errors made when their were young. Compare with my peers who possess average cognition, little or even no contact with the society, uncertain personality and same problems as I have, it is always hard to find some valuable advices from them. After several failure attempt in my peer frrends, now I never hesitate to ask for advices from my older friends because they are indeed more valuable.


这个写法很好啊。。。个人经历貌似OG上强调过的~~以个人经历 details展开  很好很好~~~~学习了！能得27-30分我个人认为0s