Argument 48【六人作文小组】第1周第1次作业

sneakerliuUID: 2481691

TOPIC: ARGUMENT48 - The following appeared in a newspaper article published in the country of Corpora.

"Twenty years ago, one half of all citizens in Corpora met the standards for adequate physical fitness as then defined by the national advisory board on physical fitness. Today, the board says that only one quarter of all citizens are adequately fit and suggests that spending too much time using computers may be the reason. But since overall fitness levels are highest in regions of Corpora where levels of computer ownership are also highest, it is clear that using computers has not made citizens less physically fit. Instead, as shown by this year's unusually low expenditures on fitness-related products and services, the recent decline in the economy is most likely the cause, and fitness levels will improve when the economy does."
WORDS: 415          TIME: 上午 12:30:00          DATE: 2009-1-5

The author of this essay avers that it is not the using of computers but a not so good economy makes more people overweighted in Corpora. Seemly reasonable his ratiocination is, however, after carefully scrutiny of his reasons, many are logically flawed yet unconvincing.

To begin with, the author argues that as computers enjoy the most popularity among the most fitness regions, using computers will not worse the physic fitness.  However, the essay does not provide any research between the ownership of computer and the frequency of using computers. The truth might be that people in certain region do not use computers frequently but sell them or net cafes are common in certain regions which explain the high level of computer ownership. As people in those areas do regular sports, there is no doubt that they maintain a better fitness level. It is logically flawed to conclude without any research related to the possible explanations.

Furthermore, even if the fact is that the people in more fitness region do not sale computers or run net cafes but use them individually, it is also very hasty to conclude that using computers does not more our body fitness worse as there is no statistic of the regions last 20-year fitness level. Even though certain regions enjoy better citizens' fitness level, the situation is worse than 20 years before due to the introduction of computers during the period. How can anyone make that conclusion without the study of the real function of computers in certain regions?

Lastly, even if I were to concede that the popularized computers do not accompany with the lower fitness lever, it is also too hasty to conclude the economy as a reason. Apparently, the changing way of thinking affects how people live as more choose not to have sports and eat the junk food. Moreover, no research indicates the economy level 20 years ago. It is entirely possible that the economy was worse at that moment while people maintain better physic fitness. Without the study of lifestyle and economy statistic 20 years ago, we cannot satisfactorily link the lower fitness lever with the recent declined economy.

In sum, to better bolster the essay's view the statistic of fit lever regionally 20 years ago and the fact of how people utilize computers in certain regions where the fitness lever are higher is needed. The economy situation of 20 years ago and the lifestyle of current people are also crucial to this matter.

空即是色UID: 2496914

The author of this essay avers that it is not （the） using （of ）computers but a not so good （depressed)economy makes more people overweighted in Corpora. Seemly reasonable his ratiocination is, however, after carefully scrutiny of his reasons, many of them (many是个adj.)are logically flawed yet unconvincing.

To begin with, the author argues that as computers enjoy the most popularity among the most fitness regions, using computers will not worse the physic fitness.  However, the essay does not provide any research between the ownership of computer and the frequency of using computers. The truth might be that people in certain region do not use computers frequently but sell them or net cafes are common in certain regions which explain the high level of computer ownership. As people in those areas do regular sports, there is no doubt that they maintain a better fitness level. It is logically flawed to conclude without any research related to the possible explanations.

Furthermore, even if the fact is that the people in more fitness region do not sale computers or run net cafes but use them individually, it is also very hasty to conclude that using computers does (do)not more our body fitness worse （这里读不顺啊是do our body fitness worse的意思吧？）as there is no statistic of the regions last 20-year fitness level. Even though certain regions enjoy better citizens' fitness level, the situation is worse than 20 years before due to the introduction of computers during the period. How can anyone make that conclusion without the study of the real function of computers in certain regions?

Lastly, even if I were to concede that the popularized computers do not accompany with the lower fitness lever, it is also too hasty to conclude the economy as a reason. Apparently, the changing way of thinking affects how people live as more choose(choices) not to have sports and eat the junk food (affects how people live in more choices--not just have sports or eat the junk food). Moreover, no research indicates the economy level 20 years ago. It is entirely possible that the economy was worse at that moment while people maintain better physic fitness. Without the study of lifestyle and economy statistic 20 years ago, we cannot satisfactorily link the lower fitness lever with the recent declined economy.

In sum, to better bolster the essay's view the statistic of fit lever regionally 20 years ago and the fact of how people utilize computers in certain regions where the fitness lever are higher is needed. The economy situation of 20 years ago and the lifestyle of current people are also crucial to this matter.

看范文中Argument的关键是多举反例，小M你的反例比较少啊，多加些吧