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[i习作temp] Issue130【六人作文小组】第1周第2次作业 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-1-7 00:14:52 |显示全部楼层
Issue 130
"How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."
提纲:
Position: How children are socialized today indeed determines the orientation and even the destiny of society, but there’s other aspects that influence them. We have learned so much of how to raise children, but not enough.
1. It’s significant/crucial for our society that how children are taught and behavior. It determines the orientation and even the destiny of our society, like abilities of cooperation and communication. However, there lie other aspects that influence them, like their personality/individuality.
2. We have learned so much on how to raise children, but not enough/insufficient.

I have to say that how children are socialized today indeed influence the destiny and orientation of society immensely. And many people are obviously not confident of how to raise children or to teach them sufficiently. But only this one single ingredient is not strong enough to DETERMINE our society, there are many other factors of children may influence our society too. It is a fact that we have acquired much experience sufficient for raising children, but there are still plenty of problems need to be solved which indicates that we have a long way to go.

Compared to the primitive stage of human history, society nowadays is much more complex, more changeful and more like a united village rather than isolated islands, which consequently need modern people to be more compatible and flexible. On the other hand, how people behavior determines the model of our society. As the future host of our society, how children are socialized influences the destiny and orientation of society immensely. Are they have enough ability to cooperate with others? Can they tolerant others' mistakes? All these factors will influence the orientation of society. As a result, it seems quite significant to raise children well. Fortunately, we have gained much experience on how to educate children to be a good social people. Children are taught that they should have their own opinions, they must independent from their parents. So these make up our society as a whole, united village.

However, there are still many flaws in our education system, and there exist other factors or abilities some of which can not be acquired in schools. We have excellent education system and well trained professors. Unfortunately, today's schools put too much emphasis on memorizing facts and theories rather than understanding and innovation. In the classes, the teachers just present the fact of some phenomenon and convey the boring theories to students. Under this condition, students may lose interests of exploring the inner principles of the outer world. As a result, when the young students graduate from schools to society, the society may lose spiritual of innovation. A most obvious example of this is the campus in China. Most students there are tired of preparing for the final exams, consequently they neglect the substantial of study. I think maybe this is why the China society contributes little to the world's science and technology development. Fortunately, China government is making any effort to improve the quality of campus education and the educational system.

Besides, except for how children are socialized, some other factors also contribute to the development of society. Some personal characters like teenagers' ideology, world and value views also influence society. If the young generation do not have right views of the world, they will grow up to be anti-society.

In sum, how the children are socialized indeed influence the society greatly, while some other characters also have tremendous affections. We have gained some experience on how to educate and raise teenagers, while there still has a long way to go.

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发表于 2009-1-7 18:09:25 |显示全部楼层
I have to say that how children are socialized today indeed influence the destiny and orientation of society immensely. And many people are obviously not confident of how to raise children or to teach them sufficiently. But only this one single ingredient is not strong enough to DETERMINE our society, there are many other factors of children may influence our society too. It is a fact that we have acquired much experience sufficient for raising children, but there are still plenty of problems need to be solved which indicates that we have a long way to go.

Compared to the primitive stage of human history, society nowadays is much more complex, more changeful and more like a united village rather than isolated islands, which consequently need modern people to be more compatible and flexible. On the other hand, how people behavior determines the model of our society. 这句不太通啊,缺东西As the future host of our society, how children are socialized influences the destiny and orientation of society immensely. Are(Do) they have enough ability to cooperate with others? Can they tolerant (tolerate) others' mistakes? All these factors will influence the orientation of society. As a result, it seems quite significant to raise children well. Fortunately, we have gained much experience on how to educate children to be a good social people. Children are taught that they should have their own opinions, they must independent from their parents.从自主上怎么转入社会化的,说的不太够啊 So these make up our society as a whole, united village.


However, there are still many flaws in our education system, and there exist other factors or abilities some of which can not be acquired in schools. We have excellent education system and well trained professors. Unfortunately, today's schools put too much emphasis on memorizing facts and theories rather than understanding and innovation. In the classes, the teachers just present the fact of some phenomenon(situation,P是现象的意思) and convey the boring theories to students. Under this condition, students may lose interests of exploring the inner principles of the outer world. As a result, when the young students graduate from schools to society, the society may lose spiritual of innovation. A most obvious example of this is the campus in China. Most students there are tired of preparing for the final exams, consequently they neglect the substantial of study. I think maybe this is why the China society contributes little to the world's science and technology development. Fortunately, China government is making any(some) effort to improve the quality of campus education and the educational system.

Besides, except for how children are socialized, some other factors also contribute to the development of society. Some personal characters like teenagers' ideology, world and value views also influence society. If the young generation do not have right views of the world, they will grow up to be anti-society.

In sum, how the children are socialized indeed influence the society greatly, while some other characters also have tremendous affections. We have gained some experience on how to educate and raise teenagers, while there still has a long way to go.

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发表于 2009-1-7 18:15:49 |显示全部楼层

Issue 130"How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."提纲:Position: How children are socialized today indeed determines the orientation and even the destiny of society, but there’s other aspects that influence them. We have learned so much of how to raise children, but not enough.1. It’s significant/crucial for our society that how children are taught and behavior. It determines the orientation and even the destiny of our society, like abilities of cooperation and communication. However, there lie other aspects that influence them, like their personality/individuality.2. We have learned so much on how to raise children, but not enough/insufficient.I have to say that how children are socialized today indeed influence the destiny and orientation of society immensely. And many people are obviously not confident of how to raise children or to teach them sufficiently. But only this one single ingredient is not strong enough to DETERMINE our society, there are many other factors of children may influence our society too. It is a fact that we have acquired much experience sufficient for raising children, but there are still plenty of problems need to be solved which indicates that we have a long way to go. Compared to the primitive stage of human history, society nowadays is much more complex, more changeful and more like a united village rather than isolated islands, which consequently need modern people to be more compatible and flexible. On the other hand, how people behavior determines the model of our society. As the future host of our society, how children are socialized influences the destiny and orientation of society immensely. Are they have enough ability to cooperate with others? Can they tolerant others' mistakes? All these factors will influence the orientation of society. As a result, it seems quite significant to raise children well. 个人觉得一段只说明一个论点比较好。Fortunately, we have gained much experience on how to educate children to be a good social people. Children are taught that they should have their own opinions, they must independent from their parents. So these make up our society as a whole, united village.However, there are still many flaws in our education system, and there exist other factors or abilities some of which can not be acquired in schools. We have excellent education system and well trained professors. Unfortunately, today's schools put too much emphasis on memorizing facts and theories rather than understanding and innovation. In the classes, the teachers just present the fact of some phenomenon and convey the boring theories to students. Under this condition, students may lose interests of exploring the inner principles of the outer world. As a result, when the young students graduate from schools to society, the society may lose spiritual of innovation. A most obvious example of this is the campus in China. Most students there are tired of preparing for the final exams, consequently they neglect the substantial of study. I think maybe this is why the China society contributes little像这种否定词要慎用,过于绝对容易引起他人的反感,也不利于文章的严谨性。Again why this assertion? to the world's science and technology development. Fortunately, China government is making any effort to improve the quality of campus education and the educational system. Besides, except for how children are socialized, some other factors also contribute to the development of society. Some personal characters like teenagers' ideology, world and value views also influence society. If the young generations do not have right views of the world, they will grow up to be anti-society.In sum, how the children are socialized indeed influence the society greatly, while some other characters also have tremendous affections. We have gained some experience on how to educate and raise teenagers, while there still has a long way to go.

"How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."总结:
文章的语言没有什么太大的问题,对题目也进行了全面的回应。作为现今阶段的习作已经算是质量比较好的啦,如果继续努力的话应该会有更大的进步。
但是个人觉得对于这样的文章怎样写出新意和个人独到的见解是比较难的。还是那句话,想了又想。
其实很喜欢ETSissue作文题,因为它让我们开始思考自己以前从未想过的问题。
仅提出几个问题供大家思考:
What is socialization?
Why does it determine the society? Is it a very basis of our society?
What is Society? What makes it up?
What criteria should we use to determine whether we raise our children well or not?
What is a better society we pursue?
So many questions have remained to be solved. So think this over.

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发表于 2009-1-7 21:56:22 |显示全部楼层
同意老大的意见。这些问题我平时都没认真想过,到真正写的时候往往觉得语言苍白。
学习真是一个积累的过程

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RE: Issue130【六人作文小组】第1周第2次作业 [修改]

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