Dark_Tournament TOEFL-ibt作文小组 第五次作业by lewinsky

lewinskyUID: 2479218

The break-neck speed of innovation, the ersion of traditional values and beliefs, the fickleness of life,and the instability of international relations are all from time to time cited as evidence that technology makes our life simpler.From my point of view, however, the defining and ongoing innovations give rise to numerous problems which make people's lives more complicated as well as benefits it does.
   Admittedly, technological development indeed has brought us a more comvenient life. Currently, an increasing number of people tend to enjoy on-line shopping which free them from commuting among different places, and almost all goods what people want to purchase are readily available at a sound price on the website which result in less time in bargain. Accordingly, technological progress leads to a simpler life for human-being.
   Nevertheless, modern people are suffering from different kinds of mental obstacles which make our relationship among people more complicated.For instance, Internet gives us an opponturnity to keep in touch with our parents frequently when we are far away from them.A myriad of people, on the contrary, are more likely to play games on-line rather than to send a e-mail to their families.In other words, Internet steals our relationship and attention away from family which manifests complex values and beliefs in society.In addition, the whole world is going through Ecnomic Crisis due to the technological development. The complicated relationship among people is a catalyst of collapsing of credit system ,at least to some extent.
   In sum, in spite of the technology has a positive impact on the quality of life, we cannot ignore those undesirable aspects,in the meantime it is up to our whole human-being to apply science technology to reduce complexity in our life.

lewinskyUID: 2479218

怎么没有partner帮忙修改作文。。。。:mad:

偷闲透气UID: 2148172

The break-neck speed of innovation, the ersion （这个词还真不懂）of traditional values and beliefs, the fickleness （查了一下，这个词主要意思的unfaithfulness by virtue of being unreliable or treacherous，请问你这句话是为了说明“科技让人们生活简单的一个例子是生活的浮躁？）of life,and the instability of international relations are all from time to time cited as evidence that technology makes our life simpler.From my point of view, however, the defining and ongoing innovations give rise to numerous problems which make people's lives more complicated as well as benefits it does.

Admittedly, technological development indeed has brought us a more comvenient life. Currently, an increasing number of people tend to enjoy on-line shopping which free them from commuting among different places, and almost all goods what people want to purchase are readily available at a sound price on the website which result in less time in bargain. Accordingly, technological progress leads to a simpler life for human-being.. F& J

# O2 F* S
   Nevertheless, modern people are suffering from different kinds of mental obstacles which make our relationship among people more complicated.For instance, Internet gives us an opponturnity to keep in touch with our parents frequently when we are far away from them.A myriad of people, on the contrary, are more likely to play games on-line rather than to send a e-mail to their families.In other words, Internet steals our relationship and attention away from family which manifests complex values and beliefs in society. In addition, the whole world is going through Ecnomic Crisis due to the technological development. The complicated relationship among people is a catalyst of collapsing of credit system ,at least to some extent。(上句说经济危机是因为科技发展造成的。下句说人们复杂的关系是信用体系瓦解的原因。这跟科技使人们生活复杂有什么逻辑关系。要么你在中间加一句，科技发展比如什么什么造成了人们复杂的关系，（比如金融衍生产品(financial derivative products)的开发、多重借贷(loans)造成人们关系复杂，互相牵连，然后，这些复杂的关系没有被处理好，造成信用体系瓦解，导致了次贷危机和经济危机的发生）

t0 T! ~. [% Z( h
   In sum, in spite of the technology has a positive impact on the quality of life, we cannot ignore those undesirable aspects,in the meantime it is up to our whole human-being to apply science technology to reduce complexity in our life.
楼主的作文用词还不错。。。我个人很喜欢，是为数不多看着不累的文章，而且个人觉得理由如果能再逻辑性一点，就更好啦

lewinskyUID: 2479218

Appreciate your sincerely revise!
   Thanks....

artificialguyUID: 2579142

The break-neck speed of innovation, the ersion(楼主是要说edition?) of traditional values and beliefs, the fickleness of life,and the instability of international relations are all from time to time cited as evidence that technology makes our life simpler.From my point of view, however, the defining(也可用so-called) and ongoing innovations give rise to numerous problems which make people's lives more complicated as well as benefits it does..

Admittedly, technological development indeed has brought us a more convenient life. Currently, an increasing number of people tend to enjoy on-line shopping which free them from commuting among different places, and almost all goods what people want to purchase are readily available at a sound price on the website which result in less time in bargain. Accordingly, technological progress leads to a simpler life for human being.

Nevertheless, modern people are suffering from different kinds of mental obstacles which make our relationship among people more complicated.For instance, Internet gives us an opponturnity to keep in touch with our parents frequently when we are far away from them.A myriad of people, on the contrary, are more likely to play games on-line rather than to send e-mails to their families. In other words, Internet steals our relationship and attention away from family which manifests complex values and beliefs in society. In addition, the whole world is going through Ecnomic Crisis due to the technological development. The complicated relationship among people is a catalyst of collapsing of credit system ,at least to some extent.

In sum, in spite of the technology has a positive impact on the quality of life, we cannot ignore those undesirable aspects,in the meantime it is up to our whole human-being to apply science technology to reduce complexity in our life.

文章挺流畅的，继续加油~
标点符号后别忘了空格~

lewinskyUID: 2479218

the erosion of ......

偷闲透气UID: 2148172

有机会你也来改改我的作文吧，我大概在第48楼。互相学习：）你几月份考？

lewinskyUID: 2479218

恩，这个月最后一天。。。。