TOEFL 4—6月Dark_Tournament写作小组 偷闲透气 第十次作业

偷闲透气UID: 2148172

governments should spend more money in support of arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams

应多钱给体育运动。
理由：1. 体育运动受益范围更广，参与的群众多。
          2. 多钱给体育运动，可以改善、增强国与国人民之前的关系。

I think every Chinese people and most people in other countries know about 2008 Beijing Olympic games held by Chinese government in August, 2008. By holding this Olympic games, Chinese government shows its great efforts and attentions to support of athletics, and also demonstrates the improvement of the body quality of Chinese people and athletes. So, when I am asked whether governments should spend more money in support of arts than in support of athletics, by considering the benefits that I mentioned above, I will definitely choose the athletics. There are also the following reasons.

Firstly, the benefits of supporting athletics are more than that of supporting arts. Every people, if they like to join, can participate in athletics. For example, young people may play basketball, old people may swim or play pingpang ball. All these sports are good for their health. If government spends more money in support of athletics, it will not only bring state honors through sport competitions, for example athletes win Gold medal in the Olympic games, but also make people's body stronger than before. Taking our government for example, there is an official statistic showing that through several years of contributing money to support athletics, China becomes one of dominant sport countries in the world, and the body quality of Chinese people has been improved significantly. However, arts do not have such a wide area of participation by people.

Secondly, many governments and people like to participate in athletics, and if government spends more money to support athletics, the relationship with other countries and foreign people will be improved and become better. We know that the establishment of the diplomatic relationship between U.S government and Chinese government is upon "pingpang ball diplomacy". I can also find that athletics plays an important role in the relationship between countries and governments. By contributing more money to support athletics, for example providing high standard training facilities, more good athletes will like to join in and these athletes' sport level will be highly increased. These excellent athletes may represent Chinese people to win medals and their level of sport will show and represent a country's sport level. When they show their highest level of sports and win the gold medals, other countries and their athletes will respect our athletes and our country. Then, there are more and more foreign athletes willing to come to China for training. Their governments will also encourage athletes to come to China. I believe through frequent athletics communication, the relationship between countries and people will become better than before.

Considering the reasons mentioned above, I think government should pay more money to support athletics.

qing200UID: 2507993

1# 偷闲透气

I think every Chinese people and most people in other countries know about 2008 Beijing Olympic games held by Chinese government in August, 2008. By holding this Olympic games, Chinese government shows its great efforts and attentions to support of athletics, and also demonstrates the improvement of the body quality of Chinese people and athletes. So, when I am asked whether governments should spend more money in support of arts than in support of athletics, by considering the benefits that I mentioned above, I will definitely choose the athletics. (choose和前面的whether 不相符，前面说的是否怎么样？不是两个选一个or)There are also 删the following reasons.
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$ \7 C2 S) f8 ^3 JFirstly, the benefits of supporting athletics are more than that of supporting arts. Every people, if they like to join, can participate in athletics. For example, young people may play basketball, old people may swim or play pingpang ball. All these sports are good for their health. If government spends more money in support of athletics, it will not only bring state honors through sport competitions, for example athletes win Gold medal in the Olympic games, （这个例子似乎有些多余，一方面谁都知道获奖肯定honor没必要举例解释，再者把前后句子弄得不那么连贯了）but also make people's body stronger than before. Taking our government for example, there is an official statistic showing that through several years of contributing （政府贡献钱？似乎不合理investing好些）money to support athletics, China becomes one of dominant sport countries in the world, and the body quality of Chinese people has been improved significantly. However, arts do not have such a wide area of participation by people.
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: V+ p* k9 A1 pSecondly, many governments and people like to participate in athletics, and if government spends more money to support athletics, the relationship with other countries and foreign people will be improved and become better（重复，improve 即better）. We know that the establishment of the diplomatic relationship between U.S government and Chinese government is upon "pingpang ball diplomacy". I can also find that athletics plays an important role in the relationship between countries and governments.（改成plays an important role in maintianing the relationship between china and international countries.) By contributing more money to support athletics, for example providing high standard training facilities, +training more good athletes will like to join in and these athletes' sport level will be highly increased. These excellent athletes may represent Chinese people to win medals and their level of sport will show and represent a country's sport level. When they show their highest level of sports and win the gold medals, other countries and their athletes will respect our athletes and our country. Then, there are more and more foreign athletes willing to come to China for training. Their governments will also encourage athletes to come to China. I believe through frequent athletics communication, the relationship between countries and people will become better than before. " a- P/ Z" C8 G
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Considering the reasons mentioned above, I think government should pay more money to support athletics.

表达不是简洁明了，
有些细节可以去掉，
到secondly就结束了，
我以为我少粘贴过来了，
文章的结构五段式是大家公认的比较好的结构，

那样文章会显得完整些，

构思不错

水龙娃娃UID: 2359238

I think every Chinese people and most people in other countries(有些罗嗦，直接说people all around the world就可以了) know about 2008 Beijing Olympic games held by Chinese government in August, 2008. By holding this Olympic games, Chinese government shows its great efforts and attentions to support of athletics, and also demonstrates the improvement of the body quality of Chinese people and athletes. So, when I am asked whether governments should spend more money in support of arts than in support of athletics, by considering the benefits that I mentioned above, I will definitely choose the athletics. There are also the following reasons.+ V

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Firstly, the benefits of supporting athletics are more than that of supporting arts. Every people, if they like to join, can participate in athletics. For example, young people may play basketball, old people may swim or play pingpang ball. All these sports are good for their health. If （a）government spends more money in support of athletics, it will not only bring state honors through sport competitions, for example athletes win Gold medal in the Olympic games, but also make people's body stronger than before. Taking our government for example, there is an official statistic showing that through several years of contributing money to support athletics, China becomes one of dominant sport countries in the world, and the body quality of Chinese people has been improved significantly. However, arts do not have such a wide area of participation by people.
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Secondly, many governments and people like to participate in athletics, and if government spends more money to support athletics, the relationship with other countries and foreign people will be improved and become better. We know that the establishment of the diplomatic relationship between U.S government and Chinese government is upon "pingpang ball diplomacy". I can also find that athletics plays an important role in the relationship between countries and governments. By contributing more money to support athletics, for example providing high standard training facilities, more good athletes will like to join in and these athletes' sport level will be highly increased. These excellent athletes may represent Chinese people to win medals and their level of sport will show and represent a country's sport level. When they show their highest level of sports and win the gold medals, other countries and their athletes will respect our athletes and our country. Then, there are more and more foreign athletes willing to come to China for training. Their governments will also encourage athletes to come to China. I believe through frequent athletics communication, the relationship between countries and people will become better than before.

Considering the reasons mentioned above, I think government should pay more money to support athletics.

整体来说思路清晰。结尾有些过短。
1.开头有些罗嗦，包括中间叙述论据的时候也是如此，表述的不是很利落。特别是第二段，说理与例子的逻辑顺序有些混乱，可能也是限时的事儿，段落内部的结构还是要练习的更清晰写为好。
2.同义的词汇还需多积累些，比如，提出例子不要重复用for  example。。。。
LZ加油～～:loveliness: