TOEFL 2009上半年-Dark_Tournament写作组笨笨奔奔 第二十九次作业

笨笨奔奔UID：2623534

题目：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Extended family is not as important as it was in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. （09/22/07）
提纲：不同意
   1、大家庭里的每个成员都有不同的经历和经验，这样可以帮助年轻一代进行决策和给他们建议。
  2、当某个家庭成员遇到经济困难时，家庭成员可以给与帮助。
  3、大家庭也有缺点，比如现在竞争激烈了，人们的生活都很忙，平时与每个家庭成员保持联系很花时间。




My grandpa and grandma told me that there were 30 individuals when they were young, and they lived together, and they shared happiness together, and sadly, confronted with the difficulties, and solved the problems. Nowadays, although it seems that relatives like grandparents, cousins, uncles and auntes are more and more distant from a small family, I do not think this phenomenon proves that they are less important than it was in the past. On the contrary, they still play a unique part  in family life.


As the competition of our society becomes more and more fierce, the risk of doing investigation or taking a new job is increasing rapidly, this means making decisions seems so important than ever before. In a big family, people have their own experiences which are very precious to the young generations to make some decisions. For instance, one of my cousins wanted to buy some stocks and he asked my father, who was a stockbroker some years ago, for some advice. With the help of my father, his stocks show an appreciation of 10%.



Another advantage of having a big family is that when a family member has a economic problem, the extended family can support him not only in economic but also in spirit. For example, if my uncle just lost his job at the same time his son need a large number of money to pay the tuition for his university study, the whole family will spare no effort to help this small family to solve the problem.


Admittedly, there are some drawbacks for the extended family. Because of the family big size and everyone's busy life, it will take a lot of time to keep in touch with every small families. While this disadvantage will not hardly conquer if every individuals can comprehend and support each other.


In conclusion, the extended family is still important for every family members. Because they can confront with the difficulties and solve the problems together. As the pace of modern life increase quickly, the relatives can benefit from each other.

jessie18UID：2596971

My grandpa and grandma told me that there were 30 individuals when they were young, and they lived together, and they shared happiness together, and sadly, confronted with the difficulties, and solved the problems.（没见过这种句型，是排比吗） Nowadays, although it seems that relatives like grandparents, cousins, uncles and auntes are more and more distant from a small family, I do not think this phenomenon proves that they are less important than it was in the past. On the contrary, they still play a unique part  in family life.

As the competition of our society becomes more and more fierce, the risk of doing investigation or taking a new job is increasing rapidly, this means making decisions seems so important than ever before. In a big family, people have their own experiences which are very precious to the young generations to make some decisions. For instance, one of my cousins wanted to buy some stocks and he asked my father, who was a stockbroker some years ago, for some advice. With the help of my father, his stocks show an appreciation of 10%.（我感觉托福作文应该首先把观点亮明了，然后在阐述。举完例子后最好在总结一下观点，即重申了观点又总结了例子）

Another advantage of having a big family is that when a family member has a economic problem, the extended family can support him （him or her英文中没指明性别的应该注意全都写出，否则外国人会以为你有性别歧视）not only in economic but also in spirit. For example, if my uncle just lost his job at the same time his son need（needs） a large number of money to pay the tuition for his university study, the whole family will spare no effort to help this small family to solve the problem.（举完例子了有句总结的话比较好）

Admittedly, there are some drawbacks for the extended family. Because of the family（family's） big size and everyone's busy life, it will take a lot of time to keep in touch with every small families. While this disadvantage will not hardly conquer if every individuals can comprehend and support each other.

In conclusion, the extended family is still important for every family members. Because they can confront with the difficulties and solve the problems together. As the pace of modern life increase quickly, the relatives can benefit from each other.
总体感觉lz的文章思路比较清晰，论述到位，值得学习。由于我的水平有限改的不好请lz包涵。
lz加油！祝考试成功！