憋了一个礼拜终于憋出第一篇A，不求批改，但求存档于此，以问心无愧于9.4AW之战

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憋了一个礼拜，痛苦啊，终于憋出第一篇A的拙作，不求批改，但求存档于此，以问心无愧于9.4AW之战

A.53
Thirteen years ago, researchers studied a group of 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice. They discovered that these infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn, a time when their mothers' production of melatonin—a hormone known to affect some brain functions—would naturally increase in response to decreased daylight. In a follow-up study conducted earlier this year, more than half of these children—now teenagers—who had shown signs of distress identified themselves as shy. Clearly, increased levels of melatonin before birth cause shyness during infancy and this shyness continues into later life.

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The argument reaches a conclusion unsafely and unfairly that the amount of melatonin of one mother will lead to the shyness of her infant, continuing into later life of the infant. The author uses a study about 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli thirteen years ago as an evidence to illustrate the conclusion in that these infants conceived when their mothers' production of melatonin naturally increase according to decreased daylight in early autumn. For several reasons I will demonstrate below, the evidence fails to provide adequate support to the conclusion.

First of all, the author's citation of the study fails to substantiate the premise that whether the melatonin will cause the shyness. Without the prerequisite, we cannot readily consider the probability of the factor that shyness caused by melatonin. Although the author provides the definition of the melatonin, a hormone known to affect some brain functions, there exists no obvious relationship between shyness and the hormone. Even if the causation subsists, we have no way to gain the information concerning whether the melatonin affects mothers or infants. Accordingly, the possibilities of shyness arose by melatonin impacting mothers or infants are both rational. The author apparently needs more data to write the argument.

Another problem of the argument is that the study covers a narrow range, with the sample of only 25 infants, hence it is powerless to enlarge the consequence to all the circumstances. Granted that the sample is valid to all the situations, the author must assume that it is the shyness that generates the mild distress. In other words, the mild distress may brought about by other reasons the author doesn't illustrate. For example, the environment of the lab might have something different for infants or the experiment(能不能说实验设计有误？如果可以的话则为万能理由) designed for the test have something mistaken.  Absent proof to support the assumption, the author's broad conclusion in the respect of shyness's influence is dubious in some degree.

In addition, as everyone knows, growth of a child will be impacted by various factors, involving living environment, education, acquired knowledge, friends and so forth. The author ignores the other components, merely focusing on the melatonin. The requirement of evidence must also be attached with the ample details referring to the impact of the melatonin. Whether the influence is permanent, whether the influence is unable to eliminate, whether the melatonin is key element of controlling shyness in brain? Without these details, casual conclusion is ineligible.

To sum up, the author needs more clues to prove the show the inevitable relationship between shyness and hormone. To strenghten the argument, the author must provide forceful evidences to support the effectivity of the study. Apart from the two, clear influence the melatonin impacts should be revealed so that we can readily obtain the accurate result.