issue144 [米国有米］bailamo27第六次作业

bailamo27UID: 2191717

（2006-12-17）
144. "It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.
(艺术家而不是评论家带给了社会一些具有持久价值的东西。
*评论家指的是评价艺术作品的人，例如小说、电影、绘画等。）
Syllabus:
1.       艺术家创造艺术作品，给世界带来精神财富，丰富人们的生活; 两者相辅相承。（are supplement of each other.）
2.       评论家以专业眼光给予评论，（1）使艺术家认识到自己的缺陷，更好的进步；（2）给予艺术家以信心，更好的发挥；
3.       评论家给大众（非专业人士）以指导；
4.       当然，评论也是仁者见仁，智者见智。当不同评论意见发生时，有些时候会因为过多的评论而造成对作品本身的关注削弱，或作品的本质被误解、扭曲，破坏了作品。
5.       总结：虽然，历史最终记住的艺术品的创造者，而非某个评论家。但如果没有评论家对作品的诠释和推广，大众接受不了作品，作品本身的价值也无法体现。从而，也谈不上艺术价值的永恒。所以，艺术品的创造靠艺术家的灵感和才华。评论家的职责是将起诠释以推广。只有两者有机的结合起来，相互作用，才能有永久的作品。
Full text: (time: 18:04---20:00, 630words)
  
It is infinite inspiration and talent makes numerous artists to create boundless works of art, which bring resplendent spirit treasures to the world. These artistic works, such as, novels, films, music, paintings and so forth, add hue to our quotidian life. When adverts to the famous painting “Monanisa”, we’re impossible to resist the temptation to think about Da Vinci; when comes to the splendid writing of the four tragedies, Shakes Beare comes into our brain at once; when refers to the Opera music of “The Phantom of the Opera”, the queen of the opera , Sarah Brightman, is surely the first singer we can retrospect. It is these famous artists who give lasting works and make themselves noted in history, however, it seems there’s any records about critics who give comments on these artistic works. For us, the mass, we obviously remember the former, but not the later. However, this doesn’t mean critics’ efforts should be ignored. They do very significant work, which is supplement to artists’ job. Either of their work should not be departed.

For critics, their work is very important to both artists and the whole society. With their specialty, they give criticism to artistic works. Firstly, their comments are of importance to artists because, to some extent, they serve a different insight about a certain work, which can unfold artist’s faults, consequently, can promote artists to do a better job. Secondly, to some aspect, the similar comments about a particular work, can add confidence to the creator. For example, most film critics praise that Steven Spielberg as one of the most talented and famous directors of the world, Steven himself, have directed lots of wonderful movies one after another, such as, the series movie “Jurassic Park”, “War of the worlds”, “Band of brothers” and so on. In my opinion, behind these great works of Steven, except his own gift and afflatus, the common views of the critics give great promotion and confidence to him. So that, critics act positive effect to encourage and inspire artists’ creations.

Furthermore, in popularize artistic works, critics play a fundamental role. Their advice on some works serves as an intermediate(bridge), connecting the society and the artists, which helps the mass, most of whom are laymen, to comprehend the value of a particular work. They work as a filter, which helps people to save their time and spirits to know what works they should pay more attention. Meanwhile, by using their special knowledge about art, critics can improve the level of aesthetic of the society as a whole. So that more people can understand the works of artists, and make a piece of work or even an artist become lasting in the history.

However, sometimes critics exert negative influence on popularizing the art works. In such circumstances, some critics hold totally different opinions about a certain work, a controversy may consequently arisen, which tends to distract the focus on the work itself, and sometimes the critics may distort or mistaken the essence of the work. Both of these two situations can be very possible to cover a veil to the true value of the work. Sometimes, it can even hurt the artists, and make people confused about the art.

In sum, every coin has two sides, so does the effect of critics. It is truly that artists create resplendent artistic works, and few of critics we can remember. However, without efforts on promoting and popularizing the artists’ work by critics, the mass will not fully understand the essential value of the works of art. Without the affirmation of the most people, a work cannot be lasting. The efforts of artists and critics are interacted each other. Absence of either of them, even a very great artistic work will definitely not last forever.   





[ 本帖最后由 bailamo27 于 2006-12-18 15:06 编辑 ]

laner023UID: 2223653

It is infinite inspiration and talent makes numerous artists to create boundless works of art, which bring resplendent spirit treasures to the world. These artistic works, such as, novels, films, music, paintings and so forth, add hue to our quotidian life. When adverts to the famous painting “Monanisa”, we’re impossible to resist the temptation to think about Da Vinci; when comes to the splendid writing of the four tragedies, Shakes Beare comes into our brain at once; when refers to the Opera music of “The Phantom of the Opera”, the queen of the opera , Sarah Brightman, is surely the first singer we can retrospect.(这段例子很多，但是你这种陈述方式不能为主题服务。因为看到某个艺术家的作品，当然会想起这个艺术家啦，不需要再论述) It is these famous artists who give lasting works and make themselves noted in history, however, it seems there’s any records about critics who give comments on these artistic works. For us, the mass, we obviously remember the former, but not the later. However, this doesn’t mean critics’ efforts should be ignored. They do very significant work, which is supplement to artists’ job. Either of their work should not be departed.

For critics, their work is very important to both artists and the whole society. With their specialty, they give criticism to artistic works. Firstly, their comments are of importance to artists because, to some extent, they serve a different insight about a certain work, which can unfold artist’s faults, consequently, can promote artists to do a better job. Secondly, to some aspect(s), the similar comments about a particular work, can add confidence to the creator. For example, most film critics praise that Steven Spielberg as one of the most talented and famous directors of the world, Steven himself, have directed lots of wonderful movies one after another, such as, the series movie “Jurassic Park”, “War of the worlds”, “Band of brothers” and so on. In my opinion, behind these great works of Steven, except his own gift and afflatus, the common views of the critics give great promotion and confidence to him. So that, critics act positive effect to encourage and inspire artists’ creations.　（分论点没有问题，但是和这段的主题句不符。主题句提到对艺术家及社会的作用，而两个分论点都是针对艺术家的）

Furthermore, in popularize artistic works, critics play a fundamental role. Their advice on some works serves as an intermediate(bridge), connecting the society and the artists, which helps the mass, most of whom are laymen, to comprehend the value of a particular work. They work as a filter, which helps people to save their time and spirits(改成energy会不会好些？) to know what works they should pay more attention. Meanwhile, by using their special knowledge about art, critics can improve the level of aesthetic of the society as a whole. So that more people can understand the works of artists, and make a piece of work or even an artist become lasting in the history（没看懂）.

However, sometimes critics exert negative influence on popularizing the art works. In such circumstances, some critics hold totally different opinions about a certain work, a controversy may consequently arisen, which tends to distract the focus on the work itself, and sometimes the critics may distort or mistaken the essence of the work. Both of these two situations can be very possible to cover a veil to the true value of the work. Sometimes, it can even hurt the artists, and make people confused about the art. （其实这段才是真正需要举例的地方）

In sum, every coin has two sides, so does the effect of critics. It is truly that artists create resplendent artistic works, and few of critics we can remember. However, without efforts on promoting and popularizing the artists’ work by critics, the mass will not fully understand the essential value of the works of art. Without the affirmation of the most people, a work cannot be lasting. The efforts of artists and critics are interacted each other. Absence of either of them, even a very great artistic work will definitely(改成surely？我也不太确定，只觉得definitely不太合适) not last forever.  

总的来说，结构清晰，主题突出，论据充足。
问题是，感觉作者的例子没有用对地方，如第二段关于斯皮尔伯格的例子，他的自信只是来自于你的猜想，我个人认为把猜想用来做论据并不太好；第三段中如果有一些例子的话，文章会更精彩。
如果有改的不对的地方，欢迎讨论。

[ 本帖最后由 laner023 于 2006-12-21 20:11 编辑 ]

bailamo27UID: 2191717

谢谢改我的作文!:)

ernest81888UID: 2247639

这篇难题,我真的很头痛,但发现你的提纲真的很不错哦...加油