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说明：紫色是我觉得用的正点的，红色是我改动的
The speaker asserts that the governmentpriority (priority是n.这样放在动词distrubute前不妥)distribute public resources to support the arts is inappropriate in a society which still exists unemployment, underdevelopment and starvation. In a sense, I tend to agree that art is not a fundamental need of human beings. However, the speaker begs the question by overlooking the essential role of arts and unfairlygives（giving） it a second priority. According to my understanding, both the arts and the fundamental needs are crucial to our society, and an all-sided consideration is requires(required) when deciding the precedence.
Admittedly, arts pales in importance compared to food, clothing, and shelter. The latter requirements are more fundamental. As a result, when it comes to the use of public resources it is entirely inappropriate to dispense a priority to the arts than to the immediate social problems. Consider unemployment, which is one of the most pressing social problems in many nations. Experiences have proved that, a high rate of unemployment would not only bring a large poor population, but also lead to more serious aftermath such as a rising rate of fraud and robbery, economic crisis and even social riot. Accordingly, the government has （governments have，你后面用的是they）heavily duty on these objectives, and they should react quickly and make cogent decisions to solve these problems.
However, to postpone the arts funding until we completely eliminate starvation, underdevelopment, and unemployment would be to delay arts funding forever. Even in the most developed country, poverty and lack of the basic skills still exist. Does this mean that never art should be subsidized by the government? Absolutely not! Arts play a significant role at this period of time. Art is the spiritual power of a nation. It ignites the will to survive, to overcome the temporary obstacles, the solidarity of a nation, and the eagerness to persist. Providing these is definitely more important than to provide them（them 指谁？在这一节里没有出现them的指代项） what they need.
In addition, helping the prosperous of art and solving the social problem are not mutually exclusive in some cases. By allocating public resources to the arts we actually stimulate the development of economic and create more job opportunities and values to the society. An apt illustration of this argument involves Canada’s film industry, which is heavily supported by the government, and which provides countless jobs for film industry workers as a result. The Canadian government also provides amount of（amount of是“总计”的意思,可替换为a variety of ）incentives for American film producers to produce and film the movies in Canada. These incentives have sparked a boom for the Canadian economy and thereby stimulated the public wealth that can be applied toward education, job training and other social projects. The Canadian example is a proof of the well-considered public subsidization can both help solve the essential social problems and spur the blossom of arts.
To sum up, I agree with the speaker insofar as large amount of investigation and financial support in art should firstly satisfies the primarily(primary) requirements of the (去掉the) people in the society(别扭，“大量对艺术的投资和资金援助首先应该满足社会上人们的基本需要”，钱还是在艺术上的，我想这句话与楼主想要表达的应该满足人们的基本需要的基础上来支持艺术的意思是有出入的——楼主是这个意思吧？). However, because of the significances of arts, the governments should heavily subsidize the prosperous of arts. And I also concede that it would be better if government tried to accomplish its duty by spurring the blossom of art and solving the pressing social problems at the same time.
解题上没什么问题，思路很正。
看的出楼主在写之前先学习了一下范文。加油。
部分语言感觉比较“中文”。因为我目前的英文写作也“很中文”（还要严重的“中文”）。所以不好说。改动不多，语言风格上要改的话需要时间。
6:30-8:15P.M | 
发表于 2008-11-2 13:34:30
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