ARGUMENT76 同志们, 饱含被ETS羞辱的来挨砖了!

skaterUID：2116878

In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream and the fact that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequently reported a marked improvemet in the way their skin looked and felt. However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.
Firstly, the study of consumer responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to provides any information that would increase the credibility of the study. The identity of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise. In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But , the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic condition of their skin of the volunteers. Thus, the reader get little idea of the ground about the study at all . The study show nothing use except a means of a advertisement.
Second, the author falsely establishes a causal relationship between the fact that the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess every morning for a month and the report that they gain a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. It is hard to say whether the Luxess really took effect during this period of time. Probably, they get the so-called improvement would attribute to the mild soap they used during this month . After all , no evidence such as a chemical experiment has provides it is the Luxess who took effect in improving. Meanwhile, the author offers no information about the use period nor the appropriate applying time because the volunteers use only at morning and merely for one month. Among the cosmetics, few products would take effect efficiently only in one month. Therefore, sufficient reasons are support the suspect about the causal relationship .
Finally, the author treats the fact that a marked improvement in the way the skin looked and felt as the another fact that Luxess truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. For example, some temporary improvement such as making the skin cleaner, more beautiful or satiny does not equates a whole improvement of the skin which also dependent on some other factors. One could even get some improvement of the skin by take some kinds of physical exercise while the physical condition would also influence the condition of one's skin. So the conclusion based on the reports from the volunteers is ungrounded.
To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the argument maintains. To strengthen the argument the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the volunteers and conductors. To better evaluate this argument, we would need more information regarding the study and the Luxess real effect.

[ Last edited by skater on 2005-7-23 at 22:14 ]

tangjihedeUID：2107695

支持一下。不过没看明白你标题的意思。。。你要砸别人？

In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxessdelete “the” is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated-ing? in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream？请教一下，responses to的意思是说L对这组人有效么？还是中性的意思有反应？ and the fact that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequentlyadv，不是连词 reported a marked improvemetmisspelling in the way their skin looked and felt.建议开头简单一点儿。 However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.
Firstly, the study of consumers’? responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to providess???? any information that would increaseguarantee or warrant?用increase似乎不妥 the credibility of the study. The identitys? of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with thedelete the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise. In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling第一次知道这个词，赞！ conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But however是不是更好？, the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic conditions? of theirthe skin of the volunteers. Thus, the readercan get little idea of the ground about the study at alat all 可以离开not用么？l . The study showshows nothing useuseful except a means of aan advertisement.最后一句话太应，可以加上it is possible that…你也不能断定人家就是做广告
Second,上面改成first。Ly的问题。我建议一律不加ly，一个美国人告诉我的。 the author falsely establishes a causal relationship between the fact that the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess every morning for a month and the report that they gained a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt.换换说法吧，和第一段的表述重复太多。 It is hard to say whether thedelete the,下同。The L face cream, or L. Luxess really took effect during this period of time. Probably, the reason whythey getgot the so-called improvement would attribute to the mild soap they used during this month . After all , no evidence such as a chemical experiment has provides?????????? it is the Luxess whothat took effect in the?我的语感。。。improving. Meanwhile, the author offers no information about the use period请教一下，能这么用么？ nor the appropriate applying time because the volunteers used? it only atin the morning and merely for one month. Among the cosmetics, few products would take effect efficiently only in one month. Therefore, sufficient reasons are supported??????????????? the suspectdoubt 。Suspect是怀疑。。。为是 about the causal relationship .
Finally, the author treats the fact that a marked improvement in the way the skin looked and felt as the another ???????????????????? fact that Luxess truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. For example, some temporary improvement such as making the skin cleaner, more beautiful or satiny does not equates似乎要和with连用 a whole improvement of the skin which isalso dependent on some other factors. One could even get some improvement of the skin by takeing?????????????????? some kinds of physical exercise while the physical condition would also influence the condition of one's skin. So the conclusion based on the reportss? from the volunteers is ungrounded.
To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because whatcited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the argument maintains. To strengthen the argument,? the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the volunteers and conductors前面用的是单数. To better evaluate this argument, we would need more information regarding the study and the Luxess real effect.后两句合并吧。

First,赞一下skater同学用红色标出了结构词以及和上次比表现的进步。
Second，批评skater同学的语法问题。
Third，强烈批评语法问题。
Fourth，我个人比较推荐写arg题采取层层深入的方式，即使。。。。仍然，即使。。。仍然。。。即使。。。仍然。显得更有条理和层次。
Last but not least, 帮我看一下我的同主题：
http://bbs.gter.edu.cn/bbs/viewt ... ge=1&highlight=

[ Last edited by tangjihede on 2005-7-23 at 19:59 ]

翦瞳UID：184872

段段之间，空一行。
In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream and the fact that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequently reported a marked improvemet in the way their skin looked and felt. However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is. (寒假的GRE班吧？像是笔记的东东...开头偏长)

Firstly, the study of consumer responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to provides any information that would increase the credibility of the study. The identity of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise. In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But , the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic condition of their skin of the volunteers. Thus, the reader get little idea of the ground about the study at all . The study show nothing use except a means of a advertisement.（show nothing but a advertisement) [包含太多内容，层次也清楚，看得出搂主很用心]

Second, the author falsely establishes a causal relationship between the fact that the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess every morning for a month[稍微罗嗦了，引用太多] and the report that they gain a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. It is hard to say whether the Luxess really took effect during this period of time. Probably, they get the so-called improvement would attribute to the mild soap they used during this month . After all , no evidence such as a chemical experiment has provides it is the Luxess who took effect in improving. Meanwhile, the author offers no information about the use period nor the appropriate applying time because the volunteers use only at morning and merely for one month. Among the cosmetics, few products would take effect efficiently only in one month. Therefore, sufficient reasons are去掉 support the suspect about the causal relationship .

Finally, the author treats the fact that a marked improvement in the way the skin looked and felt as the another fact that Luxess truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. For example, some temporary improvement such as making the skin cleaner, more beautiful or satiny does not equates a whole improvement of the skin which also dependent on some other factors. One could even get some improvement of the skin by take some kinds of physical exercise while the physical condition would also influence the condition of one's skin. So the conclusion based on the reports from the volunteers is ungrounded.[意思很明白，但句子很胖，就是主观的没有客观标准，攻击这个点吧？]

To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the argument maintains. To strengthen the argument the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the volunteers and conductors. To better evaluate this argument, we would need more information regarding [to confirm] the study and the Luxess real effect.

词，句子结构，都没有什么问题，建议不要引用太多原文。加油啊！

ahqiuUID：207682

In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream and the fact that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequently reported a marked improvemet in the way their skin looked and felt.（可以再简单点，这两个可以写成a test,只要强调结果就够了，我觉得） However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.
Firstly, the study of consumer responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to provides （provide）any information that would increase the credibility of the study. The identity of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise.(不错哦，呵呵) In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But ,（标点不要） the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic condition of their skin of the volunteers. Thus, the reader get little idea of the ground about the study at all . The study show nothing use （useful）except a means of a advertisement.
Second, the author falsely establishes a causal relationship between the fact that the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess every morning for a month and the report that they gain a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. It is hard to say whether the Luxess really took effect during this period of time. Probably, they get the so-called improvement would attribute to the mild soap they used during this month . After all , no evidence such as a chemical experiment has provides （语法错误，而且好像也不是provide, prove好些）it is the Luxess who took effect in improving. Meanwhile, the author offers no information about the use period nor the appropriate applying time because the volunteers use only at morning and merely for one month. Among the cosmetics, few products would take effect efficiently only in one month. Therefore, sufficient reasons are(去掉) support the suspect about the causal relationship .
Finally, the author treats the fact that a marked improvement in the way the skin looked and felt as the（去掉） another fact that Luxess truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. For example, some temporary improvement such as making the skin cleaner, more beautiful or satiny does not equates a whole improvement of the skin which also dependent on some other factors. One could even get some improvement of the skin by take some kinds of physical exercise while the physical condition would also influence the condition of one's skin. So the conclusion based on the reports from the volunteers is ungrounded.（女生果然对化妆品有研究，呵呵）To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the argument maintains. To strengthen the argument the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the volunteers and conductors. To better evaluate this argument, we would need more information regarding the study and the Luxess real effect.
分析的很有道理，整体思路清晰，就是在各个段里的论述稍微理下思路，觉得有点杂乱哦，写太长了，没必要，考试时大概是没有时间来写那么长的（鸡蛋里挑骨头，呵呵）只要列出几种可能性就可以了，结尾的套话好像罗嗦了，呵呵
还有那么长时间才考，就写的那么好了，真是羡慕ing，我也是八月底考，比你还晚，你语言的底子不错啊，呵呵

ahqiuUID：207682

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ;highlight=%2Bahqiu

hustzwjUID：203387

好热闹啊!

hustzwjUID：203387

ARGUMENT76 同志们, 包含被ETS羞辱的来挨砖了!

In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream and the fact (去掉the fact)that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequently reported (reporting) a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.
Firstly, the study of consumer responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to provides any information that would increase the credibility of the study. The identity of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise. In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But , the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic condition of their skin of the volunteers. Thus, the reader get little idea of the ground about the study at all . The study show nothing use except a means of a advertisement.
(关于argument中的a group of people, 可以再添加另外一个重要的点: the author fails to demonstrate that the Luxess could function well on other customers since mostly different customers have totally different facial conditions. That is to say, this product’s effectiveness on the responders might be weakened if these responders’ facial conditions were not typical enough.  )
Second, the author falsely establishes a causal relationship between the fact that the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess every morning for a month and the report that they gain a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. It is hard to say whether the Luxess really took effect during this period of time. Probably, they get the so-called improvement would attribute to the mild soap they used during this month(the so-called improvement they got could be attributed to the mild soap the used during the day) . After all , no evidence such as a chemical experiment has provides it is the Luxess who took effect in improving. Meanwhile, the author offers no information about the use period or the appropriate applying time because the volunteers use it only at morning and lasted merely for one month. Among the cosmetics, few products would take effect efficiently only in one month.
(如果没猜错的话,你是要说: 一个月的zhans暂时有效并不能证明长期的有效.is that right? 不过,感觉你并未点到, for instance: On the other hand, even assuming that the it was the Luxess that improved the condition of the responders’ facial conditions, the one month’s time is not enough to suggest that this product could be effective in the future usage! It is possible that the Luxess only functions well coincidently.) Therefore, sufficient reasons are(delete ‘are’) support the suspect about the causal relationship .
Finally, the author treats the fact that a marked improvement in the way the skin looked and felt as the another fact that Luxess (was) truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. For example(?小问题), some temporary improvement such as making the skin cleaner, more beautiful or satiny does not equates a whole(permanent) improvement(amelioration) of the skin which also dependent on some other factors. One could even get some improvement of the skin by take(taking) some kinds of physical exercise while the physical condition would also influence the condition of one's skin(because the ensuing healthy condition would also influence the condition of one’s skin). So the conclusion based on the reports from the volunteers is ungrounded.
To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the argument maintains. To strengthen the argument the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the volunteers and conductors. To better evaluate this argument, we would need more information regarding the study and the Luxess real effect.

总的说来,没有多少语法错误,需要补充的是argument中的辩论点!

skaterUID：2116878

感谢大家支持,真的!!!三鞠躬!1~2~3 你们知道吗,非常认真的改别人的是飞速进步的基础(AWA写多了...)大家加油!滴水之恩,定涌泉相报!:kiss:

ahqiuUID：207682

Originally posted by skater at 2005-7-23 20:59
你们知道吗,非常认真的改别人的是飞速进步的基础(AWA写多了...)

同感同感，呵呵

skaterUID：2116878

回TANGJIHEDE:
支持一下。不过没看明白你标题的意思。。。你要砸别人？(首先,恩恩, 我说了是来挨砖的,当然我知道大家都想被我用砖头修理)
In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxessdelete “the” is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated-ing? in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream？请教一下，responses to的意思是说L对这组人有效么？还是中性的意思有反应？(原文的话嘛) and the fact that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequentlyadv，不是连词 reported a marked improvemetmisspelling(没有啊??) in the way their skin looked and felt.建议开头简单一点儿。(GOOD SUGGESTION!) However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.
Firstly, the study of consumers’? responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to providess???? any information that would increaseguarantee or warrant?(好,赞)用increase似乎不妥 the credibility of the study. The identitys? of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with thedelete the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise. In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling第一次知道这个词，赞！ conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But however是不是更好？(是), the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic conditions? of theirthe skin of the volunteers. Thus, the readercan get little idea of the ground about the study at alat all 可以离开not用么？l . The study showshows nothing useuseful except a means of aan advertisement.最后一句话太应，可以加上it is possible that…你也不能断定人家就是做广告(对的)

skaterUID：2116878

Second,上面改成first。Ly的问题。我建议一律不加ly，一个美国人告诉我的。(思考良久的问题!) the author falsely establishes a causal relationship between the fact that the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess every morning for a month and the report that they gained a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt.换换说法吧，和第一段的表述重复太多。( I WILL  CONSIDER IT LATER) It is hard to say whether thedelete the,下同。The L face cream, or L. Luxess really took effect during this period of time. Probably, the reason whythey getgot the so-called improvement would attribute to the mild soap they used during this month . After all , no evidence such as a chemical experiment has provides?????????? it is the Luxess whothat took effect in the?我的语感。。。improving. Meanwhile, the author offers no information about the use period请教一下，能这么用么？ (我也不知道,..:L)nor the appropriate applying time because the volunteers used? it only atin the morning and merely for one month. Among the cosmetics, few products would take effect efficiently only in one month. Therefore, sufficient reasons are supported??????????????? the suspectdoubt 。Suspect是怀疑。。。为是 about the causal relationship .
Finally, the author treats the fact that a marked improvement in the way the skin looked and felt as the another ???????????????????? fact that Luxess truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. For example, some temporary improvement such as making the skin cleaner, more beautiful or satiny does not equates似乎要和with连用 a whole improvement of the skin which isalso dependent on some other factors. One could even get some improvement of the skin by takeing?????????????????? some kinds of physical exercise while the physical condition would also influence the condition of one's skin. So the conclusion based on the reportss? from the volunteers is ungrounded.
To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because whatcited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the argument maintains. To strengthen the argument,? the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the volunteers and conductors前面用的是单数. To better evaluate this argument, we would need more information regarding the study and the Luxess real effect.后两句合并吧。

First,赞一下skater同学用红色标出了结构词以及和上次比表现的进步。
Second，批评skater同学的语法问题。
Third，强烈批评语法问题。(厄... 老GF,一点不留情面....:L好吧,下次我要奋发!!)
Fourth，我个人比较推荐写arg题采取层层深入的方式，即使。。。。仍然，即使。。。仍然。。。即使。。。仍然。显得更有条理和层次。(说的对,本人只是还缺少实践,这个FOURTH同样推荐给所有GF!!)

[ Last edited by skater on 2005-7-23 at 22:35 ]

hustzwjUID：203387

提个建议,我觉得对于argument大家应该尽早准备好自己的model,其实argument中错误就那几个,感觉改来改去,再挑不出什么了!(要挑也是语法错误!)
Issue很值得深入讨论,不知几位如何看待这个问题!:confused::confused::confused::victory:

tangjihedeUID：2107695

回TANGJIHEDE:
支持一下。不过没看明白你标题的意思。。。你要砸别人？(首先,恩恩, 我说了是来挨砖的,当然我知道大家都想被我用砖头修理)
In this argument, the author concludes that the Luxessdelete “the” is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin .To support this argument, the author provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated-ing? in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream？请教一下，responses to的意思是说L对这组人有效么？还是中性的意思有反应？(原文的话嘛) 原文的话也不能这么照抄啊。我觉得原文是说一组志愿者参与了L化妆品的试验，你这里是说author为了支持他的论点，提供了“一组志愿者参与了试验”这个论据。能这么说么？“一组志愿者用了都说好”还差不多。and the fact that every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess consequentlyadv，不是连词 reported a marked improvemet misspelling(没有啊??)还嘴硬？拉出去喂狗！ in the way their skin looked and felt.建议开头简单一点儿。(GOOD SUGGESTION!) However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.
Firstly, the study of consumers’? responses to the new product seems meaningless. The author fails to providess???? any information that would increaseguarantee or warrant?(好,赞)用increase似乎不妥 the credibility of the study. The identitys? of the volunteers and conductor of the study as well as their relationship with thedelete the Luxess company are all unknown to the reader. It is doubtful that whether the study is only a means to advertise. In addition, if it is true that the volunteers and the conductor are neutral about the company,  to obtain a telling第一次知道这个词，赞！ conclusion, the quantity and quality are needed based on the statistical method. But however是不是更好？(是), the author does not indicate the information such as the number , the gender , or the basic conditions? of theirthe skin of the volunteers. Thus, the readercan get little idea of the ground about the study at alat all 可以离开not用么？l . The study showshows nothing useuseful except a means of aan advertisement.最后一句话太应，可以加上it is possible that…你也不能断定人家就是做广告(对的)

tangjihedeUID：2107695

赞成zwj的观点。和我一个同学的缩写一模一样：）

hustzwjUID：203387

真的?;P