Issue52 第1篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！

zhangheng1020UID: 2130513

Issue52  第1篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：...:L:L...     520 words
从2005年10月16日11时5分到2005年10月16日11时0分
------题目------
Education encourages students to question and criticize, and therefore does little to promote social harmony.
------正文------
Let's have a look at the definition of "Harmony"__In the dictionary; it said, "Harmony is a pleasing combination of elements in a whole." From this identification, we can say that a "pleasing" and "combinative" society can be called as harmony society. Education encourages one to question and criticize. In the meantime, it gives one the knowledge adapting the society, the ability of thinking and insight. Furthermore, what the education teaches us, is the exactly answer for how to be a "real person" with independent thinking and humanity. And both of those two are the soul of "harmony".

Education can help one society to recognize the combination. Although an uncivilized society can enjoy some pleasure by nature, those educated people can think the "resource" of one's happiness. A society without education can be pleasing, but naturalism can’t protect it’s people from the insight as the character of questing and doubt is based on the human nature. On the day people keep on asking themselves the question such as “who am I?” or “what is the difference between others and me?” those inharmonic elements will exist. Without education, people might find the answer in a wrong direction which might result doubt, distrust, violence and darkness. It is the truth that those encouragements for “question” and “critic” in education might promote harmony, but it will be more dangerous for a society without those sprits. People would easily be lost without awareness, Like a group of blindness in the darkness, those critic can be painful but on another hand, it prevent the lost. In the long term, as a whole society, if the problems can be picked up by the question and criticize, it is the best way to promote social harmony.

Education can also be a path for the meaning of rejoices. As a free will, one can find the meaning of “happiness” without recognize the “independent thinking”, it is also hard to image one can knew what is the meaning of “corporation” without the enlightment of “self_consciousness”. Every concept was identified by its opposite object. We learn “cold” compared with “hot”. We value the pleasure of “team work” when experienced the “isolated struggle”. We learn how to respect each other with judging the others and be judged in the mean time. A social harmony is promoted by this kind of civil education.

What is more, not only “critic” is taught by education. We lean cooperation at the mean time. We were taught in school, collage or lab, with group of people. Most of the education in the world is carried on with partner among the same level. Popularly ideological education believes that people can learn much effective with others of the same aim. And the “commutation skills” is an important part of education since long times ago. Though encouraged questioning and critic, harmony is also stimulated to students in education at the mean time.  

In conclusion, critic is the promotion for the better social development; we learn harmony further by researching the value of independent thinking and education promote the harmony society by encouraging the doubt and association.

zhangheng1020UID: 2130513

我的第一篇文章，写得就一个感觉。
我简直是没有大脑的，不知道有没有小脑......

大家狂拍，我也会同样改大家的文章

[ Last edited by zhangheng1020 on 2005-11-18 at 00:01 ]

esmeirasUID: 202885

我帮你看看, 等下贴给你.

悄悄的告诉你,在此之前从不改别人的处女作...~~~ 是妹妹的俺就认料..~~

esmeirasUID: 202885

Issue52 第1篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！

Issue52  第1篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：...  ...     520 words
从2005年10月16日11时5分到2005年10月16日11时0分
------题目------
Education encourages students to question and criticize, and therefore does little to promote social harmony.
------正文------
Let's have a look at the definition of "Harmony"。( 天，如此随意的开头 ) In the dictionary; it（ is 动词怎么能丢呢） said, "Harmony is a pleasing combination of elements in a whole." From this identification, we can say that a "pleasing" and "combinative" society can be called as harmony society. （无语，不知道算不算循环论证， 如果是就死定了） Education encourages one to question and criticize.（ In the meantime, 错误的用法， meanwhile, at the same time） it gives one the knowledge adapting the society, the ability of thinking and insight. Furthermore, what the education teaches us, is the exactly answer for how to be a "real person" with independent thinking and humanity. And both of those two are the soul of "harmony". （ 不得不说，开头除了连接词表示的结构以外， 句子需要比较大的修改。 请多花时间耐心推敲。 开头的组织很中国式）

（Education can help one society to recognize the combination. 不懂 ） Although an uncivilized society can enjoy some pleasure by nature, those educated people can think the "resource" of one's happiness. A society without education can be pleasing, but naturalism can’t protect it’s people from the insight as the character of questing and doubt is based on the human nature. On the day people keep on asking themselves the question such as “who am I?” or “what is the difference between others and me?” those inharmonic elements will exist. Without education, people might find the answer in a wrong direction which might result doubt, distrust, violence and darkness. It is the truth that those encouragements for “question” and “critic” in education might（ promote 反了吧？？） harmony, but it will be more dangerous for a society without those sprits. People would easily（ be lost 知道你说“没有意识，人们会失落， 但措辞有问题） without awareness, Like a group of blindness in the darkness, those critic can be painful but on another hand, it prevent the lost. In the long term, as a whole society, if the problems can be picked up by the question and criticize, it is the best way to promote social harmony.

Education can also be a path for the meaning of rejoices. As a free will, one can find the meaning of “happiness” without recognize the “independent thinking”, it is also hard to image one can knew what is the meaning of “corporation” without the （enlightment  enlighten?） of “self_(-)consciousness”. Every concept was identified by its opposite object. We learn “cold” compared with “hot”. We value the pleasure of “team work” when experienced the “isolated struggle”. We learn how to respect each other with judging the others and be judged in the mean time. A social harmony is promoted by this kind of civil education.

What is more, not only “critic” is taught by education. We lean cooperation at the mean time. ( 加一句， 这个也会对社会和谐起到促进作用。 要不然感觉少了一句。 考官是带着批判的态度来看你的作文，别指望他/她会顺着你的意思猜) We were taught in school, collage or lab, with group of people. Most of the education in the world is carried on with partner among the same level. Popularly ideological education believes that people can learn much effective with others of the same aim. And the “commutation skills” is an important part of education since long times ago. Though encouraged questioning and critic, harmony is also stimulated to students in education at the mean time.  

In conclusion, critic is the promotion for the better social development; we learn harmony further by researching the value of independent thinking and education promote the harmony society by encouraging the doubt and association.

我拍的很重， 不要介意。 第一篇能写成这样已经不错了。自己反复的修改是提高最快的办法。 我以前也写过这篇。   我作文不是很好，随便参考一下，等下帮你翻出来

esmeirasUID: 202885

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ge=1&highlight=

zhangheng1020UID: 2130513

Originally posted by esmeiras at 2005-11-16 11:58
我帮你看看, 等下贴给你.

悄悄的告诉你,在此之前从不改别人的处女作...~~~ 是妹妹的俺就认料..~~

谢谢的呀，哥哥可要认真看，我写得不好，看完了给你买“宝和丸"暖胃。我这人不怕说的，您随便说。
要是毛病太多，说不过来，就MSN上扔砖头也可以的。
zhangheng1020@hotmai.com

[ Last edited by zhangheng1020 on 2005-11-18 at 00:03 ]

zhangheng1020UID: 2130513

Originally posted by esmeiras at 2005-11-16 12:14
拍的很重， 不要介意。 第一篇能写成这样已经不错了。自己反复的修改是提高最快的办法。 我以前也写过这篇。   我作文不是很好，随便参考一下，等下帮你翻出来  

我觉得您写的很好很好，开头明了，文字也非常优美，
the ability of questioning and criticizing will push him to find the hiding causes and possible solutions of these problems and therefore contribute to the social harmony.That is to say, the ultimate goal for education is to pave the way students to get used to and contribute to the society, and questioning and criticizing is just one of the requirements to achieve that goal.Is questioning and criticizing of students a significant cause of those conflicts?
结构清楚.......
To begin with,...... with the help of which can students dive into the social problems and obtain a perceptive view of the society.
In addition, Education itself does not only require students to question and criticize.
Finally, we might also want to ask: what are the most important causes of social conflict?
In conclusion, from what have been discussed, education is the reason why society is progressing, and questioning and criticizing is the driving force of innovation.
相比之下我很惭愧......

esmeirasUID: 202885

姑娘....~~~表叫我哥哥...~~;P
msn 用不料, 可以google talk  
zhang.esmeiras@gmail.com


忘了罗嗦一句, 好文章的关键在于别人一眼能看出你的论点. 主要分论点应该清晰.  之后再组织论证.   说实话, 后面的感觉写的比开头好些, 但我看了3 遍, 还是很晕.  可能是我敏锐度下降了....~~~~

[ Last edited by esmeiras on 2005-11-16 at 22:08 ]

zhangheng1020UID: 2130513

Originally posted by esmeiras at 2005-11-16 13:00
姑娘....~~~表叫我哥哥...~~;P
msn 用不料, 可以google talk  
zhang.esmeiras@gmail.com


忘了罗嗦一句, 好文章的关键在于别人一眼能看出你的论点. 主要分论点应该清晰.  之后再组织论证.    说实话, 后面的感觉写的比开头好些, 但我看了3 遍, 还是很晕.  可能是我敏锐度下降了....~~~~ ...

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1
这个，说句实话，这篇文章之前我还不是很清楚issue是干什么的.....:L:L:L看了以上的附件自己估摸着就写了，所以惨不认忍睹的......
现在在正在突击学习中
那个鬼谷子大哥的同主题写作，看了更是觉得汗颜...自己把连接里的作文收集起来，挑了20个拍好的砖，慢慢学习。

[ Last edited by zhangheng1020 on 2005-11-18 at 00:11 ]