issue51 (gogogo) 好久没写了，多谢拍砖，有拍必回

neverstopcowUID: 2149686

ISSUE 51 - "Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."

"To rejuvenate our country through science and education" is one of  national policies of our China. Education, which is closely relevant to our country's prosperity, has attracted soaring attention. Therefore, how to design a most effective educational system is what all the educators pursue. Some argues that only meeting the individual needs and interests of each students, education is of most efficiency. I cherish the belief, however, individual interests cannot be the criterion of the education.

No one can deny that interest can be the motive of studying. Interests can keep one's enthusiasm on a certain subject and maintain the curiosity of it, which can push forward one on learning continuously. We may all have the experience that  if you are interested in a certain field, you just want to spend all your time on it and your brain is occupied by it all the time without feeling any tired. However, by contrast, if you are forced to study any discipline, you have more complaint than enthusiasm. The more time you spend on it, the more boring you may feel. Low mood only results in inefficiency. Thereby, I concede that interests play a role in the process of learning.

Nonetheless, the interests of each students can be changeable along with their study. It is partly due to that it is difficult to distinguish whether an individual hold a strong interests or not before deep understanding of certain subject. Some field maybe attractive superficially while one may feel boring as study it further. On the contrary, some subject with an interesting feature if one delves in it may appears insipid. An illuminating example is Copernicus, a well-known astronomer. Copernicus, studied mathematics as his first major for five years, changed to be engaged in medicine and religious laws. Again, after ten years' study, he was fascinated by observation when he witnessed a lunar eclipse and then turned to astronomy. At last, he made great contribution to this field. This example indicates that interests may shift at different stage of a person's life. It is so vulnerable that even a tiny thing can cause a immediate change on it. If we cannot predict when our interests tend to change, how can a so-called education be designed to meet the individual interests?

Moreover, overemphasize on a certain subject may lead to an ignorance of other subjects. An unique interest with an education meeting it only can cause narrowness of one's knowledge. Consider one is fanatic with physics and put all his energy in it. The school designs his curriculum with all the physics classes in order to meet his interests. Then we can imagine such education only can shape a student that is full with physics knowledge but know little about others even unable to express himself properly. Such student parallels to a person with arms but crippled legs, who still cannot walk. This maybe an extreme circumstance, but an inevitable result if too much attention is focused on individual interests.

Generally speaking, interests can indeed stimulate one’s study, but we cannot merely design curriculum only according to students' individual interests. What education should focus on is the students' comprehensive knowledge and development. Consequently, the students should be allowed to contact with all the disciplines. On the fundament of an overall understanding, education can then put more emphasis on developing one’s interests.  
558字

azaleaUID: 196122

先re下 正在看!

chn_senUID: 2179954

哇558字？！
真神人也

chn_senUID: 2179954

原帖由 neverstopcow 于 2006-2-9 23:22 发表
ISSUE 51 - "Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."

"To rejuvenate our country through science and education" is one of  national policies of our China. Education, （出现的中国信号是一件好事么，值得商榷）which is closely relevant to our country's prosperity, has attracted soaring attention. Therefore, how to design a most effective educational system is what all the educators pursue. Some argues that only meeting the individual needs and interests of each students, education is of most efficiency. I cherish the belief, however, individual interests cannot be the criterion of the education.

No one can deny that interest can be the motive of studying. Interests can keep one's enthusiasm on a certain subject and maintain the curiosity of it, which can push forward one on learning continuously. We may all have the experience that  if you are interested in a certain field, you just want to spend all your time on it and your brain is occupied by it all the time without feeling any tired. However, by contrast, if you are forced to study any discipline, you have more complaint than enthusiasm. The more time you spend on it, the more boring you may feel. （这一段略有点口语化，如果在时间紧张的情况下可以考虑略一些，比如正反只说一面）Low mood only（词语有点极端） results in inefficiency. Thereby, I concede that interests play a role in the process of learning.

Nonetheless, the interests of each students can be changeable along with their study. It is partly due to that it is difficult to distinguish whether an individual hold a strong interests or not before deep understanding of certain subject. Some field maybe attractive superficially while one may feel boring as study it further. On the contrary, some subject with an interesting feature if one delves in it may appears insipid. An illuminating example is Copernicus, a well-known astronomer. Copernicus, studied mathematics as his first major for five years, changed to be engaged in medicine and religious laws. Again, after ten years' study, he was fascinated by observation when he witnessed a lunar eclipse and then turned to astronomy. At last, he made great contribution to this field. （好例子）This example indicates that interests may shift at different stage of a person's life. It is so vulnerable that even a tiny thing can cause a immediate change on it. If we cannot predict when our interests tend to change, how can a so-called education be designed to meet the individual interests?

Moreover, overemphasize on a certain subject may lead to an ignorance of other subjects. An unique interest with an education meeting it only can cause narrowness of one's knowledge. Consider one is fanatic with physics and put all his energy in it. The school designs his curriculum with all the physics classes in order to meet his interests. Then we can imagine such education only can shape a student that is full with physics knowledge but know little about others even unable to express himself properly. Such student parallels to a person with arms but crippled legs, who still cannot walk. This maybe an extreme circumstance, but an inevitable result if too much attention is focused on individual interests.

Generally speaking, interests can indeed stimulate one’s study, but we cannot merely design curriculum only according to students' individual interests. What education should focus on is the students' comprehensive knowledge and development. Consequently, the students should be allowed to contact with all the disciplines. On the fundament of an overall understanding, education can then put more emphasis on developing one’s interests.（这是中文的表达方式，不知道英文这样说是否合适。With the overall fundamental principles been given, more emphasis on developing one's interests can be sound.）  

楼主的英语基础扎实啊，语言很流畅的，词汇也相当好！ym一下，呵呵
你什么时候考？

azaleaUID: 196122

"To rejuvenate our country through science and education" is one of  national policies of our China.觉得你下文讲的是世界适用的 觉得没必要在开头提到中国 第一段直入主题比较好 Education, which is closely relevant to our country's prosperity, has attracted soaring attention. Therefore, how to design a most effective educational system is what all the educators pursue. Some arguesargue that only meeting the individual needs and interests of each students, education is of most efficiency.I cherish the belief, however, 加个fulfilment of吧? 不然意思不大明确 individual interests cannot be the criterion of the education.

No one can deny that interest can be the motive of studying. Interests can keep one's enthusiasm on a certain subject and maintain the curiosity of it, which can push forward one on learning continuously. We may all have the experience that  if you are interested in a certain field, you just want to spend all your time on it and your brain is occupied by it all the time without feeling any tiredtired不能用any修饰吧?. However, by contrast, if you are forced to study any discipline, you have more complaint than enthusiasm. The more time you spend on it, the more boring you may feel. Low mood only results in inefficiency. Thereby, I concede that interests play a role in the process of learning.

Nonetheless, the interests of each students can be changeable along with their study. It is partly due to that it is difficult to distinguish whether an individual hold a strong interests or not before deep understanding of certain subject. Some field maybe attractive superficially while one may feel boring as study it further. On the contrary, some subject with an interesting feature if one delves in it may appears insipid. An illuminating example is Copernicus, a well-known astronomer. Copernicus, studied mathematics as his first major for five years, changed to be engaged in medicine and religious laws. Again, after ten years' study, he was fascinated by observation when he witnessed a lunar eclipse and then turned to astronomy. At last, he made great contribution to this field. This example indicates that interests may shift at different stage-s of a person's life. It is so vulnerable that even a tiny thing can cause aan immediate change on it. If we cannot predict when our interests tend to change, how can a so-called education be designed to meet the individual interests?

Moreover, overemphasize名词 overemphasis on a certain subject may lead to an ignorance of other subjects. An unique interest with an education meeting it不需要it吧 only can cause narrowness of one's knowledge. Consider one is fanatic with physics and put all his energy in it. The school designs his curriculum with all the physics classes in order to meet his interests. Then we can imagine such education only can shape a student that is full with physics knowledge but know little about others even unable to express himself properly. Such student parallels to a person with arms but crippled legs, who still cannot walk. This maybemay be an extreme circumstance, but an inevitable result if too much attention is focused on individual interests.

Generally speaking, interests can indeed stimulate one’s study, but we cannot merely design curriculum only according to students' individual interests. What education should focus on is the students' comprehensive knowledge and development. Consequently, the students should be allowed to contact with all the disciplines. On the fundament of an overall understanding, education can then put more emphasis on developing one’s interests.

结构满清晰的 不过主题句写得不够吸引人 因为考官主要看主题句的 最好能花点心思写得精彩点 用些复杂句式
然后就是开头 我觉得对你的观点应该写的稍微详细 就是说写成教育不能完全从兴趣出发 因为A &B 几天不看 都不知道英语怎么表达了!
还有一点 觉得你论述深度不够 只谈到兴趣不能持久 但对整个教育,宏观来讲 有什么影响 还可以考虑教育的目的(老掉牙的话题呵呵) 还有其他因素比如用于教育的经费有限 即使培养兴趣有好处也不能完全满足 etc

[ 本帖最后由 azalea 于 2006-2-11 00:01 编辑 ]

neverstopcowUID: 2149686

回四楼：我3月15号就考了，现在都还没底。多谢chn-sen的砖头！这个，文章中是不是和出现中国我也不太清楚，不过我后来想了想，还是不要太明显好了

谢谢azalea的砖头哦，你现在还在准备提纲吗？还在准备的话就在提纲贴里多提点意见吧，我觉得我越来越不回写提纲了

azaleaUID: 196122

哦 我这2天没看题库了 而且我只是看了题目想一下 大概想几点 都没写出来!
觉得看提纲 提不出什么意见哦.. 我现在去看看

加一UID: 2168628

人们通过兴趣去寻找教育,同时教育也能影响人们的兴趣,毕竟教育也有指引人们兴趣的作用.突出教育和兴趣的互动感觉会比较好.

azaleaUID: 196122

恩! 很新颖的思路
没想到这个!

不过具体这个角度怎么展开呢? 觉得比较难写

cindy1221UID: 2170268

"To rejuvenate our country through science and education" is one of  national policies of our China. Education, which is closely relevant to our country's prosperity, has attracted soaring attention. Therefore, how to design a most effective educational system is what all the educators pursue. Some argues that only meeting （语法错误，应为that only meet)the individual needs and interests of each students, education is of most efficiency. I cherish the belief, however, individual interests cannot be the criterion of the education.

No one can deny that interest can be the motive of studying. Interests can keep one's enthusiasm on a certain subject and maintain the curiosity of it, which can push forward one on learning continuously. We may all have the experience that  if you are interested in a certain field, you just want to spend all your time on it and your brain is occupied by it all the time without feeling any tired. However, by contrast, (这两个可以连用吗？）if you are forced to study any discipline, you have more complaint than enthusiasm. The more time you spend on it, the more boring you may feel. Low mood only results in inefficiency. Thereby, I concede that interests play a role in the process of learning.

Nonetheless, the interests of each students can be changeable along with their study. It is partly due to that it is difficult to distinguish whether an individual hold a strong interests or not before deep understanding of certain subject. Some field maybe attractive superficially while one may feel boring as study it further. On the contrary, some subject with an interesting feature if one delves in it may appears insipid. An illuminating example is Copernicus, a well-known astronomer. Copernicus, studied mathematics as his first major for five years, changed to be engaged in medicine and religious laws. Again, after ten years' study, he was fascinated by observation when he witnessed a lunar eclipse and then turned to astronomy. At last, he made great contribution to this field. This example indicates that interests may shift at different stage of a person's life. It is so vulnerable that even a tiny thing can cause a immediate change on it. If we cannot predict when our interests tend to change, how can a so-called education be designed to meet the individual interests?

Moreover, overemphasize on a certain subject may lead to an ignorance of other subjects. An unique interest with an education meeting it only can cause narrowness of one's knowledge（这句话有点不通？）. Consider one is fanatic with physics and put all his energy in it. The school designs his curriculum with all the physics classes in order to meet his interests. Then we can imagine such education only can shape a student that is full with physics knowledge but know（可能应为knows?) little about others even unable to express himself properly. Such student parallels to a person with arms but crippled legs, who still cannot walk. This maybe an extreme circumstance, but an inevitable result if too much attention is focused on individual interests.

Generally speaking, interests can indeed stimulate one’s study, but we cannot merely design curriculum only according to students' individual interests. What education should focus on is the students' comprehensive knowledge and development. Consequently, the students should be allowed to contact with all the disciplines. On the fundament of an overall understanding, education can then put more emphasis on developing one’s interests.  

总的来说，这篇作文不错的，结构挺好，只是有些句子不太通顺，另外用词很深，很多看不懂。。。你也替我拍拍吧，我现在越写越写不下去了，55555。
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