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[i习作temp] Issue121 FLY AW作文组第六次作业(409字) [复制链接]

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发表于 2006-5-30 08:25:12 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
感觉不是有什么话好说呢。。

Issue121  第7篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧!
------摘要------
作者:寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间:48分35秒     409 words
从2006年4月30日7时15分到2006年4月30日8时45分
------题目------
At various times in the geological past, many species have become extinct as a result of natural, rather than human, processes. Thus, there is no justification for society to make extraordinary efforts, especially at a great cost in money and jobs, to save endangered species.
------正文------
The statement illustrates that many species have become extinct as a result of natural, rather than human, processes in the geological past, which is a piece of fact proved by modern science. As a result, it states that there is no justification for human beings to make extraordinary efforts to save endangered species, which is rather misleading than reasonable. Currently, saving endangered species is not only a sort of responsibility, but also a necessary effort to maintain survival, for human society.

First of all, though many species in the geological past have become extinct due to natural processes, in modern society, much more species have been disappearing as a result of human activities. Through land using, agricultural production, industrial processes, and other social activities, human beings have been robbing, polluting, and confusing the homeland of numerous species. According to scientific studies, thousands of species become extinct each year, and this speed is much faster than that of any other geological times. It is human beings rather than natural processes that have induced this situation, and therefore they cannot escape from their responsibility to protect endangered species.

Besides, saving endangered species is far beyond a kind of responsibility, but relates to human survival. As what has been discussed, in modern society, various species become extinct artificially rather than naturally. In other words, this process goes far away from natural evolvement. Because of the complexity of nature, the following changes are not easily predictable. The disappearance of a single species can cause unimaginable suffering to the whole ecosystem. Like a stone dropped into a lake, the influence caused by the extinction of one species will impact severely on its related species, and will then reach much more species. Though human beings are able to leave on this beautiful planet, no one knows what will happen when numerous species have been killed, when ecosystem has been destroyed, and when this planet is not beautiful any more. Thus, in order to ensure the survival of modern human beings and their future generations, endangered species must be protected.

In conclusion, in modern society, many species have been disappearing as a result of human, rather than natural, processes, which is unlike what has happened in the long geological past. Hence protecting endangered species is a responsibility which cannot be refused by human beings. Moreover, human beings have to save these species in order to maintain the natural evolvement of ecosystem, otherwise they cannot guarantee their following security.
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沙发
发表于 2006-5-30 15:39:50 |只看该作者
夜一的论述真是没的说
条理也很清晰,要好好学习啊
要是有时间剩余的话再写一些会更好

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板凳
发表于 2006-5-30 17:01:22 |只看该作者
估计夜一是被日语考试搞的没思路了 呵呵 写这么少哈...
不过就仅论述的两点还是很值得学习滴。

PS:关于ISSUE的开头有没有model或者什么推荐一下 俺现在开头无门。。。

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地板
发表于 2006-5-30 21:07:00 |只看该作者
我现在的开头一般就是引用下原踢中的话
然后再来个转折,或者让步,,再说出自己的想法

这个是最简单不过了,不用耗太多时间在上面.

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发表于 2006-5-30 23:03:36 |只看该作者
开头么?
一般就是把原题换个方式简略的复述一遍,如果赞成的话就说是个已经被证明的事实,如果反对的话就用however,或者直接说misleading或者unreasonable
像这篇题目,赞成前一句,反对后一句,可以明显看到这种套路吧。。

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发表于 2006-5-30 23:42:04 |只看该作者
也是...主要是自己想太多了,想改怎么修饰一下比较好...
最简单的还是最好的:)

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发表于 2006-5-31 01:38:20 |只看该作者
就是对science这方面的文章有些头疼
关于开头,孙远的四种思路我都试过了:
1、背景描述+论点
2、stateing conflicting views+position
3、question+postion
4、position+main reasons开门见山

灵活选用吧

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RE: Issue121 FLY AW作文组第六次作业(409字) [修改]

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Issue121 FLY AW作文组第六次作业(409字)
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-471121-1-1.html
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