arguement38 义无反顾小组第十七次作业

kittywen_16UID: 2135347

TOPIC: ARGUMENT38 - The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.

"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."
我们注意到一种保证可以显著减少学校和工作岗位的缺席的革新疗法。一项研究报告说在附近的East Meria，鱼的消费量很高，那里的人们每年因为治感冒而去看医生的次数只有一或两次。显然，吃较大量的鱼可以预防感冒。由于感冒是学校和单位缺席的最常见原因，我们建议每天服用Ichthaid，一种从鱼油中提炼的营养物质，作为预防感冒和减少缺席率的有效措施。
WORDS: 271          TIME: 上午 12:30:00          DATE: 2006-6-1

（1）没有提供充分信息证明吃鱼能防止感冒：首先，一年只去一两次医院不代表只得一两次感冒，可能有些人在家买药不去医院；其次，当地人是否还采取其他方式预防感冒；
（2)该研究结果是否适用于西部不得而知；
（3）即使研究结果适用，该物质从鱼油中提炼是否仍然有效作者没有证明；
（4）不能排除人们以感冒作为迟到的借口




In the memo, the arguer recommends the daily use of Ichthaid as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeims. To support his conclusion, he cited a study reports of the East Meria. Plausible as the argument seems at first glance, there some flaws to be questioned after we have close examination.

Firstly, the author fails to offer sufficient evidence to establish a causal relationship between the fish consumption and the increaing immunity from cold. On the one hand, the mere fact that the people in EM visit the doctor once or twice per year does not mean they only catch cold once or twice a year.It highly possible that many people who are catching cold  would rather take medicine at home than going to hospital for high remedy cost. On the other hand, we are not informed whether the local people use other meatures to prevent cold virus.If they concern more about their health so as to do enough exercises daily,they are unlikly to be suffered from cold. Without ruling out these possibilities, we can not justifiably accept the author's conclusion.

Even if eating fish is good for preventing the cold, the author does not provide enough evidence to substantiate this experience still works in West Meria. We have little information about the two areas. Are the climate patterns in these two area similar? What is consisited of their population? If there are huge difference between them, the result of the study can not be applied to the west regardless of obvious perfermance in the east.

Admittedly,  the study of the east is reasonable and can be popularized, we are not sure whether Ichthaid has the same effect.Sofaras it is a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, we have good reason to doubt whether the crital gerdient is still remained. Neither the author explains which  gredient in the fish might take this affection,nor does he guarantee Icthaid contains this gredient.Unless the arguor can sweep out all the questioned analysised above, can he convinces us his conclusion.

Last but not least, the arguer draws his conlusion on a groundless assumption that if people won't catch cold, they will not be late any more since colds are the most frequent reason given for absence from school and work. However, common sense tells us, people usually use cold as an excuse for their absenteeism. It does not necessarily true, but we can not exclude this possiblity. Consequently, the author's proposal is somewhat immature to be acceptable.   

In sum, if author aims to solve the lower absenteeism, he should investegate the real reason for which peole are late. Furthemore, deep reaseach is needed befor we take Ichthaid daily as a remedy from cold.

[ 本帖最后由 kittywen_16 于 2006-6-1 19:17 编辑 ]

yuviUID: 2169411

提綱：
1．        質疑研究的聯係：
a)        吃魚本身與感冒無直接聯係。
b)        因爲感冒看醫生少≠感冒的實際人數少
2．        調查的區域性：
a)        EM所在地區
b)        居民本身的身体素质
3．        質疑Ichthaid 與感冒的聯係
4．        缺席的因素與感冒的關聯

In this newsletter, the author claims that to use a kind of nutritional supplement - Ichthaid to prevent colds and therefore could lower the absenteeism in schools and workplaces. To support this contention, the author provides a study reports in East Meria and mentions that people who consume fish a lot are less likely to see the doctor for the treatment of colds. However, after a carefully examine, I find the argument unpersuasive for the following reasons:

First of all, the study provides from the author that fails to indicate the direct relationship with the cold and fish consumption. On one hand, in the argument the author does not explain the conclusion that fish consumption could be possible to prevent cold. By simply putting these two things together, the author has hastily generalized the conclusion of that. And it is very likely that there is a coincidence for the high consuming rates of the fish and the low numbers of people who went to see the doctor for the treatment of colds per year. On the other hand, the author absents to consider that people visit doctor in a low rates, does not mean that the real situation of cold is keep in a low rate as well. Perhaps that the numbers of the clinic in East Meria is pretty low and therefore cause a low rate in average. And the residents of East Meria might prefer to have some medicals at home rather than to visit the doctor while a cold happens. In short, without the considerations of these and other possibilities, the author's contention that totally based on the study cannot be stand as it claims.

In the second place, the author only focuses on the case that happens in a particular area, and with absence in the regional discrimination. For example, East Meria is probably located in the temperate zone, and in this sense cold is not a widely case happened in people's daily life. And another possibility is the residents in East Meria do have good health conditions in a general speaking, and colds are therefore less occurring in this area than others. Lacking the evidence that people in East Meria who eat fish a lot and do have some relationships with their health conditions, the author's argument that eating a substantial amount fish can prevent colds is unjustified.

Thirdly, even assuming that eating fish could be able to prevent colds in somehow, there is no evidence shows that Ichthaid could work efficacious to prevent colds as well. On one hand, the author does not provide anything about the evidence that be able to indicate the efficiency of Ichthaid, and therefore he cannot hastily asserts that this nutritional supplement derived from fish oil helps the way to prevent colds. And on another hand, the author also absents to consider other supplements from fish and might be work with much more efficacious than Ichthaid could be. Therefore, lacks the evidence that Ichthaid is really helpful with the way to prevent colds, the author's argument is fallacious, at least without evidence to support it.

Finally, even assuming that Ichthaid could be able to help with the treatment of colds, the author fails to conclude that the absenteeism of schools and workplaces can be reduced significantly with a promise. Common sense informs us that only to focus on lower the causes of cold will not good enough to help the reasons for other kinds of absenteeism. Such as the compassionate leaves or other sick leaves. Moreover, colds are the most frequently reasons to give for the absence, and that possibly might be cold is the most common reason for sick to ask a casual leave. Therefore, without the considerations of these causes, the author cannot to ensure that the absenteeism rate could be lower by simply using Ichthaid.

In sum, the author's argument about the Ichthaid to prevent cold and then lower absenteeism is unpersuasive as it stands. To bolster it, we need to know more about the fish consumption and cold prevention, and whether it is a specialized occurrence in East Meria. Further, the author also needs to show the efficiency of Ichthaid works as same as the nutrition getting directly from the fish. And finally, provides survey in order to ensure that the decrease of the causes of cold that could be a weight reason to lower absenteeism.

(731 words)


真搞不懂怎么我现在一开始写argument就变得很罗嗦．．＞．＜～～
写完之后才觉得第２点是根本不必要出现的，（考场上肯定也不允许我写那么多的）

yuviUID: 2169411

原帖由 kittywen_16 于 2006-6-1 19:15 发表
（2)该研究结果是否适用于西部不得而知；

kitty：ＥＡＳＴ　ＭＥＲＩＡ只是那个地区的名字．不见得它就是在东部啊．．

glxingUID: 2156425

提纲：
1，不能证明吃鱼对感冒的作用
2，即使有作用，Ichthaid 可能 没有吃鱼的功效
3，旷工是不是由感冒引起的，值得怀疑。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT38 - The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.

"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."


In this memo, the author recommed the daily use of Ichthaid to lower absenteeism. The author's line of reasoning is that most absences are caused by coldes while the consumption of fish is useful to prevent colds. To support the tatement, the author cites a study as evidences. However, close scrutiny of this memo reveals that the author has made several mistakes.   

Firstly, the evidence the author cites is open to doubt in several respects. The first flaws is whether the study is scientific and reliable or not . It is unknown how the study is made and the result can represent the overall situation in East Meria. The second one is that  the people in East Meria visit the doctor only once or twice per year for treatment of colds can not mean that they seldom get colds. It is quite possible that those people often get colds but because the transportation in East Meria is not convient enough that people donot  visit the doctor until their situation is serious. The last one is that even if the people seldom get colds, the author can not contribute it to the high consumption of fish without excluding other possible reasons. It is possible that those people like to take exercise, therefore keep in good healthy.

Secondly, even if eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds, the author's suggestion about lchthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, is unconvincing. As we all know, there many kinds of nutritions in fish, but the  lchthaid is just one kind of supplement, the effectivity of which is open to doubt. It is possible that the fish oil itself does not contain the useful substance to prevent colds, then the supplement derived from fish oil is of no use.

Thirdly, the author does not consider why there are so many absences from school and workplaces, and whether they are really get colds. If colds are just an excuse for absences, then even the Ichthaid can prevent students and employers from colds, they can still find some other excuses to be absent. Without excluding this possibility, the daily use of Ichthaid will be useless in reducing absenteeism in schools and workplaces.   

In sum, the statement is not convincing as it stands. To strengthen it, the author should provide more information to demonstrate that those absences are indeed caused by coldes rather than use colds as an excuse. Moreover, the author should give more evidences to convince us that eating fish is beneficial to prevent colds. It is better to ensure that the Ichthaid has the effectivity of eating fish.

yuviUID: 2169411

第17次作业互改顺序:

小蜗牛-->yuvi--->Kitty-->小蜗牛

[ 本帖最后由 yuvi 于 2006-6-7 21:46 编辑 ]

yuviUID: 2169411

改KITTY的:

（1）没有提供充分信息证明吃鱼能防止感冒：首先，一年只去一两次医院不代表只得一两次感冒，可能有些人在家买药不去医院；其次，当地人是否还采取其他方式预防感冒；(同意)
（2）该研究结果是否适用于西部不得而知；（还是那句话：ＥＡＳＴ　ＭＥＲＩＡ只是那个地区的名字．不见得它就是在东部啊．．）
（3）即使研究结果适用，该物质从鱼油中提炼是否仍然有效作者没有证明；（同意）
（4）不能排除人们以感冒作为迟到的借口（同意）

In the memo, the arguer recommends the daily use of Ichthaid as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeims（absenteeism）. To support his conclusion, he cited a study reports of the East Meria. Plausible as the argument seems at first glance, there some flaws to be questioned after we have close examination.（觉得开头写得太含糊了，有点抢）

Firstly, the author fails to offer sufficient evidence to establish a causal relationship between the fish consumption and the increaing （increasing） immunity from cold. On the one hand, the mere fact that the people in EM visit the doctor once or twice per year does not mean they only catch cold once or twice a year.It highly possible that many people who are catching cold  would rather take medicine at home than going to hospital for high remedy cost. On the other hand, we are not informed whether the local people use other meatures to prevent cold virus.If they concern more about their health so as to do enough exercises daily,they are unlikly（unlikely） to be suffered from cold. Without ruling out these possibilities, we can not justifiably accept the author's conclusion. （最后一句有模版嫌疑：）

Even if eating fish is good for preventing the cold, the author does not provide enough evidence to substantiate this experience still works in West Meria. We have little information about the two areas. Are the climate patterns in these two area similar? What is consisited of their population? If there are huge difference between them, the result of the study can not be applied to the west regardless of obvious perfermance in the east. （名字是East不见得真的是在东部啊。。）

Admittedly,  the study of the east is reasonable and can be popularized, we are not sure whether Ichthaid has the same effect.Sofaras it is a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, we have good reason to doubt whether the crital gerdient is still remained. Neither the author explains which  gredient in the fish might take this affection,nor does he guarantee Icthaid contains this gredient.Unless the arguor can sweep out all the questioned analysised above, can he convinces us his conclusion.（完全同意）

Last but not least, the arguer draws his conlusion on a groundless assumption that if people won't catch cold, they will not be late any more since colds are the most frequent reason given for absence from school and work. However, common sense tells us, people usually use cold as an excuse for their absenteeism. It does not necessarily true, but we can not exclude this possiblity. Consequently, the author's proposal is somewhat immature to be acceptable.   （同意）

In sum, if author aims to solve the lower absenteeism, he should investegate the real reason for which peole are late. Furthemore, deep reaseach is needed befor we take Ichthaid daily as a remedy from cold.

总结：

看得出来kitty写得比较匆忙，里面有不少错别字哈~~
这次内容挺丰富的，各个层次都有涉及。我觉得思想挺不错：）
就是要注意一下，不要把题目里的细节过度延伸成为论点哈，点到为止就可以了。：）
还有要再次感谢kitty这几次一直按时完成作业，给我们打气，带来了不少动力，继续加油。。：）