Issue212 FLY AW作业组

kckUID: 2214868

今天基本限时成功了，不过写的很烂.很多问题都没展开,,
限时感觉还是不一样,还要加油好好训练!
TOPIC: ISSUE212 - "If a goal is worthy, then any means taken to attain it is justifiable."
WORDS: 404          TIME: 0:45:00          DATE: 2006-6-2
提纲:
1.通常人们都会为值得的目标付出行动
2.但是,我们的这些行动也许对自身而言是值得的,但是也许会对别人造成大的伤害,因此是不可行的
3.在社会和国家层面上来说也确实如此
   Whether we could take any ways to achieve a goal that is worthy for us? Generally speaking, people may think it is justify for individuals to pursue their own objectives even if they may suffer certain losses for doing so. However, there are far more other aspects, including personal interests, we should consider when we concern about this issue.
  As we all know, people always weigh a lot before they decide whether to conduct actions to attain certain goals. This is especially common when they face issues, admittedly, which are more often, that bring both benefits and losses. Through such a process, it is quite reasonable for them to take actions for their worthy goals. For instance, if one thinks that anticipating a marathon race would be meaningful even if this would cost him lots of time to train for it and even may bring about injures, then he would give up other activities and prepare himself for the possible injures. Or moreover, he may have to persuade his family members to allow him to do so. In sum, people always try all means to achieve their worthy goals.
  However, on the other hand, our activities always affect others in this society. Then, the comparatively less important losses which result from people's effort to achieve their goals may become severe to others. Under this condition, it may not be justify for individuals to take any means to attain their objectives, especially when this may damage other's freedom or basic rights. For example, even if one thinks that to steal may be the only way to survive for him, though this may bring him severe punishment, he still can't take actions to achieve his goal. In sum, we cannot decide whether to take actions for certain goal only by weighing it is whether worthy enough for you, we should consider influences that such activities may bring to others.
  As to the level of our society or nations, the situation is still the same. A society can try their best to achieve certain useful goals, though this may lead to great losses in other areas. For instance, people from many areas can work together to save a little girl's life even this may cause great economic suffer as such actions may affect many relevant productions. On the other hand, a country cannot only consider their own interests when handling international affaires. For example, it is unfair for American to intervene domestic affairs of Iraq for the purpose of oil supply, though this is crucial for the development of itself.
  In sum, the speaker 's assertion is too extreme and before we decide whether to act or not, we  should consider more than ourselves.

[ 本帖最后由 kck 于 2006-6-2 21:58 编辑 ]

风中尘埃UID: 164965

Whether we could take any ways to achieve a goal that is worthy for us? Generally speaking, people may think it is justify [justifiable] for individuals to pursue their own objectives even if they may suffer certain losses for doing so. However, there are far more other aspects, including personal interests, we should consider when we concern about this issue.
  As we all know, people always weigh a lot before they decide whether to conduct [an] actions to attain certain goals. This is especially common when they face issues, admittedly, which are more often, that bring both benefits and losses. Through such a process, it is quite reasonable for them to take actions for their worthy goals. For instance, if one thinks that anticipating [participating呵呵，我也经常搞错] a marathon race would be meaningful even if this would cost him lots of time to train for it and even may bring about injures, then he would give up other activities and prepare himself for the possible injures. Or moreover, he may have to persuade his family members to allow him to do so. In sum, people always try all means to achieve their worthy goals. [开头说的是衡量，结尾却总结说尝试所有方法去达成，呼应不够吧]
  However, on the other hand, our activities always affect others in this society. Then, the comparatively less important losses which result from people's effort to achieve their goals may become severe to others. Under this condition, it may not be justify [-ied] for individuals to take any means to attain their objectives, especially when this may damage other's freedom or basic rights. For example, even if one thinks that to steal may be the only way to survive for him, though this may bring him severe punishment, he still can't take actions to achieve his goal. [这个例子不够有力，没说明白为什么can not，可以加点，顺便字数也多点] In sum, we cannot decide whether to take actions for certain goal only by weighing it is whether worthy enough for you, [and] we should consider influences that such activities may bring to others.
  As to the level of our society or nations, the situation is still the same. A society can try their best to achieve certain useful goals, though this may lead to great losses in other areas. For instance, people from many areas can work together to save a little girl's life even this may cause great economic suffer as such actions may affect many relevant productions. On the other hand, a country cannot only consider their own interests when handling international affaires. For example, it is unfair for American to intervene domestic affairs of Iraq for the purpose of oil supply, though this is crucial for the development of itself.
  In sum, the speaker 's assertion is too extreme and before we decide whether to act or not, we  should consider more than ourselves. [结尾再升华一下，说说道德啦，共同进步啦等等，我也是刚刚想到的。仿佛看到结尾能体会你时间到了的感受]

写得比我的有条理，呵呵

[ 本帖最后由 风中尘埃 于 2006-6-4 19:55 编辑 ]

honeyviolaUID: 2199703

Whether we could take any ways to achieve a goal that is worthy for us? Generally speaking, people may think it is justify for individuals to pursue their own objectives even if they may suffer certain losses for doing so. However, there are far more other aspects, including personal interests, we should consider when we concern about this issue.
  As we all know, people always weigh a lot before they decide whether to conduct actions to attain certain goals. This is especially common when they face issues, admittedly, which are more often, that bring both benefits and losses. Through such a process, it is quite reasonable for them to take actions for their worthy goals. For instance, if one thinks that anticipating a marathon race would be meaningful even if this would cost him lots( 原形？） of time to train for it and even may bring about injures, then he would give up other activities and prepare himself for the possible injures. Or moreover, he may have to persuade his family members to allow him to do so. In sum, people always try all means to achieve their worthy goals.（是不是可以再理顺些，就是人们思前想后做事情的结果就是人们制定出的目标是有价值的，不知道楼主是否是这个意思）  However, on the other hand, our activities always affect others in this society. Then, the comparatively less important losses which result from people's effort to achieve their goals may become severe to others. Under this condition, it may not be justify for individuals to take any means to attain their objectives, especially when this may damage other's freedom or basic rights. For example, even if one thinks that to steal may be the only way to survive for him, though this may bring him severe punishment, he still can't take actions to achieve his goal. In sum, we cannot decide whether to take actions for certain goal only by weighing it is whether worthy enough for you, we should consider influences that such activities may bring to others.
  As to the level of our society or nations, the situation is still the same. A society can try their best to achieve certain useful goals, though this may lead to great losses in other areas. For instance, people from many areas can work together to save a little girl's life even this may cause great economic suffer as such actions may affect many relevant productions. On the other hand, a country cannot only consider their own interests when handling international affaires. For example, it is unfair for American to intervene domestic affairs of Iraq for the purpose of oil supply, though this is crucial for the development of itself.后两段论述的挺充分的
  In sum, the speaker 's assertion is too extreme and before we decide whether to act or not, we  should consider more than ourselves.

exp03UID: 2158827

嗯 觉得节后很好
感觉第二段内容稍有点空,还是用实例说话更能说服人
第三段的例子感觉选得不太好吧,要写一个人的目标还受其他因素的影响可以写一个人有可能为了家庭放弃事业之类的来得更真实可信
嗯 限时能写好 很不错