issue11 [清凉夏日一组作业贴]

helenlhhUID: 2127690

TOPIC: ISSUE11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 669          TIME: 0:45:00         

I agree with the author that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. As most of the nations are developing in a considerable speed and the world is becoming smaller than before, cases such as cooperation are becoming more frequently than ever before in different fields. If a global university is built, it will be more convenient for people all over the world to communicate, exchange ideas and promote for a better future.

In the first place, the function of a university is not only to cultivate specialized work force for the society, it also takes the tasks of study and research in various fields that will ultimately benefit the society. In this case, the establishment of global university will help to better development in many fields' sophisticated studies for the share of knowledge and achievements. It is known to all that although some developed countries posses a large portion of achievements in the world, there are many subjects that are not good at due to their cultures and some geographic reasons. And the development of one subject is related to other fields, we can never find a purely independent subject that has no relation to others. If any fields of study need improvement, they should turn to other fields of study, as a whole, to accomplish goal in the future. The vital advantage of the development of global university is to provide a space for more exchange and share of most of the sophisticated study in this world and speed up the development of the human race.

Another advantage the global university bring us will be the understanding of each countries. The present occasion is not so sounding that many people in western countries have a misconception about people in other part of the world. They often suppose people in Asia in poverty and dress in a way that is quite differently from them. When they see Asians walking in the street in London, they are startling because they can hardly imagine that the man dress similar to them and speak influent English is from Asia. If a global university is established, it will create lots of opportunities for students from different part of the world to work together for the same problem and in the process, help them to know each other better and further, have a better and exact understanding of their countries.

We cannot deny the possibility, on the other hand, that there might be some conflicts among so many young people who are educated in diverse environment. We admit that these students may hold quite different values,  differ in ways of thinking and prefer different ways of solving the same problem. But this does not present a problem because there can never be the absence of conflicts between two people even if they share many commons. The cooperation among global students will wake them up to realize the difference between culture and try, by themselves, to deal with the conflicts in a proper way. Soppose a Israel student meet a Arabian guy in the same laboratory and work together for some days, they may find they share many things such as the interest in the same subjects, eagerness for a better life and anxiety for a peaceful world although they have different beliefs in regional questions. They may become friends instead of enemy that their country beliefs lead them to. This will help them to develop their communication skills that will benefit them in the future when they grow up and dealing with international matters.

In sum, we should advocate the idea of establish a global university for students from different countries to share their knowledge, ideas and prepare them for a better relation between different countries. By doing so, we can expect for a better future that is prosperous in science and technology, and a peaceful world with no war and better understanding of diverse culture.

不瞒大家说，这篇是我上次机考前两天写的，现在看看，感叹久了不练，大不如从前了。
不过还是请大家帮我看一下，有什么毛病尽管批

[ 本帖最后由 helenlhh 于 2006-7-17 20:56 编辑 ]

helenlhhUID: 2127690

自己顶一下

abawtresbonUID: 2164961

I agree with the author that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. As most of the (of the 去掉)nations are developing in(at) a considerable speed and the world is becoming smaller than before, cases such as cooperation are becoming more frequently than ever before in different fields. If a global university is built, it will be more convenient for people all over the world to communicate, exchange ideas and promote for a better future.观点很鲜明,最后一句很到位

In the first place, the function of a university is not only to cultivate specialized work force for the society, it also takes the tasks of study and research in various fields that will ultimately benefit the(the去掉) society. In this case, the establishment of global university will help to better development in many fields' sophisticated studies for the share of (for the share of 改to share) knowledge and achievements. It is (has been) known to all that although some developed countries posses a large portion(propotion) of achievements in the world, there are many subjects that are not good at due to their cultures and some geographic reasons(这句话我不太明白,是要说其他国家没有取得什么成就的问题吗?). And the development of one subject is related to other fields, we can never find a purely independent subject that has no relation(relationship) to others. If any fields of study need improvement, they should turn to other fields of study(other fields of study用them代), as a whole, to accomplish goal in the future. The vital advantage of the development of global university is to provide a space for more exchange(exchanges) and share(sharing) of most of the sophisticated study in this world and speed up the development of the(the去掉) human race. 这段纯说理了,有点罗嗦,如果能精简一下会好些

Another advantage the global university bring(+s to) us will be the(-the+deeper mutual) understanding of each countries. The present occasion (situation)is not so sounding that many people in western countries have a misconception about(towards) people in other part of the world. They often suppose people in Asia in(as) poverty and dress in a way that is quite differently from them (poor who dress in a way that is less fationable thanthem ). When they see Asians walking in the street in London, they are startling(startled) because they can hardly imagine that the man(a person) dress similar to them and speak influent(fluent) English is from Asia. If a global university is established, it will create lots of opportunities for students from different part of the world to work together for the same problem and in the process, help them to know each other better and further, have a better and exact understanding of their countries.  我觉得这个例子不太有力,如果说建一大学只是让人不要看低第三世界我觉得理由不充分.后面的补述拉回一成,换一个例子就好了

We cannot deny the possibility, on the other hand, that there might be some conflicts among so many young people who are educated in diverse environment (fields). We admit that these students may hold quite different values,  differ in (in 去掉)ways of thinking and prefer different ways of solving the same problem. But this does not present(cause)a problem because there can never be the absence of conflicts between two people even if they share many commons(用COMMON ideas 好一些) among global students will wake them up to realize the difference (- the +differences) between culture and try (???), by themselves, to deal with the conflicts in a proper way. Soppose(suppose) a Israel(Israeli) student meet(meets) a(an) Arabian guy(不够正式) in the same laboratory and work together for some days, they may find they share many things such as the interest in the same subjects, eagerness for a better lifecau （???）anxiety for a peaceful world although they have different beliefs in regional questions. They may become friends instead of enemy that their country beliefs lead them to. This will help them to develop their communication skills that will benefit them in the future when they grow up and dealing with international matters.  这里几乎没有为学生友谊，理解－－＞国家和平的连接，最后这个理解怎么有由个人升华的要写一下，才有点说服力In sum, we should advocate the idea of establish a global university for students from different countries to share their knowledge, ideas and prepare them for a better relation between different countries. By doing so, we can expect for a better future that is prosperous in science and technology, and a peaceful world with no war and better understanding of diverse culture.

abawtresbonUID: 2164961

我觉得这篇虽然字多但是没有你这段时间写的两篇有深度，这篇body部分不够紧扣中心．

尽说些缺点了，不好意思啊

helenlhhUID: 2127690

谢谢阿宝的意见！看来我该好好把这篇改改

PsychocandyUID: 171159

TOPIC: ISSUE11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 669          TIME: 0:45:00         

I agree with the author that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. As most of the nations are developing in a considerable speed and the world is becoming smaller than before, cases such as cooperation are becoming more frequently than ever before in different fields. If a global university is built, it will be more convenient for people all over the world to communicate, exchange ideas and promote for a better future.

In the first place, the function of a university is not only to cultivate specialized work force for the society, it also takes the tasks of study and research in various fields that will ultimately benefit the society. In this case, the establishment of global university will help to better development in many fields' sophisticated studies for the share of knowledge and achievements. It is known to all that although some developed countries posses a large portion of achievements in the world, there are many subjects that are not good at due to their cultures and some geographic reasons. And the development of one subject is related to other fields, we can never find a purely independent subject that has no relation to others. If any fields of study need improvement, they should turn to other fields of study, as a whole, to accomplish goal in the future. The vital advantage of the development of global university is to provide a space for more exchange and share of most of the sophisticated study in this world and speed up the development of the human race.[这段主要讲的是交流如何促进研究]

Another advantage the global university bring us will be the understanding of each countries. The present occasion is not so sounding [这个sounding是什么意思？]that many people in western countries have a misconception about people in other part of the world. They often suppose people in Asia[缺个主语，这里加live] in poverty and dress in a way that is quite differently[different] from them. When they see Asians walking in the street in London, they are startling[startling意思是very unusual or surprising，应该把startling改成startled] because they can hardly imagine that the man [who]dress similar to[similar是形容词，不能修饰动词dress] them and speak influent[没有influent这个词，改成fluent放在句中好象也合适，或者改成halting？] English is from Asia. If a global university is established, it will create lots of opportunities for students from different part[parts] of the world to work together for the same problem and in the process, help them to know each other better and further, have a better and exact understanding of their countries.[这段的中心是全球大学可以加强各国之间的交流]
[所以上面这两段应该是两层，而不是并列的，共同证明全球大学促进研究]
We cannot deny the possibility, on the other hand, that there might be some conflicts among so many young people who are educated in diverse environment. We admit that these students may hold quite different values, differ in ways of thinking and prefer different ways of solving the same problem. But this does not present a problem because there can never be the absence of conflicts between two people even if they share many commons[common作为共同点不能这么用，改成even if they have a lot in common]. The cooperation among global students will wake them up to realize the difference between culture and try, by themselves, to deal with the conflicts in a proper way. Soppose a Israel student meet a Arabian guy in the same laboratory and work together for some days, they may find they share many things such as the interest in the same subjects, eagerness for a better life and anxiety for a peaceful world although they have different beliefs in regional questions. They may become friends instead of enemy that their country beliefs lead them to. This will help them to develop their communication skills that will benefit them in the future when they grow up and dealing[deal] with international matters.
[这段讲的是分歧是怎么解决的]


In sum, we should advocate the idea of establish[establish是动词，这里应该是名词] a global university for students from different countries to share their knowledge, ideas and prepare them for a better relation between different countries. By doing so, we can expect for[expect及物，去掉for] a better future that is prosperous in science and technology, and a peaceful world with no war and better understanding of diverse culture.

我感觉这篇文章论述关于交流写的多，而关于如何促进研究，solving the world's most persistent social problems这一层上写的不够。