issue51[practise小组作业７月２６日］

子旋UID: 2196177

Issue51 “Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.”
The past decades has witnessed the increasingly rapid development in the field of education. The effect of education is based on the means in teaching progress and then influences the efficiency of our society. That the individual needs and interests of students stimulate their ability of creativity and hard-working indeed seems to be so obvious and conclusive as scarcely to justify such a discussion in any place. However, the education designed for all the students is effective in some degree and we can not conclude too hastily. I content myself with a more particular answer, which merits, in several points of view, very particular attention.
The definition of “Education” is expanding horizons and developing innate abilities. Also, transference of ideas and skills from one person to another or a group is remarked as its goal. It covers a range of experiences, from formal learning to the building of understanding through day to day experience. So, it requires both the basic knowledge and common experiences that formal education prepared us and the specific learning of individuals.
In the first place, we can not deny the great power generated from one’s own need and interests. When a man makes some observations of one thing he is interested in, he will easily remember the feature of it and makes analysis, comprehending the factors of it as a whole again but thoroughly knowing the relations between those parts. He would like to spend most of his time and energy in some special subject. His fate tied with the will. He learns, makes suppositions and then, with further developing logical ways of thinking and action, he makes deductions, drawing conclusions out of cases. We have seen a great number of artists and scientists attribute their brilliant careers to having opportunities to access to the subjects they interested and developing the interests in the following years. Interest is the best teacher.
Let it be remarked, in the second place, that the standard education system applied for many years is reasonable and stable in some cases. It is true that our education should serve as a tool of educating skilled people; that it should adhere to the needs and interests of individuals. Indeed, it is extremely probable, that our thinking and action reflect special interest. However, standardized education offers us the basic experience and background directing the pathway of interest. Firstly, students can get the most foundational knowledge in standard studying. It may not be improper to take notice of that any principle or filed in this world can betray the basic and common essence. And we need to prepare ourselves these foundations before setting up our own specifics and developing further discoveries. Secondly, the uniform education presents the relation between social opportunities and our interests. We can see the feasibility value of our interested field and then    adjust our desire to the needs of reality. A third and still more important consideration is that this standard form education can reach our goal of cultivating many students at a basic lever. We all get through the period of common study. Those prominent figures just understand themselves better and choose their topic appropriately. They amplify the interests and study further with the means they studied in the standard education period. They utilize both their instinct and interests perfectly.   
Last but not the least, all the considerations taken together above warrant us in affirming another conclusion that the standardized education benefits the determination of one’s choice of specific career and interests. Without the study of common experience, we can not understand what we are interested in and would prefer as our professional career. We also cannot define the value and meaning of interests, so the interest itself lost the power of stimulating creative.
In sum, although need to be further developed and specialized to suit the needs and interests of individuals in the later time, standard education is also effective in the universal form. It is not necessary that the standard education should be perfect; it is sufficient that the completely specialized education is more imperfect.

SayyesUID: 2186610

The past decades has witnessed the increasingly rapid development in the field of education. The effect of education is based on the means in teaching progress and then influences the efficiency of our society.[前两句没有起到引出主题的作用，可删] That the individual needs and interests of students stimulate their ability of creativity and hard-working indeed seems to be so obvious and conclusive as scarcely to justify such a discussion in any place.[这句话有点绕，而且没谈到教育] However, the education designed for all the students is effective in some degree and we can not conclude too hastily.[题目的关键词是effective，主题便是讨论specifically designed education是否真正effective。从全文看，作者是否定的，此处主题句and以前是赞同意思，用and连接没有转折之意，can not conclude too hastily这里也看不出确切论点] I content myself with a more particular answer, which merits, in several points of view, very particular attention.

The definition of “Education” is expanding horizons and developing innate abilities. Also, transference of ideas and skills from one person to another or a group is [remarked as 删] its goal. It covers a range of experiences, from formal learning to the building of understanding through day to day experience. So, it requires both the basic knowledge and common experiences that formal education prepared us and the specific learning of individuals. [在这里给Education下定义，为后文的论述提供前提，这方法很好。但是本文应讨论的是effective education, 在这里定义effective 不是更好吗，定义Education对本文立场没有多大辅助作用 ]

In the first place, we can not deny the great power generated from one’s own need and interests. When a man makes some observations of one thing he is interested in, he will easily remember the feature of it and makes analysis, comprehending the factors of it as a whole again but thoroughly knowing the relations between those parts. He would like to spend most of his time and energy in some special subject. His fate tied with the will. He learns, makes suppositions and then, with further developing logical ways of thinking and action, he makes deductions, drawing conclusions out of cases. We have seen a great number of artists and scientists attribute their brilliant careers to having opportunities to access to the subjects they interested and developing the interests in the following years. Interest is the best teacher.[这一整段都在谈interest的作用，没有education和effective, 有跑题之嫌。建议修改此段，开始加主题句，后面拉回到主题specifically designed education确有好的地方]

Let it be remarked, in the second place, that the [standard education system给个定义] applied for many years is reasonable and stable in some cases. It is true that our education should serve as a tool of educating skilled people; that it should adhere to the needs and interests of individuals. Indeed, it is extremely probable, that our thinking and action reflect special interest. However, standardized education offers us the basic experience and background directing the pathway of interest. Firstly, students can get the most foundational knowledge in standard studying. It may not be improper to take notice of that any principle or filed in this world can betray the basic and common essence. And we need to prepare ourselves these foundations before setting up our own specifics and developing further discoveries. Secondly, the uniform education presents the relation between social opportunities and our interests. We can see the feasibility value of our interested field and then    adjust our desire to the needs of reality. A third and still more important consideration is that this standard form education can reach our goal of cultivating many students at a basic lever. We all get through the period of common study. Those prominent figures just understand themselves better and choose their topic appropriately. They amplify the interests and study further with the means they studied in the standard education period. They utilize both their instinct and interests perfectly. [ 这段感觉比较混乱，好像一直在谈standard education system，跑题了]

Last but not the least, all the considerations taken together above warrant us in affirming another conclusion that the standardized education benefits the determination of one’s choice of specific career and interests. Without the study of common experience, we can not understand what we are interested in and would prefer as our professional career. We also cannot define the value and meaning of interests, so the interest itself lost the power of stimulating creative.

In sum, although need to be further developed and specialized to suit the needs and interests of individuals in the later time, standard education is also effective in the universal form. It is not necessary that the standard education should be perfect; it is sufficient that the completely specialized education is more imperfect.


楼主的文笔不错啊，用词，句式都很好:O。
整体上的问题就是没扣题，结构很散，逻辑层次不清晰
楼主在提纲上还要多下功夫呢，慢慢来，大家一齐进步:)。

子旋UID: 2196177

谢谢指教啊，呵呵！