smile-A补交作业一argument53，25个婴儿那篇，请指教

xinxinwUID: 2144273

Based on two incomplete surveys of the personalities of infancies and teenagers, the arguer asserted that it is the increased levels of melatonin before birth that cause shyness during infancy and the shyness continues into later life. However, if we look into the basis of this conclusion—the two studies—they are problematic themselves.

First of all, the study about infants picked 25 infants, a so small sample size that it can not present the general situation depicted in the arguer’s conclusion. Besides, in the later procedure in which the birth time of these 25 infants are compared with that of other infants, the speaker fails to give out any detailed information about the size of the compared group, and how more likely the 25 infants have been conceived in early autumn are not informed to us. In the absence of the precise study numbers such as how many out of 25 infants were given birth in the early autumn and the rate in the compared group, it is impossible for the arguer to reach his/her first opinion that the distressed infants are more likely to be born in the early autumn. Moreover, the sign of mild distress which can be explained either as an aggressive expression or prudent characteristic is merely equated, according to the speaker, with the shyness appeared in their teenage, which is also an unwarranted equivalence. And this sign was attributed by the author only to the increased melatonin-a hormone known to affect some brain functions in the mothers’ body when conceiving the babies, which shows the arguer confuses the concurrence with causal relationship Albeit the increased hormone production and the conceiving of the baby happened at the same time, it does not necessarily prove they have, if any, cause and effect relationship. It is entirely possible that other elements in their mothers’ body should count for the sign emerged after birth, or even the way mothers cradle their babies can lead to the babies reaction towards stimuli.

Secondly, in the teenagers’ study, the arguer only select “more than half of these 25 children” as his sample, which could not represent even the group of 25 children, let alone children in general. Lacking the precise number of the study such as the percentage of teenagers who show the personality of shyness and to which extent they are influenced by the hormone before birth, this evidence can not lend any support to the conclusion. Further more, the answer and identification from respondent teenagers who may mistake the reluctance to speak to a girl/boy, or even timidity to perform a bold action to be shyness do not make up a cogent evidence at all to illustrate that they show the shyness in their later life.

Finally, the conclusion based on the two unsubstantiated studies ascribed the shyness appeared in the children’s infancy and later life merely to the increased levels of melatonin before birth without taking other possibilities into consideration. There is a good chance that the child has been brought up in a family environment in which his/her parents protect him/her so meticulously and assiduously as to separate the child with the outer world entirely or child was influenced by his/her friends who are also shy. Before rule out all the possibilities I stated above, the conclusion can not be drawn persuasively.

To improve the reliability of this argument, the arguer might consider to obtain some information about the child born in winter when according to the study, the quantity of melatonin-a hormone reaches climax in mother’s body and other seasons of the year to do the comparing and contrast work in order to illustrate the link, besides, more substantial data is needed in each study and a comprehensive analysis of the two studies is required to reach the ultimate conclusion.

1。伤其十指莫如断其一指；
2。虽然同属于第一个study的错误，vague data和concurrence & causal effect是两个错误，应该分为两段

猫猫寿司UID: 2219543

好的好的，谢谢指教！自己也觉得写这么多错误很崩溃的说