Argument145 请拍拍

EricatutuUID: 2297398

In the argument, the author reaches the conclusion that those who snore should try to eat less and to exercise more to keep fit.  To support the conclusion, the author cites a new study which shows that people who snore are fatter to those who do not.  Additionally, the author reasons that those who snore frequently stop breathe for a few seconds and it leads those people to tired to do the exercise when they wake up.  At first glance, this argument appears to be somewhat convincing, but further reflection reveals that it omits some important concerns that should be addressed to substantiate the argument.

The threshold problem with the argument is that the study cited by the author is too vague to be informative.  The author fails to provide the information about who conducted the study, how many people involved in the study, how long did the study take where and how the study was conducted.  Lacking information whether the number of people involved is statistically significant and whether the study contained a controlled group who do not snore, the author cannot validate the conclusion that those who snore are more likely to gain weight than those who do not.  Until these questions are answered the results of the study are worthless as evidence for the conclusion.

Even though the study were tenable, the argument assumes that all the people who snore experience a condition called sleep apnea, which causes them awake during the sleep even unnoticed.  The author provides no evidence to substantiate the assumption.  It is entirely possible that all the people who snore do sleep soundly that they never wake up.  In the contrast, common sense informs me that all people can be awake during the sleep even suffer from insomnia no matter they snore or not.  Only the author can provide me concrete evidence that all the people who snore meet sleep apnea can I be convinced by the conclusion upon it.

Even if I were concede that people who snore frequently meet sleep apnea, the argument relies on the assumption that it is because of the sleep apnea that causes those people too tired to do exercises and this leads to their obesity.  There's a lot of reasons can cause obesity.  Perhaps the genetic prediction of the people who snores also include some fat genetics that cause those easily getting fatter even though they do a lot of exercises during the daytime.  Or perhaps those who snore are companied with other diseases, which can lead to obesity, like diabetics.  The author's failure to investigate or even consider the either scenario render the argument highly suspect.

Finally, even if the author could provide some evidence that people snoring have some causal relation with their obesity, the author fails to consider some other means to help them keep fit.  Eating less and doing more exercise may have some effect on keeping fit, but they cannot solve the basic problem that they snore and suffer from sleep apnea.  With the latest medical techniques, doctors can do something to help them stop snoring during the sleep through some certain operation.  This can be the best way to solve the problem.

In sum, the author fails to validate the conclusion that anyone who snores should try to eat less and exercise more to keep fit.  In order to make the argument logically acceptable, the author should provide us more data to make the study reliable.  Additionally, the author needs to offer us concrete evidence that all the people who snore suffer from sleep apnea and this have some causal relation with their obesity.

[ 本帖最后由 lastangel 于 2007-2-16 09:46 编辑 ]

EricatutuUID: 2297398

The author suggests people who snore eating less than the average person and doing more exercisesto keep fit by giving a study and some facts. However, this argument contains several logical flaws, which render it unconvincing.开头有点简单可以略微加点内容，饱满一点

To begin with, the study cited by the author is not statistically reliable. The author provides no information to show how many people respondentinvolved in this study, nor does the author provide enough information to prove the samples of this study is representative. It is possible that the fat people who snore were more willing to respond to the survey than other people were. It is also entirely possible that it's the company who wants to do its business does this study. 好像不是很恰当 Lacking enough evidence, the author cannot confidently draw any conclusion rely on this study.

Secondly, without sufficient confidences the author cannot assume that many of the people who snore will feel too tired and wake to exercise in the next daytime. As we all know, there are not a low percentage of people with snore in the wordworld, do these people feel tired and wake when they open there eyes at the next morning? The answer is not. Even if these people feel tired and wake as the author says, the author cannot conclude that they are too waketired to do any exercises. Some wake people can walk slowly and do some slightly body building. In sort, the author cannot convince me by this assumption.

Another problem of this argument is that the author believe eat more and no exercise cause the a person. The author provides no evidence noror study to provesubstantiate this argument. Common sense shows that eat more and no exercise is the only two aspects of the reasons why some people are fat, there are many other aspects such as inheritance, diseases, or pressures. So the author cannot convince me that eat less and do more exercises can help the fat people cut there fat efficiently.

Finally, the problem of this argument is that the author indicates that eating less and doing exercises are the only two ways to loose fat. However, there are many ways to cut fat such as drinking healthy tea, or taking pills which can help the weight reduced. Even if the people who snore gain weight easily, they can use other ways to keep health, not necessarily to do the things that the author suggests.

In sum, this argument is unpersuasive as it stands. To strengthen it, the author must provide better evidence that the study is statistically reliable. To better assess the argument I would need to know sufficient information to show that the snoring people feel too tired to do exercise. And I would also need to know it is the more eating and no exercising cause the snoring people fat.

tianeUID: 2299690

In the argument, the author reaches the conclusion that those who snore should try to eat less and to exercise more to keep fit.  To support the conclusion, the author cites a new study which shows that people who snore are fatter to（than） those who do not.  Additionally, the author reasons that those who snore frequently stop breathe for a few seconds and it leads those people to tired(it is adj.) to do the(需要么？特指那个？) exercise when they wake up.  At first glance, this argument appears to be somewhat convincing, but further reflection reveals that it omits some important concerns that should be addressed to substantiate the argument.

The threshold problem with the argument is that the study cited by the author is too vague to be informative？.  The author fails to provide the information about who conducted the study, how many people involved in the study, how long did the study take where and how the study was conducted.  Lacking information whether the number of people involved is statistically significant and whether the study contained a controlled group who do not snore, （感觉这句最好换成It is possible that …it is also possible that…）the author cannot validate the conclusion that those who snore are more likely to gain weight than those who do not.  Until these questions are answered the results of the study are worthless as evidence for the conclusion.

Even though the study were tenable, the argument assumes that all the people who snore experience a condition called sleep apnea, which causes them awake during the sleep even unnoticed.  The author provides no evidence to substantiate the assumption.  It is entirely possible that all the people who snore do sleep soundly that they never wake up.  In the contrast, common sense informs me that all people can be awake during the sleep even suffer from insomnia no matter they snore or not.  Only the author can provide me concrete evidence that all the people who snore meet sleep apnea can I be convinced by the conclusion upon it. (此段总体感觉很流利舒畅，值得我学习)

Even if I were concede that people who snore frequently meet sleep apnea, the argument relies on the assumption that it is because of the sleep apnea that causes those people too tired to do exercises and this leads to their obesity.  There's（are） a lot of reasons can cause obesity.  Perhaps the genetic prediction of the people who snores also include some fat genetics that cause those easily getting fatter even though they do a lot of exercises during the daytime（前后单复数不一致）.  Or perhaps those who snore are companied with（感觉suffer from比较好）other diseases, which can lead to obesity, like diabetics.  The author's failures to investigate or even consider the either scenario render the argument highly suspect.

Finally, even if the author could provide some evidence that people snoring（snoring people） have some causal relation with their obesity, the author fails to consider some other means to help them keep fit.  Eating less and doing more exercise may have some effect on keeping fit, but they cannot solve the basic problem that they snore and suffer from sleep apnea.  With the latest medical techniques, doctors can do something to help them stop snoring during the sleep through some certain operation.  This can be the best way to solve the problem.（此段也比较好）

In sum, the author fails to validate the conclusion that anyone who snores should try to eat less and exercise more to keep fit.  In order to make the argument logically acceptable, the author should provide us more data to make the study reliable.  Additionally, the author needs to offer us concrete evidence that all the people who snore suffer from sleep apnea and this have some causal relation with their obesity.

感觉写得比我好，字数比我的也多，由于水平有限，修改不是十分到位，只作为参考。