Argument147【SWEETBOX小组】第一次作业

jiangyue011UID: 2340595

-----题目------
The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.
'Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months.'
------正文------
The recommendation endorsed in this argument is that with newly introduced games the sales of Whirlwind video games would likely to increase dramatically in the few months. Based on several so-called reasons, the argument seems at first well-stated, however, close scrutiny reveals it conceals several logical flaws and is therefore not well-stated.

First of all, the survey , which is assumed to be a foundation of the arguer's conclusion, does not necessarily guarantee the sales of  Whirlwind video games. The most important factor in a certain game does not means the most determining factor of the sales of that game. Without information of the players' motive of buying a game and the market and trend of the sales of lifelike graphics games, one has good reason to doubt the real amount of the sales Whirlwind will achieve.  Also, the survey, which includes only video-game players, is not convincing to include the sales of Whirlwind at best. As is known to all, the buyers of a game involves people of many other background rather than simply players.

Secondly, even we admit that the survey means a rising trend of the sales of video game involves lifelike graphics, the sales of Whirlwind is also not assured. Since Whirwind has only introduced several games, it is entirely possible that many other companies have introduced far more games than Whirwind and making Whirwind a disadvantaged situation in the competition with others. Further, the strategy of  the advertisement might not be a successful one to guarantee the sales of Whirlwind. People aged 10 to 25 years may like playing video games awfully, but there is no clue that they will be the group that most likely to pay the fee of buying video games.  Still, because this kind of video game requires the most-up-date computers, which may be a luxury or only a dream of many players,  it is entirely possible that only a small amount of enthusiasts would buy Whirlwind's game.

Finally, even the video game is attracting to many players and Whirlwind could competitively do better than other companies, the conclusion that the sales will dramatically increase in the next few months is unfounded.  The sales of a certain product, which is determined by a myriad of factors, may go up and down at time to time. Moreover, the arguer gives us little, if any, evidence of the increase in only a few months. Without a comprehensive study of the purchasers, marketing, cost, philosophy of consumers, etc., it is too hasty to draw a conclusion of that kind.

In conclusion, the arguer fails to give us meticulous and thorough argumentation, making the conclusion of the argument a specious one. If the arguer were to take into account all the problems above, the argument would be more convincing.

这篇ARGU是草草完成的，大家帮忙看看哈。

zoe797970UID: 2249886

The recommendation endorsed in this argument is that with newly introduced games the sales of Whirlwind video games would likely to increase dramatically in the few months. Based on several so-called reasons, the argument seems at first well-stated, however, close scrutiny reveals it conceals several logical flaws and is therefore not well-stated.（使用简洁的语句总结出作者的观点，指出存在漏洞，很好）

First of all, the survey , which is assumed to be a foundation of the arguer's conclusion, does not necessarily guarantee the sales of  Whirlwind video games. The most important factor in a certain game does not means （单复数的问题）the most determining factor (貌似这种说法是不地道的，建议可以用determinant) of the sales of that game. Without information of the players' motive of buying a game and the market and trend of the sales of lifelike graphics games, one has good reason to doubt the real amount of the sales Whirlwind will achieve.（这句话很好） Also, the survey, which includes only video-game players, is not convincing to include the sales of Whirlwind at best. As is known to all, the buyers of a game involves people of many other background rather than simply players.（这句语法有问题）

Secondly, even we admit that the survey means a rising trend of the sales of video game involves lifelike graphics, the sales of Whirlwind is also not assured.（退步分析，条理很清晰） Since Whirwind has only introduced several games, it is entirely possible that many other companies have introduced far more games than Whirwind and making Whirwind a disadvantaged situation in the competition with others. Further, the strategy of  the advertisement might not be a successful one to guarantee the sales of Whirlwind. People aged 10 to 25 years may like playing video games awfully, but there is no clue that they will be the group that most likely to pay the fee of buying video games.  Still, because this kind of video game requires the most-up-date computers, which may be a luxury or only a dream of (to) many players,  it is entirely possible that only a small amount of enthusiasts would buy Whirlwind's game.

Finally, even the video game is attracting (attractive) to many players and Whirlwind could competitively do better than other companies, the conclusion that the sales will dramatically increase in the next few months is unfounded.  The sales of a certain product, which is determined by a myriad of factors, may go up and down at time to time. Moreover, the arguer gives us little, if any, evidence of the increase in only a few months. Without a comprehensive study of the purchasers, marketing, cost, philosophy of consumers, etc., it is too hasty to draw a conclusion of that kind.

In conclusion, the arguer fails to give us meticulous and thorough argumentation, making the conclusion of the argument a specious one. (这个模板挺不错的，呵呵)If the arguer were to take into account all the problems above, the argument would be more convincing.（总的说来，感觉老大的A逻辑上很严密，依据很充足吧，模板也挺不错的，只是有点小瑕疵，可能是老大有点急着干其他事情所以没有好好看看，也可能是我因为基础太差而看不懂有些句式。。。）

[ 本帖最后由 zoe797970 于 2007-5-30 11:55 编辑 ]