N0.82~

popsywinterUID: 2120302

82. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

When I was travelling in Germany and watched commercials on the TV, I was really impressed not only beacuse those advertisments are interesting but also that they are way different from the ones showing in China. According to my experience, I would agree with the statement above.

Firstly, adevertising can be a reflection of the culture and custom of a country. I am not saying that you can learn everything about a country by watching advertisments, but at least you can get general idea about daily life of local people, such as food, dressing and leisure actitivities. For example, in China, we always see advertisments of dumplings and rice wine, while in Germany, the major food and drinks selling on TV are mashed potatoes and beers. Also, you may see bars and coffee houses are the most used scenes of advertisments in many western countries. That is because people like to hang out in there in their spare time. However in Chinese advertisement, those scenes are hardly seen.

Furthermore, from which product quality that business are promoting we can tell the value of customers, therefore, of a country. An advertisment of automobile that I watched in Germany showed all the facinating functions and high-tech elements of that car. Interstingly, there is an advertisment in China, which is to promote the exact same car. However, instead of intorducing its fuctions, the one on Chinese TV focus on how the owner’s social statues and personal attraction were greatly incresed by possessing this car.

In conclusion, there is a lot to watch in a country’s advertising if you pay attention. It helps to understand better about the people in a country by knowing what they are instersed to buy. We can get to know about what they like to eat, where they often go and how they think about certain things.

豆豆～UID: 2378384

When I was travelling in Germany and watched commercials on the TV(on TV), I was really impressed not only beacuse those advertisments are(were) interesting but also that(not parallel, "that" ==> "because") they are way(too colloquial) different from the ones showing in China.(This sentence is pretty good actually, but I would change it a little bit so it would look more impressive: "Watching commercials on TV when I was traveling in Germany, I was entirely impressed because not only those advertisements were interesting but also they were extremely different from those showed in China." I just re-ordered some of the phrases, but it seems more fluent now:-p) According to my experience, I would agree with the statement above(huh-huh... This is not nice. You'd better state your opinion crystal clear, which means you gotta say: "I agree with the point that blah blah blah...").

Firstly, adevertising(advertising) can be a reflection of the culture and custom of a(one) country. I am not saying that you can learn everything about a country by watching advertisments, but at least you can get general idea about daily life of local people, such as food, dressing and leisure actitivities(activities).(I'm glad to see you trying to write more complex sentences, but, you gotta be aware of the logic in the sentence. btw, avoid using "you" while exemplifying, American idiots don't like it.... You can go like this: "Although one cannot learn everything about a country merely by watching advertisements, he can still get fruitful information about some customs, such as food, dressing styles, leisure activities, etc.") For example, in China, we always see advertisments of dumplings and rice wine, while in Germany, the major food and drinks selling on TV are mashed potatoes and beers. Also, you may see bars and coffee houses are the most used scenes of advertisments in many western countries. (You may say "Also, one may see bars and cafe houses frequently appearing on TV commercials in most western countries," i guess?) That is because people like to hang out in there(delete "in there", because it's vague.) in their spare time. However in Chinese advertisement, those scenes are("are" ==> "can be". I don't know why I changed it... I just wanted to... HA) hardly seen.

Furthermore, from which product quality that business are promoting we can tell (should it be "can we tell"??? I'm a little bit confused. You'd better check it out on dictionary or other stuff.) the value of customers, therefore, of a country.(Good One!) An advertisment of (an) automobile that I watched in Germany showed all the facinating(fascinating) functions and high-tech elements of that car. Interstingly(Interestingly, but I think "Conversely" would be better placed here.), there is an advertisment in China, which is to promote the exact same car. However, instead of intorducing(introducing) its fuctions, the one on Chinese TV focus(ed) on how the owner’s social statues and personal attraction were greatly incresed by possessing this car.

In conclusion, there is a lot to watch in a country’s advertising if you pay attention. It helps to understand better about the people in a(that) country by knowing("It" cannot "know" anything, "you" are the one who should know something.) what they are instersed to buy. We can get to know about what they like to eat, where they often go and how they think about certain things.


All in All:

First, I have to say that you've done a great job. Your examples are convincing and your logic is very fluent.

However(like there always has to be one...), I think you should pay more attention to the complex sentences you've written, because once you wrote them, you gotta make sure that they are logically possible and they do not read awkward.

BTW, plz, plz practice your typing skills... these holy typing mistakes will impede the progress of getting a 5 on the test.


GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR ESSAY!!