issue51 |0806G-AW小组|第二次作业

Northeast-WindUID: 2408896

51"Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."

Words:584   Time:2.5 hours

教育的概念限定为学校教育，其目标在于to enlighten, to know, to lead。学校教育是否真正有效要取决于能否较好的实现目标，另外也需要同时考虑到实现这目标的可行性如保障公正和资源。鉴于此，我认为这个观点不能使教育真正有效，并且对于人的全面发展乃至社会的解放都是不利的。
（1）To enlighten。建立一种合理的世界观。认识自我并和他人融洽相处，一种社会化；认识周围的世界寻求一种自己满意的生活方式；获得判断事物的道德准则和价值标准。题目观点达不到个人这种需要，更谈不上为社会做点什么。
（2）To know。获得全面的、基础的知识。为进一步的个人发展做好准备；为个人的需要提供一个选择的范围；个人灵感的来源。题目观点部分达到。
（3）To lead。适当开出一些培养兴趣的可称或者活动项目，但不是to meet，而是to lead。这种引导主要是两方面作用：培养个性人格；引发寻找未来事业的发展可能。但绝不是要把人变成某一领域的承载知识的有用的机器。
（4）现实的可行性。资源配置的问题；进而引发教育公平的问题。
教育要在保障公正和资源合理利用的情况下是学生认识自我和世界、拥有探索和世界的知识基础并找到自我发展的道路，这样的个人所结合成的社会更有和谐和解放的可能，这种对自我对社会都有益的教育才是真正有效的。

The true education, which chiefly means schooling education here, is built up for the purpose to enlighten, to know and to lead. Admittedly, the effectiveness of education should be measured by the achievement of the purpose, at the same time educational resources and equality also should be considered. Therefore, I think the speaker’ claim that truly effective education which should be specifically designed to meet individual would not be really effective, moreover it is negative for people and even society to develop comprehensively, as discussed below.

The first goal of education – to enlighten – requires some courses and good teachers which could help the students form their reasonable vision of world. That vision of world is vital for every student. Because it makes someone could gradually discover and know himself/herself and build a connection with others, which as the process of socialization forms the healthy self-identity and a basic living surroundings. Simultaneously, it provides some methods of thought which help one fine a satisfying lifestyle, and this lifestyle decides one how to live in his/her life. Still important, the vision of world suggests some moral principles and value standards which tell the student what is good, or what should be rejected. Clearly, these general necessary needs are difficult to be realized by the specifically designed education.

The second, in general education, schools can provide some common curriculum which could help to give students fundamental knowledge and skills. On the one hand, the abundant knowledge and skills are foundation for our students to grow up and become a informed, productive member of society; on the other hand, it provides a broad scope for students to choose and develop their specializations and let them find what are their real needs and interests, and it would even be the source of their inspirations in their own interests areas. Although the speaker’s claim could partly fulfill the goal of “to know”, this “to know” needs broad courses to transmit scientific and humanistic knowledge rather than specifically designed courses to meet the individual interests.

The third, “to lead” as one goal of education doesn’t mean to meet the individual over-specifically but to lead the individual advisably. The effective education has the responsibility to lead someone to his/her proper interesting areas with his/her potential capacity. For that, schools might provide diversified selected courses and some other programs - for example, a rural survey might make one begin to interest agronomy. Admittedly, that will help students find the goals of their careers and develop the ways to achieve them. In addition, diversified selected courses and some other programs will also prompt students’ characters which make them distinct from others, without specifically designed curriculum as the speaker worries and claims.

Finally, any practical conditions of the education are also important and should be considered. It is to require huge educational resources to assure the individuals have their own specifically designed curriculum; unfortunately, no state has so many educational resources, at least, today. If we are force to do so, it is inevitable to aggravate educational inequality which means students from wealthy family might have elite curriculum and ones whose families are in poverty might receive bad and rough curriculum. Hence the speaker’s claim seems a fantastic idea.

In sum, with disagreement to the speaker’ claim, I think the true effective education should provide students the abilities and methods to find themselves, to learn the broad knowledge and skills, and to develop their interest, at the same time distribute educational resources reasonably and equally.

lilumiluUID: 2332310

The true education, which chiefly means schooling education here, is built up for the purpose to enlighten, to know and to lead. Admittedly, the effectiveness of education should be measured by the achievement of the purpose, at the same time educational resources and equality also should be considered. Therefore, I think the speaker’ claim that truly effective education which should be specifically designed to meet individual would not be really effective, moreover it is negative for people and even society to develop comprehensively, as discussed below.(这里感觉语法是否可以改进，it指代的是claim还是后面的不定式，不太清楚。会被理解为：全面发展对人民，甚至社会都是不利的。)

The first goal of education – to enlighten – requires some courses and good teachers which could help the students form their reasonable vision of world. (世界观这个词这么用，我不知道对不对，但我感觉vision这个词一般指的都是眼睛看到的东西。)That vision of world is vital for every student. Because it makes someone could gradually discover and know himself/herself and build a connection with others, which as the process of socialization forms the healthy self-identity and a basic living surroundings. Simultaneously, it provides some methods of thought which help one fine(find?) a satisfying lifestyle, and this lifestyle decides one how to live in his/her life. Still important, the vision of world suggests some moral principles and value standards which tell the student what is good, or what should be rejected. Clearly, these general necessary needs are difficult to be realized by the specifically designed education.(我觉得应该是仅仅specifically designed education是不够的，应该有一些世界观的education，但lz的意思是specifically designed education很难培养到世界观，虽然二者意思差不多，但前者应该更完整吧。其实我认为specifically designed education本来就没打算培养世界观。。。。。Lz听一听就算了，呵呵)

The second, in general education, schools can provide some common curriculum which could help to give students fundamental knowledge and skills. On the one hand, the abundant knowledge and skills are foundation for our students to grow up and become a informed, productive member of society; on the other hand, it provides a broad scope for students to choose and develop their specializations and let them find what are their real needs and interests, and it would even be the source of their inspirations in their own interests areas. Although the speaker’s claim could partly fulfill the goal of “to know”, this “to know” needs broad courses to transmit scientific and humanistic knowledge rather than specifically designed courses to meet the individual interests.

The third, “to lead” as one goal of education doesn’t mean to meet the individual over-specifically but to lead the individual advisably. The effective education has the responsibility to lead someone to his/her proper interesting areas with his/her potential capacity. For that, schools might provide diversified selected courses and some other programs - for example, a rural survey might make one begin to interest agronomy. Admittedly, that will help students find the goals of their careers and develop the ways to achieve them. In addition, diversified selected courses and some other programs will also prompt students’ characters which make them distinct from others, without specifically designed curriculum as the speaker worries(不明白用这个的意思) and claims.

Finally, any practical conditions of the education are also important and should be considered. It is to require huge educational resources to assure the individuals have their own specifically designed curriculum; unfortunately, no state has so many educational resources, at least, today. If we are force(forced?) to do so, it is inevitable to aggravate educational inequality which means students from wealthy family might have elite curriculum and ones whose families are in poverty might receive bad and rough curriculum. Hence the speaker’s claim seems a fantastic idea.

三四五段没什么好说的

In sum, with disagreement to the speaker’s claim, I think the true effective education should provide students the abilities and methods to find themselves, to learn the broad knowledge and skills, and to develop their interest, at the same time distribute educational resources reasonably and equally.

以我的水平来看，lz的文章写得是很好的，特别是观点和思路非常值得学习。语言上，虽然有些地方觉得不够地道，但我也无法提出更好的表达。最后，提两个看法：
1, lz三段主要说得是enlight，know，lead，感觉就每段就一句提到了和specifically designed education不符，是否应该多联系一下，这个大家可以讨论。
2, 我觉得，教育的效率和平等是两个同一层面的东西，而不是平等隶属于效率，具体说就是，教育的平等并不是为效率服务的，而是自身要求的。比如最后一段the true effective education should distribute educational resources reasonably and equally. 这样说就值得商榷了，因为有时候为了distribute educational resources equally是需要ineffective education的。
个人意见，仅供参考。

guomin1437UID: 2411571

The true education, which chiefly means schooling education here,(感觉有臆断主题范围之嫌,here用的不好,换成in common sense如何呢?)  is built up for the purpose to enlighten, to know and to lead. Admittedly, the effectiveness of education should be measured by the achievement of the purpose, at the same time educational resources and equality also should be considered.(后一句的逻辑连贯性不强,为什么这二者就应该考虑,加个原因从句是不是更好一些,另外我一直以为at the same time不是连词,但是你在这个句子中没有使用其他连词,而且没有报错,请赐教) Therefore, I think(我感觉象I think 之类的东东最好少出现) the speaker’ claim that truly effective education which should be specifically designed to meet individual would not be really effective, moreover it is negative for people and even society to develop comprehensively,(上面的短句有点理解不了) as discussed below.
第一段感觉很不错,没有落入很俗套的开头模式,虽然平淡,但很有力度,就是结论这句没有看太懂,能不能再提炼一下

The first goal of education – to enlighten – requires some courses and good teachers which could help the students form their reasonable vision of world. That vision of world is vital for every student. Because it makes someone could(could要不要去掉) gradually discover and know himself/herself and build a connection with others, which as the process of socialization forms the healthy self-identity and a basic living surroundings. Simultaneously, it provides some methods of thought which help one fine a satisfying lifestyle, and this lifestyle decides one how to live in his/her life. Still important, the vision of world suggests some moral principles and value standards which tell the student what is good, or what should be rejected. Clearly, these general necessary needs are difficult to be realized by the specifically designed education.
本文你是反对观点,感觉应该说specially         education和education的比较差异,而不应该是对教育的目标的长篇讨论,你一直在说education的first goal,只有在最后对你反对的做了抨击,你认为呢?

The second, in general education, schools can provide some common curriculum which could help to give students fundamental knowledge and skills. On the one hand, the abundant knowledge and skills are foundation for our students to grow up and become a informed, productive member of society; on the other hand, it provides a broad scope for students to choose and develop their specializations and let them find what are their real needs and interests, and it would even be the source of their inspirations in their own interests areas. Although the speaker’s claim could partly fulfill the goal of “to know”, this “to know” needs broad courses to transmit scientific and humanistic knowledge rather than specifically designed courses to meet the individual interests.

The third, “to lead” as one goal of education doesn’t mean to meet the individual over-specifically but to lead the individual advisably. The effective education has the responsibility to lead someone to his/her proper interesting areas with his/her potential capacity. For that, schools might provide diversified selected courses and some other programs - for example, a rural survey might make one begin to interest agronomy. Admittedly, that will help students find the goals of their careers and develop the ways to achieve them. In addition, diversified selected courses and some other programs will also prompt students’ characters which make them distinct from others, without specifically designed curriculum as the speaker worries and claims.
以上三段个人感觉都和第一段一样的问题,不知道是我理解的问题,还是其他的原因

Finally, any practical conditions of the education are also important and should be considered. It is to require huge educational resources to assure the individuals have their own specifically designed curriculum; unfortunately, no state has so many educational resources, at least, today. If we are force to do so, it is inevitable to aggravate educational inequality which means students from wealthy family might have elite curriculum and ones whose families are in poverty might receive bad and rough curriculum. Hence the speaker’s claim seems a fantastic idea.
在总论点中有提到这一层意思吗

In sum, with disagreement to the speaker’ claim, I think the true effective education should provide students the abilities and methods to find themselves, to learn the broad knowledge and skills, and to develop their interest, at the same time distribute educational resources reasonably and equally.
可能是我理解的问题,总感觉 偏题了,但是语言确实很好,流畅而且长短有致