Issue150 [Jet小组]第五次作业

Silvan_luanUID: 2374352

ISSUE150 - "Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."

Thechnologes  are  always  changing, as the later ones apparently totally replace the earlier .There are handreds and thousands of instances in the section of Industry Revolution in the British Museum, such as the electronic defeated the tream ones .And another  viewpoint of vogue is that  because of the conveniency and the low cost , documentaries and  videos of  senary  in  televisions and computers  would  make the real  actul tourism obsolete . But it is increasingly proved that mot only   televsion and computer will hardly be a threat to tourism ,but also they ,in some dgree , they are a king of activators to attract people to take part in tourism.

One one hand , altough the images and the sounds in  vedieos and documentaries are attractive , the characteristic and special fun and interests of tourism are indispensable.Just like the efficiency and convenience of the  electronic engine could not replace the intersts and the fun of the shaking and hearing the whistle by travelling on the steamer trains, the images  and the videos also ould not help the viewer enjoying the smell of the winds along the beach or the tasts of the various food in different countries.Furthermore  the real tourism could assemble the persoms  from different places and brige the coulture gaps among each other and ,maybe, creat a dramatic friendship during the trip, which could not be suuplied by the watching videos by the TV set and internet.

One the other hand, sometimes the programs in the televisions and internet would stimulate the requirements to whom have never had a relevant experience.A good cae in point is the increasing income of the tourim advertisments on TV and internet, which is illustrated  by  a recent survey produced by the International Tourism Organization .In this survey , the cost of the broadcasting and producing for the tourism advertisments have tripled in the last five tears, while the number of the travellers in these publisized places of interests has increased more than 150 percents.Moreover, some travelling cooperations would like to suppley a mass of financial supports to the making of some nonprofits documentaries, because these programs could also be beneficial to the sales of the companies.

Admittedly , the widely spread of the tousim videos will take some pressure to the places of interests, because  the cooperations managing them need to supply more attractive service and travvling programs to the potential guests or they will not go out of the house for a real trip .And the publisizing will aggravate the  competetion among the different  landscapes .But all in all, the media such as Tv and internet still play a active role in to the tourism.

In sum , too mucn misgiving for the threats of medias to tourism  is redundant and useless, because the ups and downs are not decied by the medias but by wether the places of interests  in the future coudle give better  goods and service than in the past. And in this process, the media is generally indifferent.

michaelxuywUID: 2330197

Thechnologes  are  always  changing,as the later ones apparently totally replace the earlier .There are handredsand thousands of instances in the section of Industry Revolution in the BritishMuseum, such as the electronic defeated the tream ones .And another  viewpointof vogue is that  because of the conveniency and the low cost ,documentaries and  videosof  senary  in  televisions andcomputers  would  make the real  actul tourismobsolete . But it is increasingly proved that mot only   televsionand computer will hardly be a threat to tourism ,but also they ,in some dgree ,they are a king of activators to attract people to take part in tourism. (感觉表达论点时用的句型太复杂，使得论点不够明确，而且开头太长了)

One one hand , altough the images and the sounds in  vedieos anddocumentaries are attractive , the characteristic and special fun and interestsof tourism are indispensable （for the completeness ofa traveling）.Just like the efficiency and convenienceof the  electronic engine could not replace the intersts and the funof the shaking and hearing the whistle by travelling on the steamer trains, theimages  and the videos also ould not help the viewer enjoying thesmell of the winds along the beach or the tasts of the various food indifferent countries. Furthermore  the real tourism could assemble thepersoms  from different places and brige the coulture gaps among eachother and ,maybe, creat a dramatic friendship during the trip, which could notbe suuplied by the watching videos by the TV set and internet.

One the other hand, sometimes the programs in the televisions and internetwould stimulate the requirements to whom have never had a relevant experience.Agood cae in point is the increasing income of the tourim advertisments on TVand internet, which is illustrated  by  a recent surveyproduced by the International Tourism Organization .In this survey , the costof the broadcasting and producing for the tourism advertisments have tripled inthe last five tears, while the number of the travellers in these publisizedplaces of interests has increased more than 150 percents.Moreover, some travellingcooperations would like to suppley a mass of financial supports to the makingof some nonprofits documentaries, because these programs could also bebeneficial to the sales of the companies.（本段的分论点是节目能够激发人们去旅游，而举的例子是旅游公司增加了广告的投入，缺少进一步认证，感觉说服力不足）

Admittedly , the widely spread of the tousim videos will take some pressure tothe places of interests, because  the cooperations managing them needto supply more attractive service and travvling programs to the potentialguests or they will not go out of the house for a real trip .And thepublisizing will aggravate the  competetion among thedifferent  landscapes .But all in all, the media such as Tv andinternet still play a active role in to the tourism.（不太明白这段的意思）

In sum , too mucn misgiving for the threats of medias to tourism  isredundant and useless, because the ups and downs are not decied by the mediasbut by wether （用whether让文章的立场不够坚定，而且文中也没有论述如果景点无力提供优质服务结果会怎样）the places of interests  in the future coudle givebetter  goods and service than in the past. And in this process, themedia is generally indifferent.（结尾应该再一次摆出论点，即旅游业是不会过时的。）

文章的论点在开头表述得不直接而且太长，在结尾处表达的意思不明确；第三段中的举得例子有些勉强；另外，句型和用词显得太随意，拼写错误较多（可能是因为限时）。一些拙见，希望对楼主有益。

PS：为什么we,you,I不能多用呢？

[ 本帖最后由 michaelxuyw 于 2008-2-14 00:30 编辑 ]