Issue130【火箭 小组】第二次作业

lfj1865UID: 2413050

The author actually consists of two claims. First, the future of society is determined by the children who are socialized today. Second, we have not yet learned to raise children who can bring about a better society. I disagree with the author's opinion.

It is no denying that how children are socialized is indispensable to the destiny of our society. Socialization of children is one of the most important means by which children can learn how to enter and adept to a society, and learn to be cooperative, accommodating, responsible. These basic skills have great benefits not only for children’s future but also for our society which place much stress on communication skills. Children’s communication skills affect the development of cooperation in scientific research, environment protection, economy and trade in the future. If children do not master this skills, it impede the development of society.

Even though socialization is crucial for our world, it is not the only one factor that determines the destiny of our society. Children who just master this communication skills without learning enough knowledge do harm to society. Besides socialization, a multitude of factors determines the future of society such as scientific levels, innovation and so on. For example, President Roosvelte was not well socialized due to disability when he was young. But he developed reforms and projects known as the New Deal. Under his sagacious leadership, America successfully walked out the shadow of Depression and conquered the notorious fascism in the Second World War.

Currently, there are indeed a host of problems in our educational systems such as recitation without understanding the materials, over competition among students, moreover, great perspectives and skills are not completely absorbed by children. Education system needs to be developed. School education neglect communication ability including skills, attitude, methods, and over emphasize on reasoning, logical thinking and grades. This leads to children are not well socialized. Family education also has such problems. Parents do not tell children the importance of cooperation, communication with others, but encourage them to compete and win. Modern education should give much thought to how to educate children with enough ability before they inter a society. This not only makes much sense to children's growth but also social stability.

In sum, how children are socialized is indispensable to the future of our society, but it is not the only one factor that determine our societal destiny. Modern education should provide more opportunity for children to close contact with society before they enter it.  

[ 本帖最后由 liyue24 于 2008-6-11 22:34 编辑 ]

leanneqiuUID: 2463430

Issue 130【火箭 小组】第二次作业
The author actually consists of (expresses) two claims. First, the future of society is determined by the children who are socialized today. Second, we have not yet learned to raise children who can bring about a better society. I disagree with the author's opinions.

It is no denying that how children are socialized is indispensable to the destiny of our society. Socialization of children is one of the most important means by which children can learn how to enter and adept (adapt) to a society, and learn to be cooperative, accommodating and responsible. These basic skills not only 放这好点have great benefits not only for children’s future but also for our society which place much stress on communication skills (since our society place much stress on communication). Children’s communication skills affect the development（efficiency） of cooperation in scientific research, environmental protection, economy and trade in the future. If children do not master this these skills, it will impede the development of society. （这段有点乱，句式和词汇上错误较多，楼主要多注意）

Even though socialization is crucial for our world, it is not the only one删掉 factor that determines the destiny of our society. Children who just master this these communication skills without learning enough knowledge will do harm to society. Besides socialization, a multitude of factors determines单数 the future of society such as scientific levels, innovation and so on. For example, President Roosvelte was not well socialized due to disability when he was young. But he developed reforms and projects known as the New Deal. Under his sagacious leadership, America successfully walked out the shadow of Depression and conquered the notorious fascism in the Second World War. （例子不错）

Currently, there are indeed a host of problems in our educational systems such as recitation without understanding the materials, over competition among students, moreover, great perspectives and skills are not completely absorbed by children. Education system needs to be developed. School education neglects communication ability including skills, attitude, methods, and over emphasizing on reasoning, logical thinking and grades. This leads to children’s are删 not well socialized. Family education also has such problems. Parents do not tell children the importance of cooperation, communication with others, but encourage them to compete and win. Modern education should give much thought（ consideration ）to how to educate children with enough ability before they inter （enter into） a society. This not only makes much sense to children's growth but also social stability.(这段完全在论述，没有例子，句子很??拢?芯趺皇裁茨谌菥图妇浠八道此等サ?

In sum, how children are socialized is indispensable to the future of our society, but it is not the only one factor that determines our societal destiny. Modern education should provide more opportunity 复数for children to close contact with society before they enter into it.
结构还算清楚，不过小错很多，论证不够powerful缺乏例子，好友楼主跟我一样基本功不好，多练练吧，一起加油！

[ 本帖最后由 leanneqiu 于 2008-6-10 23:31 编辑 ]

lfj1865UID: 2413050

呵呵，谢啦！真的要好好努力了！一起加油:)

byysUID: 2294038

在上面的基础上修改。
The author actually consists of (expresses) two claims. First, the future of society is determined by the children who are socialized today. Second, we have not yet learned to raise children who can bring about a better society. I disagree with the author's opinions.
我觉得完全反对，没有让步会影响分数
It is no denying that how children are socialized is indispensable to the destiny of our society. Socialization of children is one of the most important means by which children can learn how to enter and adept (adapt) to a society, and learn to be cooperative, accommodating and responsible. These basic skills not only 放这好点have great benefits not only for children’s future but also for our society which place much stress on communication skills (since our society place much stress on communication). Children’s communication skills affect the development（efficiency） of cooperation in scientific research, environmental protection, economy and trade in the future. If children do not master this these skills, it will impede the development of society.
B1
Even though socialization is crucial for our world, it is not the only one删掉factor that determines the destiny of our society. Children who just master this these communication skills without learning enough knowledge will do harm to society. Besides socialization, a multitude of factors determines单数 the future of society such as scientific levels, innovation and so on. For example, President Roosvelte Roosevelt was not well socialized due to disability when he was young. But he developed reforms and projects known as the New Deal. Under his sagacious leadership, America successfully walked out the shadow of Depression and conquered the notorious fascism in the Second World War. （例子不错）
B2
Currently, there are indeed a host of problems in our educational systems such as recitation without understanding the materials, over competition among students, moreover, great perspectives and skills are not completely absorbed by children. Education system needs to be developed. School education neglects communication ability including skills, attitude, methods, and over emphasizing on reasoning, logical thinking and grades. This leads to children’s are删 not well socialized. Family education also has such problems. Parents do not tell children the importance of cooperation, communication with others, but encourage them to compete and win. Modern education should give much thought（ consideration ）to how to educate children with enough ability before they inter （enter into） a society. This not only makes much sense to children's growth but also social stability.(这段完全在论述，没有例子，句子很??拢?芯趺皇裁茨谌菥图妇浠八道此等サ?/font])
B3
In sum, how children are socialized is indispensable to the future of our society, but it is not the only one factor that determines our societal destiny. Modern education should provide more opportunity 复数for children to close contact with society before they enter into it.

基本错误，楼上已经指出来了。我和leanneqiu看法一致，文章缺乏例子。第一段因为有例子，就显得要有说服力很多。看了这么多大家写的，觉得观点基本都差不多，写出来也感觉没有什么差别，可能就是在于例子上面。文章有隐含一个前提，是我们没有掌握好的方法来教育小孩社会化。在讨论B3时，还是可以在这方面作些讨论。