argument185【0906G ANap Hand 作文互改小组】第五次作业 by cynthia219

cynthia219UID: 2465245

argument185【0906G ANap Hand 作文互改小组】第5次作业 By cynthia219


In this argument, the speaker assumes that if they take actions,for example, to restrict the water flow to approximately 1/3 of its original force, their profits would increase further. As a matter of fact, there are several fallacy as it stands.

In the first place, it is obvious that the fact about lower water force does not equal to a savings in water usage, not mention to a “considerable savings”, for Sunnyside Corporation. In the absence of sufficient evidence, it is totally possible that the usage in per minutes is lower at the expense of longer service time. If this is the case, the fluctuation of water-payment is still in doubt. Thus, We cannot get a conclusion about whether the payment of water would decrease.

Even if the lower water force would lead to a savings, it does not follow that there would be a increase profit in the future. Although the speaker noticed that no proplems with showers have been reported since the adjustment, except for a few complaints, it does not mean that no problems occurred. Maybe there are some abnormal condition, but no one have reported them to related institution. It is also possible that residents there think no one care about their compaints so they would like rather to choose a new place to live, instead of useless compaints. If the speaker cannot rule out these possibilities, we can not be convinced.

Last but not least, the speaker seems to live under the illusion that if the company can reduce expend, the company can gain more profit without any doubt. But this is not the case. Common sense tells us that profit is determinined on the expend and income. No one can draw a conclusion about an increased profit in the term of less expend.  Only by weighting the expend and income, we can know the exact information about the profit. Therefore, without evidence about the larger margin between the expend and income, the conclusion in this argument is still poor.

So far as I am concerned, in order to support this conclusion, we need more detailed information. First, the arguer should prove that lower water pressure would not lead to longer service time. Second, the arguer should also convince us that the action can not exert a negative influence on the customers. Third, it is also a necessity to inform us that there also would be a moderate income to ensure an increased profit. Only in this way can we believe the conclusion in the argument.

irvine666UID: 2575525

In this argument, the speaker assumes that if they(指代不明) take actions,for example, to restrict the water flow to approximately 1/3 of its original force, their profits would increase further. As a matter of fact, there are several fallacy（单复数） as it stands.

In the first place, it is obvious that the fact about（多余的词完全可以去掉） lower water force does not equal to a savings in water usage, not mention to a “considerable savings”, for Sunnyside Corporation（这句话本身用词不当，mention to 是提起的意思，另外和前面一句话衔接不上，not..not表并列而非你文中递进的意思）. In the absence of sufficient evidence, it is totally possible that the usage in per minutes is lower at the expense of longer service time. If this is the case, the fluctuation of water-payment is still in doubt. Thus, We cannot get a conclusion about whether the payment of water would decrease.

Even if the lower water force would lead to a savings, it does not follow that there would be a increase profit in the future. Although the speaker noticed that no proplems with showers have been reported since the adjustment, except for a few complaints, it does not mean that no problems occurred. Maybe there are some abnormal condition, but no one have reported them to related institution. It is also possible that residents there think no one care about their compaints so they would like rather to choose a new place to live, instead of useless compaints. If the speaker cannot rule out these possibilities, we can not be convinced.（这段不错）

Last but not least, the speaker seems to live under the illusion that if the company can reduce expend（expending）, (少个thus或者therefore)the company can gain more profit without any doubt. But this is not the case. Common sense tells us that profit is determinined on the expend and income. (前后因果关系，加连词比如so)No one can draw a conclusion about an increased profit in the term of less expend.  Only by weighting the expend and income, we can know the exact information about the profit. Therefore, without evidence about the larger margin between the expend and income, the conclusion in this argument is still poor.（有poor conclusion这种说法么？）

So far as I am concerned, in order to support this conclusion, we need more detailed information. First, the arguer should prove that lower water pressure would not lead to longer service time. Second, the arguer should also convince us that the action can not exert a negative influence on the customers. Third, it is also a necessity to inform us that there also would be a moderate income to ensure an increased profit. Only in this way can we believe the conclusion in the argument.