【12月-1月IBT综合备考活动】之【TWE写作】1月3日作业

xiaobin87UID: 2587752

     What’s the meaning of the word ‘friend’? Different people interpret it in various ways. Some one believes that friend is the person who can add colors to your life. They must be humorous and active person, helping you out of the tedious and boring life. Others, like me, claim that we should make friends with those who’re wiser than us, or bring sound solutions to us when we’re in troubles.
     Dating back to the pre historical age when the living condition was so harsh that human realized they can’t survive without the help of friends. So they manage to find clever guy to create allies in order to conquest the nature, which lead to the formation of clans and tribes. With the accumulation of wisdom through the fought against nature and enemies, human beings became more and more confident in dealing with the disasters around them. They and their wise friends form an ally that can overcome any problems in their life. It is in this belief that human histories move forward, that the concept of the collaborations was born, and that the clans or tribes evolve to a point where the cities emerge and the human civilization develop. Imagine the circumstance where everyone works individually, depending on their own intelligence to lead their life, what is the consequence? I can bet that the human race would extinct long time ago. They died of their ignorance and incapability if they don’t unit as a whole, accumulating their wisdom to fight against nature and other races living in the planet.
      Let us talk about our present life. It is widely accepted that nowadays the problems around us are overwhelming no matter you’re kid or adult, citizen or leader. We increasingly find the importance of friends; those shrewd ones who can help us create our business or at least tackle with the boring stuffs entangling us. In China there is a famous enterpriser named Yu who create a renowned English training school, known as new oriental school. At the beginning of his career, he is so humble that have to attach advertisements on the poles at the street corner in person to make the school known by public. It makes little progress in his business where so little people sign up in the school. He is desperate and about to close the school when his several friends in college, returned from abroad, go to help him. These are clever guys with master even PHD degrees who infuse inspiration to the school. They’re assigned to take responsibilities in different fields in the operation of the school. They work as a team, dedicating to the school, which gradually accepted by public. With the painstaking efforts of Yu and his intelligent friends, the school has already become the biggest English training school with millions of students receiving the programs in China.
      To conclude, wise friends are blessing to us, because they bring precious ideas and assistances to us. Maybe you’re fond of humorous persons who can make you happy, I’d rather make friends with wise men who can bring me more significant thing than laughers, and it is the wisdom.

Amber0926UID: 2555355

通读一下感觉语言不错，词汇丰富&variety，结构紧密举例也挺细致
只是很多口语话的东西尽量不要出现，eg. guy kid。。。
有点困了，明天再好好评下

xlwxxyUID: 2568970

What’s the meaning of the word ‘friend’? Different people interpret it in various ways. Some one believes that friend is the person who can add colors to your life. They must be humorous and active person, helping you out of the tedious and boring life. Others, like me, claim that we should make friends with those who’re wiser than us, or bring sound solutions to us when we’re in troubles.

     Dating back to the pre historical age when the living condition was so harsh that human realized they can’t survive without the help of friends. So they manage to find clever guy to create allies in order to conquest the nature, which lead to the formation of clans and tribes. With the accumulation of wisdom through the fought against nature and enemies, human beings became more and more confident in dealing with the disasters around them. They and their wise friends form an ally that can overcome any problems in their life. It is in this belief that human histories move forward, that the concept of the collaborations was born, and that the clans or tribes evolve to a point where the cities emerge and the human civilization develop. Imagine the circumstance where everyone works individually, depending on their own intelligence to lead their life, what is the consequence? I can bet that the human race would extinct long time ago. They died of their ignorance and incapability if they don’t unit as a whole, accumulating their wisdom to fight against nature and other races living in the planet.

      Let us talk about our present life. It is widely accepted that nowadays the problems around us are overwhelming no matter you’re kid or adult, citizen or leader. We increasingly find the importance of friends; those shrewd ones who can help us create our business or at least tackle with the boring stuffs entangling us. In China there is a famous enterpriser named Yu who create a renowned English training school, known as new oriental school. At the beginning of his career, he is so humble that have to attach advertisements on the poles at the street corner in person to make the school known by public. It makes little progress in his business where so little people sign up in the school. He is desperate and about to close the school when his several friends in college, returned from abroad, go to help him. These are clever guys with master even PHD degrees who infuse inspiration to the school. They’re assigned to take responsibilities in different fields in the operation of the school. They work as a team, dedicating to the school, which gradually accepted by public. With the painstaking efforts of Yu and his intelligent friends, the school has already become the biggest English training school with millions of students receiving the programs in China.

To conclude, wise friends are blessingbenedictive to us, because they bring precious ideas and assistances to us. Maybe you’re fond of humorous persons who can make you happy, I’d rather make friends with wise men who can bring me more significant things than laughers, and it is the wisdom.

首尾点题不错.
注意加强用词.

xiaobin87UID: 2587752

...........................    你的点评够简练  很好