Issue121 FLY AW作业组

kckUID: 2214868

第一次超时这么少..不容易啊,大家多指正
TOPIC: ISSUE121 - "At various times in the geological past, many species have become extinct as a result of natural, rather than human, processes. Thus, there is no justification for society to make extraordinary efforts, especially at a great cost in money and jobs, to save endangered species."
WORDS: 499          TIME: 0:55:00          DATE: 2006-5-29
提纲:
1.物种灭绝确实是正常的现象
2.但是,我们可以发现,由于人类的活动,物种灭绝的更快,更严重了.如果我们不采取措施,物种将会越来越少
3.此外,由于物种之间相互的紧切联系,其他物种的灭绝可能会导致人类的危机
4.至于,到什么程度,我觉得只要我们能够保证我们的生存和发展,就应该全力去
    The speaker asserts that we human do not need to take great emphases in saving endangered species for many species have extincted as a result of natural,rather than human,processes.I agree insofar with the speaker that the extinct of species is a natural process to some extent. However, the speaker ignores some negative effects that human has brought to other species , which are especially severe in modem world.
      It is reasonable for us to understand that some species extincted naturally under the famous Darwin's law of natural selection. The true process of species's evolvement also demonstrates this point of view. Any people with basic biology knowledge would find that lots of species has been extincted in the process of evolvement due to their disability to adjust to the environment around them; And some species even extincted before human beings dominated this planet. In a word, the extinct of species is a natural and common phenomena in this world.
     However, as we human has dominated earth since a long time ago, our activities has influenced other subordinate species around us more and more severely due to our development, which lead a more fast  speed of extinct than that in the past . We have destroyed the environment that many species, which include ourselves too, rely on to survive. For example, as we want more land for farming or living and more wood for construction or manufacturing papers, less and less forests  exist in this world now. Then many animals become short of foods and activity space. Moreover, as we want to acquire more resources from certain animals, we killed them even faster than its pace to breed .Then these animals are becoming fewer and fewer. As a result, we can find that many species disappeared quickly in modem word. In a sum, if we do not take necessary measures, more and more species would be extinct quickly and finally we may be the only species in this planet.
  The other reason that I advocate that we should make efforts to save endangered species is that our animal kingdom is a complex matrix of interdependent relationship. Any species may affect many other species's survival and it may also depend on many other species to keep live in the world. Then certain species' s extinct may cause several other species to be extinct and finally damage ourselves' survival. Though this point might sound overstate to some, environment experts and biologists assure us that this is quite possible in long term.
  However, as to the question to what extent should we save the endangered species, the answer may be clear to most people. If we can assure our survival and development, why we don’t pay more attention to the endangered animals? More and more people are interested in species protecting can illustrate this point.
   In sum , to save these endangered animals is necessary for us and we should pay as much attention as we can to this problems. Anyway, this planet does not only belong to our human being. The diversity of species may be necessary to ensure the prosperity in our world.

zqznedUID: 2114587

提前交的作业啊，明天写过来看

zqznedUID: 2114587

The speaker asserts that we human do not need to take great emphases in saving endangered species for many species have extinct as a result of natural,rather than human,processes.I agree insofar with the speaker that the extinct of species is a natural process to some extent. However, the speaker ignores some negative effects that human has brought to other species , which are especially severe in modem world.
      It is reasonable for us to understand that some species extincted naturally under the famous Darwin's law of natural selection. The true process of species's evolvement also demonstrates this point of view. Any people with basic biology knowledge would find that lots of species has been extincted in the process of evolvement due to their disability to adjust to the environment around them; and some species even extincted before human beings dominated this planet. In a word, the extinct of species is a natural and common phenomena in this world.
     However, as we human has dominated earth since a long time ago, our activities has influenced other subordinate species around us more and more severely due to our development, which lead a more fast  speed of extinct than that in the past . We have destroyed the environment that many species, which include ourselves too, rely on to survive. For example, as we want more land for farming or living and more wood for construction or manufacturing papers, less and less forests  exist in this world now. Then many animals become short of foods and activity space. Moreover, as we want to acquire more resources from certain animals, we killed them even faster than its pace to breed .Then these animals are becoming fewer and fewer. As a result, we can find that many species disappeared quickly in modem word. In a sum, if we do not take necessary measures, more and more species would be extinct quickly and finally we may be the only species in this planet.
  The other reason that I advocate that we should make efforts to save endangered species is that our animal kingdom is a complex matrix of interdependent relationship. Any species may affect many other species's survival and it may also depend on many other species to keep live in the world. Then certain species' s extinct may cause several other species to be extinct and finally damage ourselves' survival. Though this point might sound overstate to some, environment experts and biologists assure us that this is quite possible in long term.
  However, as to the question to what extent should we save the endangered species, the answer may be clear to most people. If we can assure our survival and development, why we don’t pay more attention to the endangered animals? More and more people are interested in species protecting can illustrate this point.
   In sum , to save these endangered animals is necessary for us and we should pay as much attention as we can to this problems. Anyway, this planet does not only belong to our human being. The diversity of species may be necessary to ensure the prosperity in our world.
写得不错，有一些小的语法错误。
个人认为第三段论证例证感觉很好，第五段看的有点晕，没有反应应到什么程度。
感觉方式和方法很象北美

flycc28UID: 2164453

根楼上的感觉一样第三段论证的比较充分，但是句子的结构安排还要更丰富一些...这个很难的说 呵呵

kckUID: 2214868

呵呵..自己想不出来
就是按照北美那个思路来的

至于第5段..是写完了后才突然发现题目中还说了:effort之类的东西
然后就加了点..但是这点确实写的不着边际!
其实我后来也感觉不加更好

renhongrenhongUID: 2192156

Your statement is reasonable.However, there are severe grammatical defects in your issue  ,in my opinion ,to the guy to join  GRE,especially the ones that are related to the structures of sentences.Hence, you should pay more attention .Besides,the whole structure of your essay is a little confusing due to the fifth paragragh.The conj."however" has been used in the third  part,and the meaning is not very clear.It's only the points from my own perspective,therefore you can adopt or abandon it.

[ 本帖最后由 renhongrenhong 于 2006-5-30 22:28 编辑 ]