Issue10[黄金十二宫白羊]第四次作业

asong2004UID: 2178054

TOPIC: ISSUE10 - "Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive, because it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated."
WORDS:488         TIME:这个这个大概三个小时吧，嗯离目标还远得很。。。
The author  asserts that because of a nation's cultural traditions are primarily preserved and generated in cities, the cities must receive the financial support they need for the sake of thriving.At the first glance, this opinion seems to be somewhat appealing, but further reflection tells me that I cannot agree with it for the following reasons.
To begin with, a nation's cultural traditions are rarely preserved in big city. On the contrary, They are always reserved in rural village. The metropolis is always so new and developing that it lacks sufficient to form its own cultural traditions. Or a metropolis expanded from a town having long history has been corroded by exterior dregs in the meanwhile it develop itself by opening to the outside world. For example, the Spring Festival is the most important festival for the Chinese people just like Christmas in the West. During the Spring Festival, many customs such as pasting New Year paintings, set offing firecrackers, lion dance, strolling exhibit of lanterns, offering sacrifices to one's ancestors and so on can be observed in some impoverished and remote villages. The residents of a city seem them outmoded and feudal. Shen Zhen composed of immigrants is an chinese metropolis . The overwhelming majority of citizen are young who are short of knowledge of nation's traditional culture. Though the economy developed fastly in twenty years, it has not formed a cultural tradition. If you want to study a nation's cultural traditions, you should process within villages having retaining conventions.
Admittedly, a nation's cultural traditions are generated in cities. As though one's body, cultural traditions need fresh factors to maintain vigor. Many international metropolis have advantage of assimilating of foreign essences. For instance , New York is an economical and cultural centre where lots of culture converge. American cultural traditions have been changed and influenced unobtrusively and imperceptibly.
Finally, compared with major cities, rural villages need more financial support . Only satisfy major cities will cause the gap between the rich and poor. The citizen become not familiar with peasant's customs even look down upon them so that many old customs have died out. Furthermore, the community will get boded down in confilct between city and village. Similar problem happened im many countries such as India, England and so on. According to an United Nations Development Programmer's report, the speed of expanding poverty gap  became highest in China in twenty years because of neglecting villages. Many social convention disappeared and social contradiction aggravated. The government has realized this problem and carried out Envelopment of the West Regions and project hope  to solve it. Now, we happily found  that the state of affair has improved in virtue of assisting poor village.
In conclusion, I hope it has been shown that both positive and negative effects among persons call for a balance in which developing majors cities and others .So that nation's cultural traditions are well preserved and generated.

渡渡鸟UID: 145880

The author  asserts that because of a nation's cultural traditions are primarily preserved and generated in cities, the cities must receive the financial support they need for the sake of thriving.At the first glance, this opinion seems to be somewhat appealing, but further reflection tells me that I cannot agree with it for the following reasons.
（开头写的比较简洁，但怎么觉得象是写A的开头啊。。。）

To begin with, a nation's cultural traditions are rarely preserved in big city. (标点)On the contrary, They （大小写。。。）are always reserved in rural village. The metropolis is always so new and developing that it lacks sufficient to form its own cultural traditions. Or a metropolis expanded from a town having long history has been corroded by exterior dregs in the meanwhile it develop itself by opening to the outside world. For example, the Spring Festival is the most important festival for the Chinese people just like Christmas in the West. During the Spring Festival, many customs such as pasting New Year paintings, set offing firecrackers, lion dance, strolling exhibit of lanterns, offering sacrifices to one's ancestors and so on can be observed in some impoverished and remote villages. The residents of a city seem them outmoded and feudal. Shen Zhen composed of immigrants is an （an？？？）chinese metropolis . The overwhelming majority of citizen are young who are short of knowledge of nation's traditional culture. Though the economy developed fastly in twenty years, it has not formed a cultural tradition. If you want to study a nation's cultural traditions, you should process within villages having retaining conventions. （Spring Festival的例子恰当么）

Admittedly, a nation's cultural traditions are generated in cities. As though one's body, cultural traditions need fresh factors to maintain vigor. Many international metropolis have advantage of assimilating of foreign essences. For instance , New York is an economical and cultural centre（拼写。。。） where lots of culture converge. American cultural traditions have been changed and influenced unobtrusively and imperceptibly.

Finally, compared with major cities, rural villages need more financial support . Only satisfy major cities will cause the gap between the rich and poor. The citizen become not familiar with peasant's customs even look down upon them so that many old customs have died out. Furthermore, the community will get boded down in conflict between city and village. Similar problem happened im（。。。。） many countries such as India, England and so on. According to an United Nations Development Programmer's report, the speed of expanding poverty gap  became highest in China in twenty years because of neglecting villages. Many social convention disappeared and social contradiction aggravated. The government has realized this problem and carried out Envelopment of the West Regions and project hope  to solve it. Now, we happily found  that the state of affair has improved in virtue of assisting poor village.

In conclusion, I hope it has been shown that both positive and negative effects among persons call for a balance in which developing majors cities and others .So that nation's cultural traditions are well preserved and generated.

好的方面我就不列了
缺点：
文章列出的具体例子感觉深度不够
拼写错误太多，以后写完一定先又贴到word自己先改一下
写作格式不对：开头定格写，两段中间要空一行的。
另外以后交作文时要附上文章提纲，方便改。