【12月-1月IBT综合备考活动】之【TWE写作】yxx 12月7日作业

yxx19870504UID: 2404670

Topic: People who do not work because they have enough money are rarely happy        

It's been argued for decades what triggers happiness. Some argue that the rich are actually unhappy account for no work to do. However, I am prone to judge them on a case-by-case basis.

Notwithstanding I concede that one might feel aimless and boring if he has nothing to do. Happiness might spring from diverse realms and work or assignment engaged is one of these factors inducing individual's positive emotions like happiness. In psychology, when one has something to do, he will be less likely to focus on trivial, and to save his cognitive resource, one would not easily magnify his negative emotions. Work, in some sense, is capable of freeing individuals from ill temper.

How do people feel happy? Mentally, the answer varies in a wide range according to kinds of personalities. My father, for example, gains pleasure from work. Despite how wealthy they are, the individuals of this personality are unable to be satisfied without work. They have high achievement motivations which drive them to chase happiness in non-stop work. Hence, it's my contention that ones like workaholics would never be happy until they work even if having accumulated enough money.

On contrast, psychologists define materialism as the belief that to regard happiness as owning materials like money. Materialists enjoy their lives filled with sufficient materials and Working is just a path to obtain material but not produce happiness. It’s material not job pleasing them. Indeed, comparing with those have to apply themselves assiduously to earning money, most of people felicitate the wealth, following private space and free will. Lots of people are satisfied and feel happy for lacking for nothing.

All in all, in an age when any motive or value is possible, it would be narrow-minded in the extreme to ridicule these attempts to find out people are seldom happy only because they have no work.

jackallen0714UID: 2510951

It's been argued for decades on what triggers happiness. 前后两句貌似没什么联系 Some argue that the rich are actually unhappy account for no work to do. However, I am prone to judge them on a case-by-case basis.

Notwithstanding I concede that one might feel aimless and boring if he has nothing to do. Happiness might spring from diverse realms and work or assignment engaged is one of these factors inducing individual's positive emotions like happiness.这句很长，我没怎么看懂…… In psychology, when one has something to do, he will be less likely to focus on trivial 词性, and to save从逻辑上来看这应该是原因吧，建议改为by saving his cognitive resource, one would not easily magnify his negative emotions. Work, in some sense, is capable of freeing individuals from ill temper.

How do people feel happy? Mentally, the answer varies in a wide range according to kinds of personalities. My father, for example, gains pleasure from work. Despite how wealthy they前面说的my father，这儿突然变成they，缺少点过渡，建议加一句：对于很多人来说也是一样 are, the individuals of this personality are unable to be satisfied without work. They have high achievement motivations which drive them to chase happiness in non-stop work. Hence, it's my contention that ones like workaholics would never be happy until they work even if having accumulated enough money.

On contrast, psychologists define materialism as the belief that to 多余 regard happiness as owning materials like money. Materialists enjoy their lives filled with sufficient materials and Working is just a path to obtain material but not produce happiness. It’s 单数名词不能单独存在 material not job pleasing please就可以了 them. Indeed, comparing with those have to apply themselves assiduously to earning money, most of people felicitate the wealth, following private space and free will. Lots of people are satisfied and feel happy for lacking for nothing.
好复杂的理论……理科生看不懂……


All in all, in an age when any motive or value is possible, it would be narrow-minded in the extreme to ridicule these attempts to find out people are seldom happy only because they have no work.

个人意见：
缺少TS，让人不能很快的看明白想表达什么
阐述的理论貌似太艰深了，TOEFL不是学术报告，没必要这么专业……关键是没有个浅显的例子来说明下
恩，还有些小错误要注意

xiaojing1115UID: 2578357

Topic: People who do not work because they have enough money are rarely happy        

It's been argued for decades what triggers happiness. Some argue that the rich are actually unhappy account for no work to do. However, I am prone to judge them on a case-by-case basis.

Notwithstanding I concede that one might feel aimless and boring if he has nothing to do. Happiness might spring from diverse realms and work or assignment engaged is one of these factors inducing individual's positive emotions like happiness. (没有看明白。。。。:) )In psychology, when one has something to do, he will be less likely to focus on trivial（trivia）, and to （重新成句It will）save his cognitive resource,（then） one would not easily magnify his negative emotions. Work, in some sense, is capable of freeing individuals from ill temper.

How do people feel happy? Mentally, the answer varies in a wide range according to kinds of personalities. My father, for example, gains pleasure from work. Despite how wealthy they are, the individuals of this personality are unable to be satisfied without work. They have high achievement motivations which drive them to chase happiness in non-stop work. Hence, it's my contention that ones like workaholics would never be happy until they work even if having accumulated enough money.
最后这句工作狂的论证貌似和题目没有太大关系吧，你要说的是不工作的不快乐
On contrast, psychologists define materialism as the belief that to regard （regarding）happiness as owning materials like money. Materialists enjoy their lives filled with sufficient materials and Working is just a path to obtain material but not produce happiness. It’s material not job pleasing them. Indeed, comparing with those （who）have to apply themselves assiduously to earning money, most of people felicitate the wealth, following private space and free will. Lots of people are satisfied and feel happy for lacking for （of）nothin
tAll in all, in an age when any motive or value is possible, it would be narrow-minded in the extreme to ridicule these attempts to find out people are seldom happy only because they have no work.

有一些小小的语法错误，条理不是很清晰，建议先写好提纲在开始写