issue150 旅游是否会过时 同主题写作，大家来狂拍啊！

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Issue150  第1篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：45分3秒     571 words
从2005年7月8日23时18分到2005年7月9日0时45分
------题目------
Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete.
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Will the tourism become obsolete as the television and worldwide computer connections make people become familiar with a lot of places which they have never visited? I strongly disagree. In my view, also these media can make us get to know some knowledge about the scenes, it cannot make us become familiar with them, and cannot replace the position of tourism. What is more, they serve as the channels to attract us to new places, and make our trips more convenient.

It is undeniable that the television and worldwide computer have brought a electronic storm and connection revolution. With these developed media, people can know more about the world, and the world is going to be a global country. Nowadays, we can sit before the television or the computer, enjoying the great scenes which are miles away. However, this cannot replace the position of the tourism, for what we face is only a plane, but not the solid scenes. Perhaps the pictures in the plane are vivid, but we cannot fully feel the beauty of nature and humanity. For example, when we climb a mountain, we can make friends from other places, feel the spirit of conquering, and get a satisfaction of success after reach to the top. Standing on the top of the mountain, we can inspire the fresh air, overlook to the countries and forests in the base, and enjoy the bask of the sunshine, the smell of flowers, all of which can only be imaged when we sit before the computer and television. In this sense, these media can only serve as way of finding out interesting places, but to become familiar with new places, we can only go there by ourselves.

Moreover, people go to tourism not only want to know something about it, but to relax themselves and flee away from the busy and burdensome daily work for a while. As nowadays people become less interesting in the common pastime such as parties, shopping, and so on, they need other things to recall the spirit and refresh themselves. So they choose tourism, which surely cannot be replaced by clicking mouse and browsing before the computer. In this sense, unless people do not want to refresh themselves and indulge in the quotidian life, the tourism will never be obsolete.

In fact, while the television and computer cannot replace the tourism, they even serve as propaganda and facilities of such activities. First, as people learn the attraction about these scenes, they rouse the eager to visit there. Take me as an example, when I saw the beautiful and interesting scene of Disney Park in America, I swore that there would be a day that I went there, which urges me to be harder to achieve my goal. Second, through the television and computer, we can select the place we want to go most, and get the latest information about the hostels and admission fees about the scenes, so to manage our trip more convenient. We can even book the hotels and join in the local travel agency ahead of time. With this information about the scenes, we can have a good journey without any worry and troubles.

In all, although the television and worldwide computer make us know many places more easily, they cannot take the place of tourism. To the contrary, because they supply us more information about the scenes, we can rise more eager to go out and manage our trips more convenient.

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顶

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Will the tourism become obsolete as the television and worldwide computer connections make people become familiar with a lot of places which they have never visited? I strongly disagree. In my view, also these media can make us get to know some knowledge about the scenes, it cannot make us become familiar with them, and cannot replace the position of tourism. What is more, they serve as the channels to attract us to new places, and make our trips more convenient.
(在语言上，有一些说法好象还是不怎么地道，尤其主题句)

It is undeniable that the television and worldwide computer have brought a electronic storm and connection revolution. With these developed media, people can know more about the world, and the world is going to be a global country. Nowadays, we can sit before the television or the computer, enjoying the great scenes which are miles away. However, this cannot replace the position of the tourism, for what we face is only a plane, but not the solid scenes. Perhaps the pictures in the plane are vivid, but we cannot fully feel the beauty of nature and humanity. For example, when we climb a mountain, we can make friends from other places, feel the spirit of conquering, and get a satisfaction of success after reach to the top. Standing on the top of the mountain, we can inspire the fresh air, overlook to the countries and forests in the base, and enjoy the bask of the sunshine, the smell of flowers, all of which can only be imaged when we sit before the computer and television. In this sense, these media can only serve as way of finding out interesting places, but to become familiar with new places, we can only go there by ourselves.
本段思想都还是不错的，只是语言说法上还是有些欠缺。比如第二个句子，就有两个主语。这个问题普遍存在！
本段的结尾，也是这个毛病。

Moreover, people go to tourism not only want to know something about it, but to relax themselves and flee away from the busy and burdensome daily work for a while. As nowadays people become less interesting in the common pastime such as parties, shopping, and so on, they need other things to recall the spirit and refresh themselves. So they choose tourism, which surely cannot be replaced by clicking mouse and browsing before the computer. In this sense, unless people do not want to refresh themselves and indulge in the quotidian life, the tourism will never be obsolete.
（应该重点放在两者的比较上，而不是需要tourism这个本文的前提。如果电视也能满足呢？你要驳斥电视不能满足。

In fact, while the television and computer cannot replace the tourism, they even serve as propaganda and facilities of such activities. First, as people learn the attraction about these scenes, they rouse the eager to visit there. Take me as an example, when I saw the beautiful and interesting scene of Disney Park in America, I swore that there would be a day that I went there, which urges me to be harder to achieve my goal. Second, through the television and computer, we can select the place we want to go most, and get the latest information about the hostels and admission fees about the scenes, so to manage our trip more convenient. We can even book the hotels and join in the local travel agency ahead of time. With this information about the scenes, we can have a good journey without any worry and troubles.

In all, although the television and worldwide computer make us know many places more easily, they cannot take the place of tourism. To the contrary, because they supply us more information about the scenes, we can rise more eager to go out and manage our trips more convenient.

总的来说，文章的思想的确非常不错。只是需要在语言的逻辑上做一些提升！很多说法都是不怎么地道的。不过限定时间写成这样，至少4分吧！