Argument9 打字总是出错，模版也忘了！郁闷中！稍微给了评价，肯定要改的！

翦瞳UID：184872

------摘要------
380字，写得少了，几乎不知道怎么写了，逻辑掌握不好，感觉很多东西，无法组织的好一些。这一次打字总是出错。郁闷！都是没有练打字的错！稍微改了拼写错误
攻击点：
15年的变化
Grades 的作用
与alpha 比较的无效
Job 的其他一些因素

------题目------
The following appeared in a memorandum from a dean at Omega University.
'Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by thirty percent. Potential employers apparently believe the grades at Omega are inflated; this would explain why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors.'
------正文------

No matter how sound the argument seems at first glance, after considerate examination, we can find several critical flaws which undermine its credibility. The author mistakenly assumes that all things are stationary during extended period and neglects other possible factors which can cause low success in finding jobs. In addition, the arguer fails to take into account that there are maybe many distinctions between Omega and Alpha University which render the comparison invalid.

To begin with, the argument is not convincing due to its assumption that all things will not change as time goes on. In fact, after fifteen years the Omega University may have altered a lot in its teachers structure, curriculum designing, students resource, and so on. If courses provided by school are more feasible to be accepted by major students, and the teachers have improved drastically in their capabilities and skills of teaching, students are more like to get higher grades than ever before.

In addition, the ever scores fifteen yeas ago may be very low, so that even when scores have increased thirty percent, they are lower than those of Alpha University. We also can find any information about opinion from employees that they are dissatisfied with high scores. The inflated scores may be in proper level and innocent for failure of searching jobs.

Furthermore, the author ignores other factors which may be the primary reason resulting in the low accessible to jobs in Omega, such as the reputation of school, the faculties provided by school, and as forth. Maybe the curriculum set in Alpha University is not suitable to the competitive and developing society, which means society does not need students graduating from Omega University while Alpha University has designed courses according to the social needs and require.

It is also possible that the Alpha itself as a whole school is better than Omega. In other words, Alpha may have advantages which Omega could not achieve in many aspects such as the professors and institutions other than simply contribute the shortcoming to the higher grades. As for the unfair comparison, the argument is groundless.

In sum, the argument draws a unpersuasive conclusion based on some irrelevant evidence. Therefore, without careful thinking and better evaluation, the author can not regard the higher grades as the major reasons.
（是不是忘记了模版，是因为到了无招胜有招的境界了？只好安慰自己了，就要进考场了）
;P;P

yuchenUID：2111079

yuchenUID：2111079

No matter how sound the argument seems at first glance, after considerate examination, we can find several critical flaws which undermine its credibility. The author mistakenly assumes that all things are stationary during extended period and neglects other possible factors which can cause low success in finding jobs. In addition, the arguer fails to take into account that there are maybe many distinctions between Omega and Alpha University which render the comparison invalid.

To begin with, the argument is not convincing due to its assumption that all things will not change as time goes on. In fact, after fifteen years the Omega University may have altered a lot in its teachers structure, curriculum designing, students resource, and so on. If courses provided by school are more feasible to be accepted by major students, and the teachers have improved drastically in their capabilities and skills of teaching, students are more like[用likely好些] to get higher grades than ever before[ever].

In addition, the ever scores fifteen yeas ago may be very low, so that even when scores have increased thirty percent, they are lower than those of Alpha University. We also can find any information about opinion from employees that they are dissatisfied with high scores. The inflated scores may be in proper level and innocent for failure of searching jobs.

Furthermore, the author ignores other factors which may be the primary reason resulting in the low accessible to jobs in Omega, such as the reputation of school, the faculties provided by school, and as forth.[有这种用法吗？and so forth] Maybe the curriculum set in Alpha University is not suitable to the competitive and developing society, which means society does not need students graduating from Omega University while Alpha University has designed courses according to the social needs and require. 最好说明白写，比如一个是理工院校，一个是艺术院校

It is also possible that the Alpha itself as a whole school is better than Omega. In other words, Alpha may have advantages which Omega could not achieve in many aspects such as the professors and institutions other than simply contribute the shortcoming to the higher grades. As for the unfair comparison, the argument is groundless.
既然上一段提到the reputation of school, the faculties最好霸两段和到一起，在组织组织

In sum, the argument draws a unpersuasive conclusion based on some irrelevant evidence. Therefore, without careful thinking and better evaluation, the author can not regard the higher grades as the major reasons.
总结;写的还是挺好的。论证结构在组织一下，最后好像有点乱。加油！！

我的argument欢迎拍砖！！
http://edu.gter.net/bbs/viewthre ... type%26typeid%3D102

kolu_renUID：158196

我也来先占个位置

kolu_renUID：158196

No matter how sound the argument seems at first glance, after considerate examination, we can find several critical flaws which undermine its credibility. The author mistakenly assumes that all things are stationary during extended period and neglects other possible factors which can cause low success in finding jobs. In addition, the arguer fails to take into account that there are maybe many distinctions between Omega and Alpha University which render the comparison invalid.

To begin with, the argument is not convincing due to its assumption that all things will not change as time goes on (by) . In fact, after fifteen years the Omega University may have altered a lot in its teachers structure, curriculum designing, students resource, and so on. If courses provided by school are more feasible to be accepted by major students, and the teachers have improved drastically in their capabilities and skills of teaching, students are more like to get higher grades than ever before. (建议可以提出知识是不断在更新的，过去作为新知识的，现在学生可能已经通过网络有所了解并拥有一定基础学起来当然得心应手咯，所以grades会比过去高。这样的说法对时间这个论点比较support。）

In addition, the ever scores fifteen yeas ago may be very low, so that even when scores have increased thirty percent, they are lower than those of Alpha University. We also can find any information about opinion from employees that they are dissatisfied with high scores. The inflated scores may be in proper level and innocent for failure of searching jobs. （这一段有点牵强，似乎跟B3有关联又跟B4有关联。你是想写一个过渡吗？如果不是建议还是不要写了，我觉得于其这样还不如把另三个理由写充分，不要给ETS一个没有充分论证扣分的理由。）

Furthermore, the author ignores other factors which may be the primary reason resulting in the low accessible to jobs in Omega, such as the reputation of school, the faculties provided by school, and as forth. Maybe the curriculum set in Alpha University is not suitable to the competitive and developing society, which means society does not need students graduating from Omega University while Alpha University has designed courses according to the social needs and require. （我也同意楼上的观点索性干脆地提出一个是艺术另一个是理工类型的院校，同时也可提出文中所说的时间段正好是对某一类型如理工类的人才的需求比较大。因此才会导致就业率低的问题。）

It is also possible that the Alpha itself as a whole school is better than Omega. In other words, Alpha may have advantages which Omega could not achieve in many aspects such as the professors and institutions other than simply contribute the shortcoming to the higher grades. As for the unfair comparison, the argument is groundless.

In sum, the argument draws an unpersuasive conclusion based on some irrelevant evidence. Therefore, without careful thinkingconsideration and better evaluation, the author can not regard the higher grades as the major reasons.


感觉B3, B4重复，我觉得可以说由于是由学生给教授打分评估教授的教学效果，因此造成教授为了能让学生给打一个高分，故意打高的grades，因此造成了grades虚高。

会不会觉得我的口气太生硬了？我只是提出我的意见，不过你的行文很流畅，这一点非常只得我学习，希望通过交流我的行文也能如此。再好好理一下你的思路吧？！

kolu_renUID：158196

忘了提一句帮忙也拍一下我的issue 51重写制作吧？
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ghlight=&page=2