Issue48 欢迎coterie5的成员修改.

llaimarUID: 205976

ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

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Concerning whether history is decided by great individuals or by groups of common populace, the speaker asserts that it is more likely decided by groups of general public. I basically agree with this view, as society should not omit the contribution of public who is the basic unit to construct a society. To better present my standpoint, let me illustrate it in details.

To begin with, when people retrospect the history of human-beings, he or she would find the fact that it is more of the groups of common people that facilitating the development of human-beings society. Take, the Russia for example. At the time of the Second World War, when Germany troops encroach into the land of Russia, and have a ambition to occupy it entirely. Although Germany has made a conscientious analysis about the actual strength of Russian troops, and drew up a thoroughly plan for it, however, they ignored another significant factor: the public of Russia. When the war break out, German are doomed to failure, as every people of Russia was handing up, fighting for the freedom and peace of their mother land, Germany troops quickly found themselves bogged drown in the Sargasso Sea of the formidable strength of populace, and at last evacuated from Russia. In this angle, we could say that it is the Public who change the history of the whole Russia.

In addition, the culture and history, at the most times, is presented by the populace of a society, which can not be substituted by only the famous few. Examples abound, the typical one is the American President George W. Bush, who is not like to use cell phone and everyone who is going into his office will be told to take off their cell phone, too. Does this characteristic of the President Bush can represent the characters of our society? The fact is (from a recently survey took by a famous newspaper) the using of mobile phone is becoming more popular than any other times in the history. As a result, so when people want to get to the real culture of a country or a society, he or she must have to get to know more information about what is about the common public.

Admittedly, people should not neglect the contribution of the great individual of a society. The famous few, who often as a leader or celebrity of a society, usually have more influence in a society, and make a society developing in the direction which they have planned. In other words, sometimes it is the very famous few changed the history and people's life. The father of America, George Washington, serves as a paradigmatic instance to support this point, who is the commander of Continental Army during the revolutionary War, the first President in the history of the United States, and a person changed the history of American, and from that time on, a great country born. And Washington solved many problems after being elected to be the President, in which transforming the "plan" of the Constitution into a "working" government is of the greatest significance.

Finally, maybe history is as a whole which is constructed by both the famous few and the public who inclined to be forgotten by our descendents. However, they are both necessary for human-beings' history as well as the development of the society nowadays. Maybe, they just the two sides of a coin, which are always being exist in a society, without each of them, the society can not be considered as a society.

In summary, from all the discussion above, we can safely draw the conclusion that an optimal federal approach is a balanced one which requires to emphasis both the famous few and common groups.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[ 本帖最后由 staralways 于 2006-3-7 10:18 编辑 ]

lasyfishUID: 2192273

Concerning whether history is decided by great individuals or by groups of common populace(意思没有问题,表述有点点瑕疵,试试看whether it is a individual or a group work that roll the wheel of history.呵呵, 一点建议而已), the speaker asserts that it is more likely decided by groups of general public(试试看用not..but ..). I basically agree with this view, as society should not omit(换成over looked 那个是"省略"而非"忽视") the contribution of public who is the basic unit to construct a society(罗嗦了,呵呵直接说...public,the basic unit of the society). To better present my standpoint, let me illustrate it in details(承上启下,不错不错,我要学习,呵呵).
To begin with, when people(删掉两个词,只有人类能回顾了啦) retrospect the history of human-beings, he or she would find the fact that it is more of the groups of common people that facilitating the development of human-beings society. Take, the Russia for example. At the time of the Second World War(有地道一些的说法,例如WWII), when Germany troops encroach into the land of Russia, and have a ambition(换成ambitioned,你的说法有些罗嗦) to occupy it entirely. Although(这个词用的有问题) Germany has made a conscientious analysis about the actual strength of Russian troops, and drew up a thoroughly(??) plan for it, however, they ignored another(去掉,换成a) significant factor: the public of Russia. When the war break out, German are doomed to failure, as(almost) every people of Russia was handing up(??意思有问题), fighting for the freedom and peace of their mother land, Germany troops quickly found themselves bogged drown in the Sargasso Sea of the formidable strength of populace, and at last evacuated from Russia. In this angle, we could say that it is the Public who change(改变?试试看换成made or wrote) the history of the whole Russia.

In addition, the culture and history, at the most times, is presented by the populace of a society, which can not be substituted by only the famous few. Examples abound, the typical one is the American President George W. Bush, who is not like to use cell phone and everyone who is going into his office will be told to take off their cell phone, too.(没有看明白这个句子) Does this characteristic of the President Bush can represent the characters of our society? The fact is (from a recently survey took by a famous newspaper) the using of mobile phone is becoming more popular than any other times in the history. As a result, so when people want to get to the real culture of a country or a society, he or she must have to get to know more information about what is about the common public.(这个例子so没有说服力that我觉得你应该考虑换一个)

Admittedly, people should not neglect the contribution of the great individual of a society. The famous few, who(去掉) often as a leader or celebrity of a society, usually have(用do这个次) more influence in a society, and make a society developing in the direction which they have planned. In other words, sometimes it is the very famous few changed the history and people's life. The father of America, George Washington, serves as a paradigmatic instance to support this point, who is the commander of Continental Army during the revolutionary War, the first President in the history of the United States, and a person changed the history of American, and from that time on, a great country born. And Washington solved many problems after being elected to be the President, in which transforming the "plan" of the Constitution into a "working" government is of the greatest significance.(这段太牛了,呵呵 我都想背诵了,呵呵)

Finally, maybe history is as a whole which is constructed by both the famous few and the public who inclined to be forgotten by our descendents.(晕,原来你是中庸) However, they are both necessary for human-beings' history as well as the development of the society nowadays. Maybe, they just the two sides of a coin, which are always(试试看which are and will forever) being exist in a society, without each of them, the society can not be considered as a society.

In summary, from all the discussion above, we can safely draw the conclusion that an optimal federal approach is a balanced one which requires to emphasis (on)both the famous few and common groups

逻辑不错,但是你的例子好象是一边倒的
最后才看出你的立场啊~~~汗~
语言有一些瑕疵,再看看哦
呵呵
6分拿不到啦,4.5左右
牛
牛!!
加油~~~~

lasyfishUID: 2192273

你的打字速度好象很牛啊
加油!!!!

lasyfishUID: 2192273

历史,不仅仅是指政治,
人文,科学,艺术.....都有自己的发展历史,我虽然文章中忘记说了,但是后来提到了小莫小牛两位同学,算是表明我没有忘记他们.
你的手机的例子....换成别人好不..总统诶...又只政治人物啊~~~
呵呵
一点点建议,
加油!!!

llaimarUID: 205976

原帖由 lasyfish 于 2006-3-7 09:37 发表
历史,不仅仅是指政治,
人文,科学,艺术.....都有自己的发展历史,我虽然文章中忘记说了,但是后来提到了小莫小牛两位同学,算是表明我没有忘记他们.
你的手机的例子....换成别人好不..总统诶...又只政治人物啊~~~
...

恩,

我也觉得我的那个例子很烂.

当时写的时候 实在没想出来别的了。

就凑字数,写了那个.:)

是该写写其他领域.

我的思维太窄了.汗!!

谢谢提醒..

觉得你改的太好了.