进军美利坚写作10.6作文by sunshine-happyzhengang

happyzhengangUID: 2502624

Governmentshould pay more attention on health care issues than on environmental issues

Along with the development of human society, science and technology, people’s life has reached to the point where allows the government to pay enough attention on our health. So some people may think government should pay more attention on health care than other issues such as environment. For my point of view, however, I think both of the issues are crucial to us.

To begin with, there is no doubt that the government should pay enough attention on people’s health care. This is because health is the basic issue for everyone, not only for people’s own sake, but for the whole nation’s development and prosperity. Take national medical fund for example, every year the government spends such great mount ofmoney to support the scientists to research new methods to cure serious diseases such as AIDS and cancer and so on. Luckily, batches of new medicines have been researched out to save people’s life, such as vaccine of SARS. But there is still a long journey to go for our medical system, the government plays an important role in it.

Furthermore, environment is also a tough problem to solve. Some people may say they do not need to consider the environment issues such as air pollution, water pollution and soilpollution. They think these issues are not important as their health. It seems right that these pollutions may not endanger their lives. But in the long run, people will certainly be the sufferer. Take Green Effect for instance, as the expense of the fossil fuel, more and more CO2 has been outlet into the air. The global temperature increases much faster than before, this causes the sea level rises, a lot places will disappear from the world. Besides some coder placebecome warmer than before, the local animals or plants may extinguish because can not get used to the new environment. This may destroy the ecological chain which human being belongs to. Thus, we have to pay much attention onenvironment.

Besides these two issues,there are a lot of factors our government should take into account such aseconomic and international cooperation. One can not simply say one issue shouldbe superior to other issue. Only each factor stays in the balance environment,our society can becomes better and better.[/fly]

joyceliuUID: 2477232

Alongwith the development of human society, science and technology, people’slife has reached to the point where allows the government to pay enoughattention on our health. So some people may think government should paymore attention on health care than other issues such as environment.For my point of view, however, I think both of the issues are crucialto us.
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* f: J, u; v0 v0 F# WTobegin with, there is no doubt that the government should pay enoughattention on people’s health care. This is because(since) health is the basicissue for everyone, not only for people’s own sake, but for the wholenation’s development and prosperity. Take national medical fund forexample, every year the government spends such great mount ofmoney tosupport the scientists to research(the scientific reserach in finding)new methods to cure serious diseasessuch as AIDS and cancer and so on. Luckily, batches of new medicineshave been researched out to save people’s life, such as vaccine ofSARS. But there is still a long journey to go for our medical system,the government plays an important role in it( undoubtedly,government plays a significant role in solving this problem).
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$ C6 E& x* I: WFurthermore,environment is also a tough problem to solve. Some people may say theydo not need to consider the environment issues such as air pollution,water pollution (contamination)and soilpollution. They think these issues are notimportant as their health. It seems right that these pollutions may notendanger their lives. But in the long run, people will certainly be thesufferer. Take Green (house)Effect for instance, as the expense of the fossilfuel, more and more CO2(carbon dioxides) has been outlet(released) into the air. The globaltemperature increases much faster than before, this causes the sealevel rises(the rising sea level), a lot places will disappear(the disappearing of lots of places) from the world. Besides somecoder placebecome warmer than before, the local animals or plants mayextinguish because can not get used to the new environment(they fail to make adaptaiton to the new environment) . This maydestroy the ecological chain(eco sysytem)which human being belongs to. Thus, wehave to pay much attention onenvironment.  S8 c# m4 G! Z% `) f# z
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Besides thesetwo issues,there are a lot of factors our government should take intoaccount such aseconomic and international cooperation. One can notsimply say one issue shouldbe superior to other issue. Only each factorstays in the balance environment,our society can becomes better andbetter.[/fly]

happyzhengangUID: 2502624

2# joyceliu

谢谢joyce
基本上把我文章的毛病给找出来了，厉害

有什么建议呢？呵呵

lupiscesUID: 2231942

Governmentshould pay more attention on health care issues than on environmental issues

Along with the development of human society, science and technology（这3个并列关系？）, people’s life has reached to the point where allows the government to pay enough attention on our health. So some people may think government should pay more attention on health care than other issues such as environment. For（from） my point of view, however, I think both of the issues are crucial to us.

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To begin with, there is no doubt that the government should pay enough attention on people’s health care. This is because health is the basic issue for everyone, not only for people’s own sake, but for the whole nation’s development and prosperity. Take national medical fund for example, every year the government spends such great mount ofmoney to support the scientists to research new methods to cure serious diseases such as AIDS and cancer and so on. Luckily, batches of new medicines have been researched out to save people’s life, such as vaccine of SARS. But there is still a long journey to go for our medical system, the government plays an important role in it.

Furthermore, environment is also a tough problem to solve. Some people may say they do not need to consider the environment issues such as air pollution, water pollution and soilpollution. They think these issues are not （as） important as their health. It seems right that these pollutions may not endanger their lives. But in the long run, people will certainly be the sufferer. Take Green Effect for instance, as the expense of the fossil fuel（没说完？）, more and more CO2 has been outlet into the air. The global temperature increases much faster than before, this causes the sea level rises, a lot places will disappear from the world（这句话结构很乱）. Besides some colder place become warmer than before, the local animals or plants may extinguish because can not get used to the new environment. This may destroy the ecological chain which human being belongs to. Thus, we have to pay much attention on（ to ）environment.

Besides these two issues,there are a lot of factors our government should take into account such as economic and international cooperation. One can not simply say one issue shouldbe superior to other issue. Only each factor stays in the balance （balanced）environment,our society can becomes better and better

语法问题比较多，
句子通顺，但是不是很有逻辑的感觉，可以再想想