syk1984720的作文贴

syk1984720UID: 2605277

2009-3-23
Young people should try different job before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term.
  Some young people enjoy change, they try different job before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term and look forward to new experiences, while others enjoy a steady paced, habitual existence. Both of these styles have their own merits. But as far as I am concern, trying various jobs before young people determine which job they will do in the future.

First of all, it is always top of the list of my viewpoint that young people should try and go through different things. Because if we don’t try something different, we will never know which is best to you. According to 100 studies carried out in 10 major cities throughout China, 83% of graduates are not clear about their ideal job. No one can deny the truth behind the number. As a freshman in the work market, young people don’t know what kind of jobs suit them best. In their mind, a good job just means high salary, cozy workplace and higher status. With this idea many of them lost their path and just work day by day without any passion because they don’t understand what is a good job and which job they really want. That’s why there are so many occupational counseling company. Therefore, to find a best suitable job, young people should try different kinds of jobs.

Moreover, trying different jobs enables young people to make acquaintance with different people. In present day society, interpersonal relationship has become one significant part of our life and in some cases it may determine one success or not. I would like to cite what one of my favorable celebrities has mentioned, “I will prepare and some day my chance will come”. Trying different jobs and communicating with all kinds of people will prepare better for our future. Maybe someday one of these people will give you a hand on the path of your career.

In addition, an equally essential aspect which deserves people’s attention is that by trying different jobs young people can acquire different work experience which is crucial for their job hunting. For example, many companies desire employees who are competent in more one position and offer higher salaries to attract them. Even if a job applicant only possesses credentials from a well-known university, employers may still place a higher value on an applicant with relevant experience.

From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that young people should try different job before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term.

ly8768UID: 2452066

1# syk1984720
修改的在word文档里

syk1984720UID: 2605277

2010-03-24
Do you agree or disagree that improving schools is the most factor in successful development of country.

cp19880313UID: 2643174

3.24作业

john_332UID: 2741978

3-24  作文修改  by  舜

2010-03-24

Do you agree or disagree that improving schools is the most factor in successful development of country.

With fast development of modern society, the status of universities is more and more challenged. Many countries are faced with such a dilemma, whether they should invest on schools（or not）. With every aspect taken(every aspects) into consideration, I believe that improving schools is the most important factor in successful development of country.

First, innovation is the most powerful propellant(高级词汇) of a nation’s progress and schools are the right place where innovation happens. Nowadays there is a growing awareness that innovation has been playing an essential role in the development of country. While every day every time all kinds of new ideas and technologies are born in universities because there are excellent professors, innovative students and advanced facilities(从句缺成分吧，好像没说完啊). Therefore no one can deny that schools are the main power of expediting（高级词，但是似乎不太合适） scientific and technological progress. According to a latest study conducted by Princeton University, in the latest three years 81% global new scientific theories and technologies have been created by universities. Since the competition between countries becomes more and more fierce and the key point of it is innovation, only（缺一个when，if） putting schools on primary place can a nation develop constantly.  
   挺好的，某些句子的用法很高端。

Second, young people are the hope of a nation and schools are the right place where they are trained. Just imagine that if a country is regardless of schools and leave young people alone. What will happen? Students who are lack of good education will lost themselves and have no ability to contribute their country,（前句的表达比较中式） and maybe they will never care about the destiny of their country. Because school is the place that not only inculcate（从来没用过着种词，所以也不知道是否正确） young people with knowledge and technique but also cultivate their spirit to enable them stronger （enable sb stronger ?）. Take myself for example. After attending university, I have changed every day.（I've been changing ...） The more knowledge and ideas I absorb, the wiser I become. I know my goal clearly and plan my future. Gradually I am concern about my country and I will do my best to make her better one day. Since schools determine （决定？太绝对了一点）a nation’s future, country should pay much more attention to schools.  

Admittedly, it may be true that other aspects such as economics, harmony of society, population are also important. However, this alone does not provide sufficient support to claim that other aspects are more important than schools. Actually these factors are more or less connected with schools.

Based on the above discussions, a natural conclusion is that improving schools is most important factor to a country’s development.

整体来看，文章有很多漂亮且高端的句型、词汇，结构也还不错。但是有些地方读起来有点不太连贯，衔接得不好。

syk1984720UID: 2605277

2010-03-29
Some people think one's working is more important than being with one's famly.


Nowadays, with the coming of economic crisis getting a job and working hard seem to become the primary thing of most of people. And some people hold the opinion that work is everything. Although this kind of idea is absolute, some people do think that one’s working is more important than being with one’s family. As far as I am concerned, both of them are the most important to individuals and people should handle the relationship between work and family.

On one hand, working is the prerequisite for living. As humans, the primary and basic thing that they have to think about is existence. So people have to work for money. Although some of people say that to work for money is not their original intention, as the bread winner, they have the responsibility to support their families. It is hard to imagine that people just say, “I love you but I have no money to support you.”Moreover, to individuals working is the necessary mean to devote themselves to the world and realize their personal value. Since many people have their own ambition, no matter what goals they have they want to be useful to the world and realize their personal value through their working.

On the other hand, family as natural intended can inspire people to work better. First, people need the love of family. Human is a kind of creature which is born with affections. To consider that there is no difference between human and machine if we human just work day by day without any affections, how cold the world would be. Indeed, most of people just work hard for their families to improve their lives. So no one can deny that family is the power of people’s working. Moreover, the family can give support to people’s working. When you are depressed about your work, they inspire you; when you are excited about your promotion, they are proud of you; when you come back home tiredly after work, they relax you. Also, they can give some invaluable suggestions about people’s work. Therefore, family is significant to people’s working.

As to which aspect is more important, there is no absolute answer. People should arrange their life and put their work and family on a equal place. Only by handling the relationship between working and family easily can people enjoy both of them.

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

级别太低，发不了附件，有空上下Q我直接传给你吧~~是在WORD里改的。。。

pochun111UID: 2608867

Nowadays, with the coming of economic crisis getting a job and working hard (virtually)seem to become the primary thing of most of people. And some people hold the opinion that work is everything. Although this kind of idea is absolute(reasonable to some extent), some people do think that one’s working is more important than being with one’s family. As far as I am concerned, both of them are the most important to (have taken equivalent position ofindividuals and people should handle the relationship between work and familyseriously.
On one hand, working is the prerequisite for living. As humans, the primary and basic thing that they have to think about is existence.变换下句式 the necessities of life should be basiclly taken into account So people have to work for money. Although some of people say that to work for money is not their original intention, as the bread winner, they have the responsibility to support their families. It is hard to imagine that people just say, “I love you but I have no money to support you.”Moreover, to individuals working不太懂 is the necessary mean to devote themselves to the world and realize their personal value. Since many people have their own ambition, no matter what goals they have they want to be useful to the world and realize their personal value through their working. 读起来很不顺 建议仔细修改一下
On the other hand, family as natural intended can inspire people to work better. First, people need the love of family. Human is a kind of creature which is born with affections. To consider （assume this condition）that there is no difference between human and machine， if we human just work day by day without any affections, how cold the world would be. Indeed, most of people just work hard for their families to improve their lives. So no one can deny that family is the power of people’s working. Moreover, the family can give support to people’s working. When you are depressed about your work, they inspire you; when you are excited about your promotion, they are proud of you; when you come back home tiredly after work, they relax you. Also, they can give some invaluable suggestions about people’s  yourwork. Therefore, family is significant to people’s working.

As to which aspect is more important, there is no absolute answer. People should arrange their life， and put their work and family on a equal place. Only by handling the relationship between working and family easily can people enjoy both of them.觉得你主要的问题在句子使用上 很多句子读起来不通顺 却成分 或其他的原因 建议多看范文 总结并加以修改 改的不对的地方希望指出 一起改进