【Flyer杀G作文组】第二次作业6月25日Issue130-By afufu1124

afufu1124UID: 2786856

ISSUE 130 有难度啊…社会、教育类
130. "How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."

分析：

结论型? Explain why it is hard to raise children who can help bring about a better society

因果型? Children socialized-> society->not such children

Children socialized does not determine the destiny of society, not to say find out the way to raise children who can help bring about a better society.

最终决定结论型比较好写（即解释为什么作者说法有道理），如下：

The arguer asserts that although the way children being socialized inevitably affects the developing track of society, there is not yet an identified pattern that can train children into persons contribute to a better society. One does not have to go very far to see the truth of this former statement. Close scrutiny of each of these facts, however, reveals that some effort could be made to help raise children who can give our society a brighter future.

On one hand, children’s philosophy of world, life and personal values has a great impact on how the society turn out to be. The racial discrimination phenomenon in nowadays society is gradually faded out because children are getting to treat community members fairly at early age. On the contrary, the mercy toward poor people weakened in the society since the money worship appears to spread among younger generation.

On the other hand, these attitudes toward different aspects of world, life and personal values are deeply affected during the growing process of children. Children are getting to treat community members fairly since they are taught that human being are born to be equal. Similarly, it is because they are brought up to believe wealth status is a critical norm to measure the success of any person that the money worship appears to spread among younger generation since.

Although there is not yet any special methods proved to be effective in raising up children who can contribute to a better society, we can still make some effort to shape children in a good way. Not one is born to tell the racial difference between people with different skin color, either is he born to value money over such precious things as friendship, love and family. It is the responsibility of parents, school and other members in this society to bring these concepts and thoughts to them.

On balance, the assertion rely on credible assumption that children’s philosophy of world, life and personal values has a great impact on how the society turn out to be and the way the children brought up change these philosophy gradually, while the conclusion that we have not yet learned how to raise children in a way better for the society render it unconvincing as it stands. Parents, school and other communities still hold the chance to affect children through words and deeds to some extent.

红绡UID: 2839171

1# afufu1124

修改~by潇

The arguer asserts that although the way children being socialized inevitably affects the developing track of society, there is not yet an identified pattern that can train children into persons contribute to a better society. One does not have to go very far to see the truth of this former statement. Close scrutiny of each of these facts, however, reveals that some effort could be made to help raise children who can give our society a brighter future.

On one hand, children’s philosophy of world, life and personal values has a great impact on how the society turn out to be. The racial discrimination phenomenon in nowadays society is gradually faded out because children are getting to treat community members fairly at early age. On the contrary, the mercy toward poor people weakened in the society since the money worship appears to spread among younger generation.

On the other hand, these attitudes toward different aspects of world, life and personal values are deeply affected during the growing process of children. Children are getting to treat community members fairly since they are taught that human beings are born to be equal. Similarly, it is because they are brought up to believe wealth status is a critical norm to measure the success of any person that the money worship appears to spread among younger generation since(since放在句尾?).

Although there is not yet any special methods proved to be effective in raising up children who can contribute to a better society, we can still make some effort to shape children in a good way. Not（No） one is born to tell the racial difference between people with different skin color, either is he born to value money over such precious things as friendship, love and family. It is the responsibility of parents, school and other members in this society to bring these concepts and thoughts to them.

On balance, the assertion rely on credible assumption that children’s philosophy of world, life and personal values has a great impact on how the society turn out to be and the way the children brought up change these philosophy gradually, while the conclusion that we have not yet learned how to raise children in a way better for the society render it unconvincing as it stands. Parents, school and other communities still hold the chance to affect children through words and deeds to some extent.

之前看修锐做的分析，这个题目是因果型的，和其他同学探讨了下，觉得只要逻辑合理，论述有理应该就可以

此文结构和逻辑性很好，语言perfect，学习ing~