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[活动] 2009 进军美利坚作文组 wondersmiths2第十五次作业 9.2 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-9-2 15:16:40 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
高分120,practice 6

In the lecture, the speaker talks about the causes of the transition from the cottage industry to the factory industry. She strongly casts doubts on the arguments stated in the reading passage, due to the following reasons.

First, technology is not a major cause for the change from the cottage industry to the factory industry, because it is common for people to hire more workers to gain more profits than to equip more complicated machine in the early stage. Besides, the steam engine was still in the state of experimental. So, it is not sufficient to prove that technology is a major cause of the transition.

Second, it is not necessary for a stronger legal protection for private property to exist at that time. Helen loom actually was public to people and became the new leader machine, which can not stimulate businessmen to invest in cotton factories. Hence, it is a direct contrast to the opinion displayed in the reading passage.

Finally, it should be admitted that factory production maybe can save the transportation cost. However, other costs such as the cost of factories' buildings and the pay for the supervisors were increased rapidly. Therefore, the view demonstrated in the reading passage is not convincing.
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发表于 2009-9-3 08:56:47 |只看该作者
咦?由于我是第二次交作业。。。不知道高分120是写综合。。。不好意思。。。我的那篇写的独立。。。
这篇我听了一下,第一个理由写的很好,都说全了。

但第二个理解有偏差吧,lecture说的是另一个地方也有legal protection for private ,但那个地方并没有transition from the cottage industry to the factory industry。所以“protection”并没有导致必然结果“transition”

第三个:other costs such as the cost of factories' buildings and the pay for the supervisors were increased rapidly
表达不好,并不是他们“increased rapidly”,而是他们的花费比transportation更高,而不是单纯的说他们涨价了。

写的不错,听力再加强吧
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发表于 2009-9-3 23:03:21 |只看该作者
In the lecture, the speaker talks about the causes of the transition from the cottage industry to the factory industry. She strongly casts doubts on the arguments stated in the reading passage, due to the following reasons.(这样写也行,但其实是passage 说的cause,她逐一反驳啊,但并没有说真正的cause)3 y: T7 Q! ~  A2 O+ G
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First, technology is not a major cause for the change from the cottage industry to the factory industry, because it is common for people to hire more workers to gain more profits than to equip more complicated machine in the early stage(强调是工业时代的早期). Besides, the steam engine was still in the state of experimental(in the experimental state). So, it is not sufficient to prove that technology is a major cause of the transition.$ m  F' x3 c5 t
! E' S& h% h# \( g8 r, S1 ?% n
Second, it is not necessary for a stronger legal protection for private property to exist at that time. Helen loom actually was public to people and became the new leader machine, which can not stimulate businessmen to invest in cotton factories. Hence, it is a direct contrast to the opinion displayed in the reading passage(呃,这段是听错啦,LZ再听听吧).! O' c1 g(). m( z
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Finally, it should be admitted that factory production maybe can save the transportation cost. However, other costs such as the cost of factories' buildings and the pay for the supervisors were increased rapidly(不是迅速增加,是此消耗比彼消耗大). Therefore, the view demonstrated in the reading passage is not convincing.

赫赫,再一次评论你的文章,加强听力就好啦,文笔功力还是很牛的,其实我听力也不好,高分那有个showing text,你可以每次写完看看,对听力也有提高,加油
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RE: 2009 进军美利坚作文组 wondersmiths2第十五次作业 9.2 [修改]

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2009 进军美利坚作文组 wondersmiths2第十五次作业 9.2
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