12.18独立写作

shiwei83UID: 2680950

Several days before, I found there was a hot debate on television talk show, it was about whether parents nowadays comprehend their children not better than parents 50 years ago. As far as I am concerned, I feel with regard to the understanding to their children, parents nowadays can not compared with their predecessor indeed.
First, compared to 50 years ago, there are less common topic
between parents and children today.
Because the world is changing rapidly with the quick development of technology, the new things emerge in endlessly. It provide a good opportunity to children, they can use many high-tech instruments such as mobile phone, internet, and so on. But their parents, maybe due to their ossified thinking, would reluctant to accept those new things. Which made their thinking much more conservative than their children. But 50 years ago, the gap between parents and children were not so big. For example, as a student major in computer science, I very keen on using high-tech products such as IPOD, PSP. But my parents did not know how to use them, as a consequence, each time I went home, I couldn't find any topic we were all interested in. I believe the same thing could not occur between parents and children 50 years ago.
Second, due to the limitation of that times, seldom did children leave their hometown work in another place, not to speak of go abroad. Parents and their children usually live in a small city, which provided a good chance to make parents and children have more time to stay together, and
could know each other better. Today, with the improvement of the thinking, more and more children work in another city far away from their parent’s habitat, so they would have little time and chance to communicate.
Finally, nowadays parents and children are under more pressure of competition, they can hardly found sufficient time to talk each other. For example, in some big cities, parents and children returned their home it was already 7 pm, after dinner, children always have to finish their
homework, until they finished, very late, they all tired, so they have no chance to talk, not to say understand well..
All in all, I believe it is generally parents understand their children not as well today as 50 years ago due to the above aspects I have mentioned.

shining_sjUID: 2485580

Several days before, I found there was a hot debate on television talk show, it was about whether parents nowadays comprehend their children not better than parents 50 years ago. As far as I am concerned, I feel这里是不是重复了。。 with regard to the understanding to their children, parents nowadays can not compared with their predecessor indeed.

First, compared to 50 years ago, there are less common topic between parents and children today.Because the world is changing rapidly with the quick development of technology, the new things emerge in endlessly. It provides a good opportunity that children can use many high-tech instruments such as mobile phone, internet, and so on. But their parents, maybe due to their ossified thinking,will be reluctant to accept those new things, which made their thinking much more conservative than that of their children. (我觉得这句：因为说父母思想守旧不敢接受新事物，所以他们比孩子们保守。这句逻辑不是很好，建议说因为思想保守，导致代沟啊，不能很好的理解孩子啊，比较好。。）But这句折转是针对哪个观点？ 50 years ago, the gap between parents and children were not so big. For example, as a student major in computer science, I very keen on using high-tech products such as IPOD, PSP. But my parents did not know how to use them, as a consequence, each time I went home, I couldn't find any topic we were all interested in. I believe the same thing could not occur between parents and children 50 years ago.
( a4 V& r6 x% R2 N3 U+ ASecond, due to the limitation of that times, seldom did children leave their hometown work in another place, not to speak of going abroad. Parents and their children usually live in a small city, which provided a good chance to make parents and children have more time to stay together, and
could know each other better. Today, with the improvement of the thinking, more and more children work in another city far away from their parent’s habitat, so they would have little time and chance to communicate.
, f% ]% V( P! QFinally, nowadays parents and children are under more pressure of competition, they can hardly found sufficient time to talk each other. For example, in some big cities, parents and children returned their home it was already 7 pm(didn't ..until..这种句型比较好）, after dinner.And children always have to finish their ; D3 O  m0 K$ `, }
homework, until they finished, very late, they all tired, so they have no chance to talk, not to say understand well..这句怪怪的。。不过改不来，抱歉
# ^& m  f. v- N' A% Z4 O: dAll in all, I believe it is generally parents understand their children not as well today as 50 years ago due to the above aspects I have mentioned.


楼主有个问题，就是句语句之间的衔接，两句话之间要注意断开和使用联词

wuxiahhuUID: 2582392

Several days before, I found there was a hot debate on television talk show, it was about whether parents nowadays comprehend their children not better than parents 50 years ago. As far as I am concerned, I feel（因为有As far as I am concerned） with regard to the understanding to their children, parents nowadays can not compared with their predecessor indeed.

First, compared to 50 years ago, there are less common topics between parents and children today. Because the world is changing rapidly with the quick development of technology, the new things emerge in endlessly. It provides a good opportunity to children, they can use many high-tech instruments such as mobile phone, internet, and so on. But their parents, maybe due to their ossified thinking, would reluctant to accept those new things, Which made their thinking much more conservative than their children. But 50 years ago, the gap between parents and children were not so big. For example, as a student major in computer science, I very keen on using high-tech products such as IPOD, PSP. But my parents did not know how to use them, as a consequence, each time I went home, I couldn't find any topic we were all interested in. I believe the same thing could not occur between parents and children 50 years ago
Second, due to the limitation of that times, seldom did children leave their hometown work for another place, not to speak of go abroad. Parents and their children usually live in a small city, which provided a good chance to make parents and children have more time to stay together, and could know each other better. Today, with the improvement of the thinking, more and more children work in another city far away from their parent’s habitat, so they would have little time and chance to communicate.

Finally, nowadays parents and children are under more pressure of competition, they can hardly found sufficient time to talk each other. For example, in some big cities, parents and children returned their home it was already 7 pm, after dinner, children always have to finish their homework, until they finished, very late, they all tired, so they have no chance to talk, not to say understand well..All in all, I believe it is generally parents understand their children not as well today as 50 years ago due to the above aspects I have mentioned.写得很好，尤其是例子举得很好，和你比起来，我觉得我写的有点空洞了，句式也很多样，只有一些小错误。加油！