6.15 Independent Writing-June

junedreamjuneUID: 2700743

Teachers should not make their social orpolitical view known to students, do you agree or not, explain why.

Teachers have great impacts on theirstudents. Not only the knowledge, teachers also pass on social virtues andcriteria toward the students. But there are also some areas where teachers arenot allowed to interfere, for example, religious beliefs. As for the politicalor social issues, it is controversial whether teachers have the right to maketheir own view known by the students. In my point of view, I think it isreasonable for teachers to make their ideas known to students, with the premisethat these ideas are not transmitted to students in a compelling and excludingway.

First of all, it is inevitable for teachersto express their positions or ideas towards public social or political issues.Teachers are also normal intellectuals, holding different ideas andperspectives towards current political and social issues. Languages are notneutral, but filled with emotions and ideologies of the speakers. Hence, whenintroducing current issues, teachers' positions are more or less revealed. Itis impossible for teachers to recoil their views totally.

Despite that the quality or depth of theidea might be various, such kind of view more or less helps a student form abetter understanding towards a particular political or social event. Basically,comparing with students who lack enough social experiences, teachers are moreexperienced and informed to have a more comprehensive view. If the teacherexpresses his/her view in a suitable manner, students will benefit much fromit.

As for the correct expressing manner, Iwant to further explain the premise of my view. Teachers should tell in asuggesting way, that is, to express their point as suggestions rather than asingle correct answer. Here I want to present an example of one teacher I'vemet. When talking about the Tibet chaos in 2008, after informing us with theviews of domestic and foreign media, he also pinpoint his attitudes, in anopening way. After that, he also emphasized what he knew about the issue wasalso limited. Further, he encouraged us to think further about the chaos. Ireally appreciated his manner in presenting his attitudes.

In sum, I hold the view that it isnecessary as well as inevitable for teachers to express their view point ofcurrent political or social issues. What teachers should pay attention is nothow to reveal their standings, but how to express them in an opening manner.

FFFMZJBUID: 2479141

1、下次写作的时候请把WORD版本一起传上来，这样复制和粘贴会有乱码。

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你的文章也蛮不错的，在我的能力范围内我改了一版，你看看吧，希望可以共同讨论，共同进步。


Teachers should not make their social or political view known to students, do you agree or not, explain why.

Teachers have great impacts on their students. Not only the knowledge, teachers also pass (impart) on social virtues and criteria toward (to) the students. But there are also some areas where teachers are not allowed to interfere, for example, religious beliefs. As for the political or social issues, it is controversial whether teachers have the right to make their own view known by the students. In my point of view, I think it is reasonable for teachers to make their ideas known to students, with the premise that these ideas are not transmitted to students in a compelling and excluding way (很精彩的过度语句).

First of all, it is inevitable for teachers to express their positions or ideas towards public social or political issues. Teachers are also normal intellectuals, holding different ideas and perspectives towards current political and social issues. Languages are not neutral, but filled with emotions and ideologies of the speakers. Hence, when introducing current issues, teachers' positions are more or less revealed. It is impossible for teachers to recoil their views totally. (这段是不是可以把观点表达的更明确一些，教师就是应该向学生表达自己的政治和社会观点而不是不可避免，个人意见，呵呵)

Despite that the quality or depth of the idea might be various, such kind of view more or less helps a student form a better understanding towards a particular political or social event. Basically, comparing (是comparing还是compared？) with students who lack enough social experiences, teachers are more experienced and informed to have a more comprehensive view (这句我不怎么懂，老师更有经验，被告知表达一个更综合的观点？). If the teacher expresses his/her view in a suitable manner, students will benefit much from it.

As for the correct expressing manner, I want to further explain the premise of my view. Teachers should tell in a suggesting way, that is, to express their point as suggestions rather than a single correct answer (Teachers should express their points as suggestions in a suggesting way rather than a single correct answer). Here I want to present an example of one teacher I’ve met. When talking about the Tibet chaos in 2008, after informing us with the views of domestic and foreign media, he also pinpoint (pinpoints) his attitudes, in an opening way. After that, he also emphasized what he knew about the issue was also limited. Further, he encouraged us to think further about the chaos independently. I really appreciated his manner in presenting his attitudes.


In sum, I hold the view that it is necessary as well as inevitable for teachers to express their view point of current political or social issues. What teachers should pay attention is not how to reveal their standings, but how to express them in an opening manner.

junedreamjuneUID: 2700743

谢谢修改~但我的等级在gter好像还不能上传附件？ 2# FFFMZJB

雪梦无痕UID: 2447732

谢谢修改~但我的等级在gter好像还不能上传附件？ 2# FFFMZJB
junedreamjune 发表于 2010-6-16 12:59

可以去水版水水，等级就上来了

sunersunUID: 2734987

Teachers have great impacts on their students. Not only the knowledge（用Besides knowledge更好）, teachers also pass on social virtues and criteria toward the students. But there are also some areas where teachers are not allowed to interfere, for example, religious beliefs. As for the political or social issues, it is controversial whether teachers have the right to make their own view known by the students. In my point of view, I think it is reasonable for teachers to make their ideas known to students, with the premise that these ideas are not transmitted to students in a compelling and excluding way.开头段有选择的承认，很好的提出观点

First of all, it is inevitable for teachers to express their positions or ideas towards public social or political issues（这句话有问题，换成插入语吧it is inevitable for teachers to express their positions or ideas, social or political, to the public）. Teachers are also normal intellectuals, holding different ideas and perspectives towards current political and social issues. Languages are not(加上only) neutral, but filled with emotions and ideologies of the speakers. Hence, when introducing current issues, teachers' positions are more or less revealed. It is impossible for teachers to recoil their views totally. 这段说理很充分，句式变化也很好。
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Despite that the quality or depth of the idea might be various, such kind of view more or less helps a student form a better understanding towards a particular political or social event. Basically, comparing with students who lack enough social experiences, teachers are more experienced and informed to have a more comprehensive view. If the teacher expresses his/her view in a suitable manner, students will benefit much from it.感觉和上一段一样，说理很好，但缺乏specific example。e8 z% ~$ j9 [! V# u' ~6 l

As for the correct expressing manner, I want to further explain the premise of my view. Teachers should tell in a suggesting way, that is, to express their point as suggestions rather than a single correct answer. Here I want to present an example of one teacher I've met. When talking about the Tibet chaos in 2008, after informing us with the views of domestic and foreign media, he also pinpoint（时态错误pinpointed） his attitudes, in an opening way. After that（这里用个递进感觉更好，Moreover）, he also emphasized what he knew about the issue was also limited. Further（Furthermore）, he encouraged us to think further about the chaos（以上两句可以合为一句，Moreover, he also emphasized that what he knew about the issue was also limited, and we should think deeper）. I really appreciated his manner in presenting his attitudes.这段很好，有说理有举例。 T3 d& ]
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In sum, I hold the view that it is necessary as well as inevitable for teachers to express their view point of current political or social issues. What teachers should pay attention is not how to reveal their standings, but how to express them in an opening manner.
作者写的很好，基本没有语法错误，结构和逻辑都很清楚，句型和用词变化也很多.但是觉得可以在benefits那一段写多一点，manner那段少一点，不然有点主次部分的感觉，题目是问should or not不是how。按照本文的思路，应该是从teachers和students两个角度来分析，而且最好能有具体的例子，最后点一下manner，这样感觉结构、逻辑和主次都很清楚了。（个人意见，仅供参考，一起加油！）

junedreamjuneUID: 2700743

5# sunersun 其实我也觉得有些离题了，意见很受用~多谢~