kaolaliang独立写作 作文贴

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

19 June
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement :It is better to spend money on
traveling and vacation than to save money for the future

  I fundamently agree with the assertion that the way of consuming. Nowadays, many people
live in a huge press, so that spend time on traveling and vacation become their most
effective way of depress.However most of them wouldn't spend all of their money on it. In
my oppion, choose these ways of consuming that should under their economy's control.
  Travel can make people relax and fullfill their knowledge to make a better life in future as well as vacation that is also a good method to have a good future. Will both of them spending influnce future's quality? On contrast, they will increase the quality of future, some people will fix their lesiure time to travle and they continue to work harder to make their future better, the others save the money and spend the time in house for ever, can they live better with their saving money than the pursuiters? In my view the traveller can have a better life.
  Although they save money instead of traveling can have a more stable future than the traveller in the theorism, actually the better future not only need the money but also the vaious spirits. What is the most important in life? I think thousand people will have a thousand answers, the basic one , I guess, the more happy time is the one. What can make happy in life, the material is necessary, neither the inside of mind is estimate. So travel and vacation can help you to get the happier life. Spend money on traveling and vacation can make the better future.
  The spending on traveling and vacation will not spend much of one's ownings. Currently, the confivent transporting is cheaper than ever before, which will decrease much spending. And many people will choose the avaliable place they will visit. So the spending will not be burden of futures.
  Make a happy traveling and vacation for your life better is so important that the spending money is necessary.

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

没啥修改就放上来了。。

zak_chemistryUID: 2612236

谢谢大家！！！

zak_chemistryUID: 2612236

不好依稀，搞错了！！！

zak_chemistryUID: 2612236

向kaolaliang道歉！第一次上传附件。

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

米西~

远远在笑UID: 2742022

6.19

彩色修改见附件

I fundamently agree with the assertion that(about) the way of consuming.(眼前一亮)
Nowadays, many people
live in a huge press,
（huge pressure?）so that spend(spending) time on traveling and vacation become(becomes 或者has became) their most effective way of depress（个人认为这个词直接使你杯具了，应该用reducing stress吧）.However（，）
most of them wouldn't spend all of their money on it. In my oppion, choose（choosing） these ways of consuming that should under their economy's control. （would be a wise choice）
  Travel can make people relax and fullfill their knowledge to make a better life in future as well as（正好我刚刚在琢磨as well as的用法，其实你的意思我们知道，但是as well as有部分强调的意思，细细体会就会发现不如在这里用一个平淡无奇但是准确的and） vacation （that）
is also a good method to have a good future. Will both of them（their）
spending（cost） influnce future's quality? On contrast,（On the contrary） they will increase the quality of future,
（tomorrow，增加活泼度）some people will fix their lesiure time to（fix to的意思是把...固定到...上....） travle and they continue to work harder to make their future better, the(删去...) others save the money and spend the time in house for ever, （but）can they live better with their saving money than the pursuiters(这个词...)? In my view the traveller can （加一个definitely，强调语气） have a better life.
  Although they（改成people who） save money instead of traveling can have a more stable future than the traveller in the theorism（不解释...）, actually the(删去)
better future not only need（提前，在not only之前） the（删去）
money but also the（删去） vaious spirits. What is the most important (thing)
in life? I think (a) thousand people will have a thousand answers,(.)the basic one , I guess, the more happy time is the one.(is having more happy time)
What can make happy in life, the material is necessary, (The essential thing to keep happy in life is the materia) neither the inside of mind is estimate(你杯具了...这句一出来前面两句算白讲或者白改了，明显矛盾，前面两句按照你的意思应该是：The essential thing to keep happy in life isn't  materia，but the inner spirit). So travel and vacation can help you to（删去） get the（a） happier life. Spend（ing）money on traveling and vacation can make the（a） better future.（最后两句意思重复）
  The spending on traveling and vacation will not spend much of one's ownings. Currently, the confivent（这是什么词...） transporting is cheaper than ever before, which will decrease much spending. And（also，） many people will choose the avaliable place they will（plan to） visit. So the spending will not be burden of futures.
  Make a happy traveling and vacation for your life better（提前，应该是better life） is so important that the spending money is necessary.

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

彩色修改见附件



谢谢楼上的

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8# kaolaliang

互相修改~

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1111629&page=1#pid1774091930

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

Sometimes, if you can not say anything nice to someone, you should say nothing at all.

   Do you say nice to someone at any time that is benefit for him or her? In my view the answer is no. In my view honest to friends that is one of the most precious things, which means you can directly point someone's weakness and suggest reslution about it, maybe your friends will be better than nothing to say. And the theroy that say someting is between you and your good friends, the strangers may not apply to it.
   We can make an example to judge that say nice anything to someone if he is your good friends. Alex is your best friend, he want to buy a car and need your suggestion, meanwhile you know his choice is really unfit for his requitment, under this suitation if you say yes may make him born with the car for a while. The result would be changed if you say the truth. The reason of lying to friends may be hate to hit his self-respect, thus if friends want to ask you these things, may he hear the truth and be ready for hitten by  it. So tell the truth to your good friends is not a bad choice.
   Then what about other who is not your friends? The boss, colleague, someone sit next on you somewhere, and so many people may ask you the question about all kinds of suggestions. So how to choose your answer become the quzzle. The answer to boss may under the  qestion's and boss's thinking to conclude, and the same as the colleagues. In my view talk to others in this question may judge your caree life.
   Answering is one aspect of taking's, talking is connection between you and the society. How to strengthen the skill is become more and more important.

FFFMZJBUID: 2479141

Sometimes, if you can not say anything nice to someone, you should say nothing at all.

   Do you say nice to someone at any time that is benefit for him or her? In my view the answer is no. In my v ...
kaolaliang 发表于 2010-6-22 15:58

请把WORD附件放上来，这次作文我和你分到一组了。

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

请把WORD附件放上来，这次作文我和你分到一组了。
FFFMZJB 发表于 2010-6-23 08:52

放迟了，不好意思

peggy890UID: 2812709

   Do you say nice to someone at any time that may benefit for him or her? In my view the answer is no. In my view honest to friends is one of the most precious things, which means you can directly point someone's weakness and offer your personal suggestions about it, maybe your friends will feel much better than nothing to say. And the argument(没有到theory的程度) that say someting is between you and your good friends, the strangers may not apply to it.
8 i9 e) Y/ J+ N! U/ U0 @1 z   We can make an example to judge that say something nice（anything不能这么用哦） to someone if he is your good friends.（以下的例子换成自己的会更有说服力） Alex is your best friend, he want to buy a car and need your suggestion, meanwhile you know his choice is really unfit for his requirement, under this situation if you say yes may make him born with the car for a while. The result would be changed if you say the truth. The reason of lying to friends may be hate to hit his self-respect, thus if friends want to ask you these things, may he hear the truth and be ready for hitten(chiglish味道有点浓，不如换一种说法temporarily feel frustrated from your judgement )
by  it. So tell the truth to your good friends is never(强调一下更好) a bad choice.
0 s3 v! V: p! P7 q" A   Then what about other who is not your friends? The（没必要用定冠词） boss, colleague, someone sit next on you somewhere, and so many people may ask you the question about all kinds of suggestions. So how to choose your answer become the quzzle. The answer to boss may under the  question's and boss's thinking to conclude, and the same as the colleagues. In my view talking to others in this question may judge your caree life(这个理由好像逻辑联系有点牵强).: r5 k, Q; C$ u' v, L$ P6 `
   Answering is one aspect of taking's, talking is connection between you and the society. How to strengthen the skill is become more and more important（结尾过于匆忙，建议对上文进行总结）
整体结构还可以，就是字数有点少，而且过于chiglish
个人意见，仅供参考
加油哦


因为我电脑这边没有插入附件的按钮，只能这样发了，多多包涵

FFFMZJBUID: 2479141

加油吧。