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[未归类] candyleen的作文本 [复制链接]

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发表于 2010-7-24 20:17:41 |显示全部楼层
candyleen的第一篇, 请各路英雄豪杰多多指点了【7.24】

Sports teach people lessons about life

Sports can be seen as a miniature of one’s life, which can teach us a lot just as a teacher. When you take part in a sport, feeling carefully all the process, you will find great principles of life.
People become wise only when they experience things. I think only when we put all of one’s on a life progress, not only the physical body but also the mental part of a person, can we learn lessons about life. Such a progress will involve the things people do really care about; being afraid to lose and then what happen will just be sculpt in people’s brain teaching them how to go on in the later life. That is what we call the lessons of life. As for sports, when we take part in a sport activity, usually people have their body and mind all working for success or other things. Such a progress is just like the course of life, people will get pain when they lose and think about giving up when they are out of energy. They will feel the pain not only from their body but also their mind, only after that the pain will teach us the principles about life. Sports and life have many characters in common, especially the progress people are feeling, that is the reason we will learn life lessons from sports.
For example, sports will tell us no matter how tired, we should not give up; only in this case, we can have the possibility to succeed. It is the same with life, there are no difficulties can keep us from success if only we insist on it. In addition to this, the sports also give the best explanation of success and failure for life. When we fall down in a race, it does not mean we have failed. If we choose to climb up to continue and get to the finish, we are the heroes. So when it comes to life, it is also true that we will be heroes even if we do not make any great achievement but just come over the difficulties in our life instead of giving up.
Although there are things about life we can’t learn from sports, it’s sagacious for us to use the lessons we learn from sports to teach our life. And it’s true that sports teach people lessons about life.

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发表于 2010-7-25 08:59:17 |显示全部楼层
亲爱的同学 如果下次能有个word版本的附件上去 就更好了哈!
作文正在看着呢 稍等
也请同学对我的作文不要留情
God Bless me!
我想我可以的!是一定可以的!是一定一定不错的!

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发表于 2010-7-25 10:09:25 |显示全部楼层
看完了  
有问题找我

你也辛苦哈 加油!

7-24-candyleen的作文批改.doc

35 KB, 下载次数: 13

God Bless me!
我想我可以的!是一定可以的!是一定一定不错的!

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发表于 2010-7-25 11:20:17 |显示全部楼层
3# longxue26
谢谢,谢谢,我的作文水平实在是。。。很感激,你这么认真的帮我指出这么多不足~我要好好加油努力了~

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发表于 2010-7-25 13:17:56 |显示全部楼层

Sports teach people lessons about life


Sports can be seen as a miniature of one’s life, which can teach us a lot just as a teacher(does). When you take part in a sport, feeling carefully (这个词不妥,建议throughly)all the process, you will find great principles of life." s  \: R2 G+ l1 D* }' P
People become wise only when(太绝对了) they experience things. I think only when we put all of one’s on a life progress,(啥意思不懂) not only the physical body but also the mental part of a person, can we learn lessons about life. Such a progress will involve the things people do really care about; being afraid to lose and then what happen will just be sculpt in people’s brain teaching them how to go on in the later life. That is what we call the lessons of life. As for sports, when we take part in a sport activity, usually people have their body and mind all working for success or other things. Such a progress is just like the course of life, people will get pain when they lose and think about giving up when they are out of energy. They will feel the pain not only from their body but also their mind, only after that the pain will teach us the principles about life. Sports and life have many characters in common, especially the progress people are feeling, that is the reason we will learn life lessons from sports你这段讲点太深奥了,看得云里雾里,其实就想要说,what we experiencing in sports just reflect our experiences in lives 建议用更简洁的话来组织好点。- d4 U( ()你d$ O  z5 t' f
For example, sports will tell us no matter how tired we are , we should not give up; only in this case, we can have the possibility to succeed. It is the same with life, there are no difficulties can keep us from success if only we insist on it. In addition to this, the sports also give the best explanation of success and failure for life. When we fall down in a race, it does not mean we have failed. If we choose to climb up to continue and get to the finish(??), we are the heroes. So when it comes to life, it is also true that we will be heroes even if we do not make any great achievement but just come over the difficulties in our life instead of giving up.7 j3 O0 s7 o3 }& s: Q
Although there are things about life we can’t learn from sports, it’s sagacious for us to use the lessons we learn from sports to teach our life. And it’s true that sports teach people lessons about life.


说理太多,应该多举些例子。。。。
mlgb,    i am tortured by  ibt

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发表于 2010-7-25 13:48:28 |显示全部楼层
5# lxg198607
谢谢谢谢了~

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发表于 2010-7-25 15:09:49 |显示全部楼层
4# candyleen

没有没有 你写的挺好的 讲道理讲的很好 就是少点例子 这不是什么大毛病
放松地写 没问题的
咱不是得写出ets爱看的文章嘛
我写的也不咋地 大家都加油
God Bless me!
我想我可以的!是一定可以的!是一定一定不错的!

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发表于 2010-7-26 21:25:57 |显示全部楼层
7# longxue26
恩呀,我们都加油~

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发表于 2010-7-28 11:46:27 |显示全部楼层

As coming to the 21st century, we enter an era of media especially of advertisement. We have to admit advertiser have a quite important role in the media-developing play. As for the effect of advertisement, it’s necessary to talk about the link between advertisement and human’s eating habits. Quite many people have the opinion that advertisement is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits, but I can’t agree with that.  I’d like to say there are kinds of things affecting people’s eating habits, it’s not reasonable to focus our attention only on advertisement. Also a coin has its two sides. Advertisement does harm to eating habits as well as give it advantage.
First, there are a lot of reasons causing unhealthy eating habits such as the limit of time for people to cook. Personally speaking, I think the limit of time play a more important role causing the bad eating habits. Nowadays the high speed of development forces us people to squeeze more time for work, so it is unavoidable for people’s time to cook cut down. For example, in my mother’s childhood, my grandma would spend two or three hours to prepare dinner for the family, and it was common to have delicious and nutritional dishes. While, in my childhood, it’s unreality for me to ask for my mum to cook except on festivals, the most often thing to eat for dinner is fast food, poor of healthy composition as well as in taste. I think that why in the modern society people are sent to the hospital more often and varies diseases attack younger. And if people want to have a powerful body, the most important measure to take is to have good eating habits, which mean spend more time to cook.
In addition, advertisement also has some benefits for people’s eating habits. We can take advantage, if only we get a comprehensive attitude towards it. We should know that the aim of ad id to attract customers’ attention. So the information from it can’t be the same with the reality. So we should be a wise customer, and gain the ability to pick out the advertiser’s lies and benefit from the real and useful information. For example, when we go to KFC next time we should not pay attention on the beautiful pictures, but have a look at the brochure with a suggestion for a good daily dietary plan.

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发表于 2010-7-28 16:01:37 |显示全部楼层
9# candyleen 上面是7.27的作业~

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发表于 2010-7-28 19:26:57 |显示全部楼层

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发表于 2010-7-28 21:25:16 |显示全部楼层
7.27
Edited by 韩小夕

请楼主多多拍小夕的文!

7.27改candy、.doc

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发表于 2010-7-29 19:28:04 |显示全部楼层
楼主有空的时候请去改小夕的文!!

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发表于 2010-7-29 20:31:05 |显示全部楼层
7.29号作业,欢迎大家多多指点,多提问题,共同进步啦~
We should try different jobs when we are young,请下载下面的链接

Young people should try several different jobs before they take a long term career..doc

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发表于 2010-7-29 20:38:34 |显示全部楼层
13# 梦的弃儿

刚看到,这就改去~哈哈~

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