7.27作文

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

这是我的作文 麻烦分租 谢谢你啊

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits
370 words

Recently, the issue of the effect of advertising on human's daily eating habits has been in the limelight. Contrary to the widely accepted belief that it is people themselves that choose how and when to eat, I argue that people's unhealthy eating habits are definitely due to advertising mostly. Here, I intend to present my resons as follows:

No one will deny that the infulence of media on not only individuals, but also the whole socety is noticeable. That is, the effect of media, especially the advertising, on one’s daily life is powerful. For instance, when people walk on the street, particularly on the downtown, a large number of advertisings are posted on the buses, restarants and shopping malls, and you could even receive the advertising, like leaflet. When they back home with an exhausted body and open the TV, they will find much more commercials. Therefore, advertising penetrate every place in our society, and you are not able to escape it.

Aside from the enormous influence of advertising, another point I would like to claim is that some promoting methods used by companies, like lowing the prices of products and delivering free presents, will result in changes of eating habits. To illustrate, suppose one planed to eat some Chinese food as lunch. Suddenly, he finds a huge advertising posted on the front door of Mcdonald's, which says all the foods are 30% discount off in this week. Then the man is likely to eat hamburgers and fried chicken in M instead of the much healthier Chinese food.

Futhermore, it is not hard to find that a great number of companies are inclined to take advantage of famous actors, singers and popular catoon characters to promote their products. Admittedly, people should have their standards to judge which advertising is objective, and which one is exaggerated. However, the children are lack of such commonsense and they will easily be affected by this kind of advertisings. If a child who catches a sight of his favorite cartoon charater-Micky Mouse- being printed on the package of some instant noodles, he will ask his mother to buy it generally.

In conlusion, from what has been discussed above we may safely draw the conclusion that advertising has the most influencial aspects on the eating habits of people. Although people have the capablity of judging whether the advertising is true or not to some degree, many people would lose their direction when they receiving the attracting information from advertising.

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

自己顶一下~~~求拍板砖啊~~各位！

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

7.31
Recently, the issue of the besy way to gain insight of a foreign country has been in the limelight. Contratry to widely accepted idea that reading newspapers and magazines is the most effecient and cheapest way to know a foreign country, I argue that only taking advantage of the resourses of newspapars and magazines is not enough to know a country well. Here, I intend to present my reasons as follows:

No one will deny that the contents in both newspapars and periodicals are really limited. That is, it is impossible to include every aspect of a foreign country concretely so that the readers just realize one or two parts about the country. For instance, even a professinal magazines about global travel does not have the capability of introducing a country thoroughly, like a Chinese magazine "Travellers". The magazine published a article about Japan, people just can see several photographs and paragraphs about architectures and cusine. From this, the readers would have difficulties to understand the Japan very well, maybe they just have some abstract images.

Aside from the limited contents, another shortcomings I have to mention is that plenty of subjective and personal perspectives will definitely influence people's views about the foreign country. To illustrate,
once I read a article about China, which said that the country have not the capability of holding the 29th Olympic Games economically and technically. At first, I believed this point and I did not have much confidence that China will successfully hold the Games. However, when I was watching the opening ceremony of the Games, I was totally shocked since the ceremony was breathtaking and peerless.

Moreover, the best way to realize a foreign country’s every aspect is to live there for a long time. In other words, only if one can be a resident of the foreign country will he or she truly realize the culture, language, history as well as economy of the country. Admittedly, people have to spend several years and totally change their life style. Nevertheless, it is the most direct and comprehensive way to know a foreign country. For example, the novelist Zhang Ailing spent 2 years living in a small town of Africa since she intended to write a novel about the stories of a African family.

From what has been discussed above we may safely draw the conclusion that the best way to understand a foreign country is not
just by reading newspapers and magazines. The reasons probably have a lot to do with the abstract articles and pictures, the unobjective ideas as well as a more preferable way .

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

7.29
求各位狠狠批改啊~~~~求Candy 帮我批改，好吗？？谢谢、
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young people should try several different jobs before they take a long term career.


Recently, the issue of career programming has been in the limelight. Contratry to widely accepted belief that young people should first seek a job which she or he can work for a long-term, I argue that it is very essential for people to try different kinds of jobs before they settled down. Here, I intend to present my reasons as follows:

No one will deny that the direction of seeking job is the most crucial step for young people. What I mean is that it is better to take time to find a certain job that is fit the person. Everyone is unique in the world,and they will not truely realize what kind of job is suitable for them and what field of job will arouse one’s interest. According a recent survey, 65% of the undergraduate students in Shanghai, who had found jobs, said that they were not able to focus their attention on and contribute much to the current jobs. This indicates that they were not able to find the suitable jobs they should do.

Moreover, different kind of work experience would assist one to grasp comprehensive knowledge. Nowadays, the competition among people has becoming more and more fierce, and there is no doubt the best way to be a comprehensive person is to work in different work fields. To illustrate, if a person who not only worked in the department of human resourse, but also was the clerk of administration department and marketing department, who will suspect that the person is more competitive for being promoted by the company. Of couse, she or he would not worry about finding better job in other companies, sicne she or he has more advanteges--- rich experience and professional knowledge than other people.

Making friends with those who have diverse background and professional knowlwdge would be beneficial for people to broad their horizon. Obviously, when one person is sufferring from some spiny problems and has not capability of solving it, a friend who work in that field would be more helpful. Admittedly, the person could learn this kind of knowledge by himself so that he dose not have to ask for help from other people. However, everyone’s time and energy is so limited, no one can work out all problems without any difficulty. If they worked together before, which would provide more opportunities to solve that problem.

In conclusion, from what has been discussed above we may safely draw the conclusion that trying distinct kinds of jobs before taking a long term career would be much better.

Editors4WritersUID: 2866341

4# shiyingjingjing

不错，你写的很好。你的作文还有一点语法和风格上的问题，你把红色的句子改好后，我可以提供一些修改的建议或直接帮你修改。

Recently, the issue of career programming has been in the limelight. Contrary to widely accepted belief that young people should first seek a job which she or he can work for a long-term, I argue that it is very essential for people to try different kinds of jobs before they settled down. Here, I intend to present my reasons as follows:

No one will deny that the direction of seeking job is the most crucial step for young people. What I mean is that it is better to  take [需要限定词] time to find a certain job that is fit the person. Everyone is unique in the world, and they will not truly realize what kind of job is suitable for them and what field of job will arouse one’s interest. According [需要限定词] a recent survey, 65% of the undergraduate students in Shanghai, who had found jobs, said that they were not able to focus their attention on and contribute much to the current jobs. This indicates that they were not able to find the suitable jobs they should do.9 \! U' N8 p9 A

Moreover, different kind of work experience would assist one to grasp comprehensive knowledge ("comprehensive knowledge" 是什么东西？ 给大家比方说). Nowadays, the competition among (年轻) people / has becoming more and more fierce / , and there (三个错误) is no doubt the best way to be a comprehensive person ("comprehensive person" 是什么样的人？ 这个不是很标准) is to work in different work fields. To illustrate, if a person who not only worked in the department of human resource, but also was the clerk of administration department and marketing department, who will suspect that the person is more competitive for being promoted by the company (这句子太长, 这是个大问题). Of course, she or he would not worry about finding [需要限定词] better job in other companies, since she or he has more advantages --- rich experience and professional knowledge than other people.

Making friends with those who have diverse background and professional knowledge would be beneficial for people to broaden their horizons. Obviously, when one person is suffering from some spiny problems (什么?) and has not capability of solving it (编辑), a friend who works in that field would be more helpful. Admittedly, the person could learn this kind of knowledge by himself, so that he does not have to ask for help from others people. However, everyone’s time and energy is so limited, so no one can work out all problems without any difficulty. If they worked together before, which would provide more opportunities to solve that problem.

In conclusion, from what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that trying distinct kinds of jobs before taking a long term career would be much better.

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

真的是很感谢啊 ~~~~我会好好看的~~谢谢:loveliness:

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young people should try several different jobs before they take a long term career.


Recently, the issue of career goal has been in the limelight. Contratry to widely accepted idea that looking for a long-term career after graduation would be safe to young people, I argue that it is very essential for young people to try different fields of jobs before they settle down. Here, I intend to present my reasons as follows:

No one will deny that the direction of seeking job is the most crucial step for young people. That is to say, it is better to take much time to find suitable jobs for themselves. Everyone is unique in the world, they will not truely realize what kind of job is suitable for them and which jobs they really want to do. According a recent survey, 65% of undergraduate students in Shanghai, who had certain jobs, said that they were not able to focus their attention the current jobs. This indicates that they were not able to find suitable jobs.

Moreover, different fields of work experience would assist one to grasp multi-knowledge.(comprehensive我想表达全面综合的意思) Nowadays, according to the cut-throat competition among young people, there is no doubt the best way to put their head and shoulders over others比别人更胜一筹 is to work in different work fields. To illustrate, if a man who worked in the department of human resourse，administration as well as marketing, who will suspect that the person is more competitive for being promoted by the company. Of couse, he would not worry about finding high-paying job, challenging and promising position in other companies, sicne she or he has more advanteges--- rich experience and professional knowledge than others.

Making friends with those who have diverse background and professional knowlwdge求改……
would be beneficial for people to broaden their horizons. Obviously, when one person is sufferring from some thorny棘手的 problems and does not have capability of solving it, a friend who works in that field would be much helpful. Admittedly, he could learn this kind of knowledge by himself , so he dose not have to ask for help from others. However, everyone’s time and energy is limited, so no one can deal with all kinds of problems without any difficulty. If they worked together before, which would provide more opportunities to solve that problem求改.

In conclusion, from what has been discussed above we may safely arrive at the conclusion that trying distinct fields of jobs before taking a long term career would be 啊…我没看出问题啊much better.


你好！很高兴你能帮我改作文~~ 从中我也发现了自己的很多问题，比如用词不准确，句式糅杂等。真的是太谢谢你的帮助了~~另外我想问下，你说的风格问题如何能做好呢？好像很抽象的问题。
我根据你提的建议把文章修改了，麻烦你再帮我看看好吗？有几个句子我也想不出该怎样表达比较好，帮我改下好吗？

我觉得我的作文还是不过关，不过我会继续加强的!!一起努力

梦的弃儿UID: 2840846

你31号作文都没写……

梦的弃儿UID: 2840846

汗= =我找到了……
在29号上面哎……

ttuuttuuUID: 2299729

No one will deny that the contents in both newspapars and periodicals ( 這個字與maganizes有些不同) are really limited. That is, it is impossible to include every aspect of a foreign country concretely so that the readers just realize one or two parts about the country. For instance, even a professinal magazines about global travel does not have the capability of introducing a country thoroughly, like a Chinese magazine "Travellers". The magazine published a article about Japan, people just can see several photographs and paragraphs about architectures and cusine. From this, the readers would have difficulties to understand the Japan very well. Maybe they just have some abstract images.


Aside from the limited contents, another shortcomings I have to mention is that plenty of subjective and personal perspectives will definitely influence people's views about the foreign country. To illustrate,) once I read a article about China, which said that the country have not the capability of holding the 29th Olympic Games economically and technically. At first, I believed this point and I did not have much confidence that China will successfully hold the Games. However, when I was watching the opening ceremony of the Games, I was totally shocked since the ceremony was breathtaking and peerless.


Moreover, the best way to realize a foreign country’s every aspect is to live there for a long time. In other words(這邊用in other words不太對), only if one can be a resident of the foreign country will he or she truly realize the culture, language, history as well as economy of the country. Admittedly, people have to spend several years and totally change their life style. Nevertheless, it is the most direct and comprehensive way to know a foreign country. For example, the novelist Zhang Ailing spent 2 years living in a small town of Africa since she intended to write a novel about the stories of a
the African family. (有點離題了，題目是問說是不是最好的方法，如果不是，是為什麼? 當然也可以這樣寫，但前面要先把條件說一下，例如:其他方式才是比報紙雜誌更好的方法 <==硬是與報紙雜誌扯上邊，然後接著你寫的就不會太凸兀了)*


From what has been discussed above we may safely draw the conclusion that the best way to understand a foreign country is not just by reading newspapers and magazines. The reasons probably have a lot to do with the abstract articles and pictures, the unobjective ideas as well as a more preferable way . (這如果是套模版的  還打錯字句點多空一格 該打屁屁了)


紅字表拼字錯
綠色文法錯

梦的弃儿UID: 2840846

改完了。
请LZ也尽快修改小夕的文吧~~

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

谢谢哈~~~我会好好看的

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

8．3
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? A job with more vacation time but a low salary is better than a job with a high salary but less vacation time.

Several years ago, a survey analyzed that statistics and indicated that 65% of the undergraduates prefer to find a job with of high salary and less spare time. Undoubtedly, high salary do make it possible for people to live at ease. However, as far as I concern, a low-paying job with more vacation time would be more desirable and beneficial.

No one will deny that physical condition is one of the most essential goals for everyone. If one could have more time to do exercise in the outdoor, he would have more chances to be healthy. For example, my uncle, who lives hand to mouth, often dose aerobic exercise in a park in the morning and also has time to hiking with his closed friends in the weekend. He never suffers the pain of arthritis as well as diabetes, which are very common in other people in that age. Hence, everyone could take advantage of more vacation time do build a good body, and which will be beneficial for he/she to pursue a more pleasant life.

Moreover, spending more time with one's family would strengthen the relationship between them. The pace of modern society is beginning more and more rapid, which lead to the fact that parents spend less time to accompany their children. However, what the children really concern about is not the gorgeous clothes or advanced toys but the chance that parents could stay with them. According to a recent survey made in Shanghai, 24% of the primary students said that their fathers were busy on jobs and only spent less than 1 hour playing with them each day, so they trust their mothers more and loved to play with them. Even worse, most of these students are introverted and pessimistic in their daily lives.

Another point I have to mention is that people with more vacation time could do the things they really would like to do, such as pursuing hobbits. That is, people would have more free time to add color to their tedious and monotonous lives. For instance, people could spend a few days to travel to foreign countries, attend more clubs about fishing, singing, dancing or calligraphy and go to cinemas to watch movies. Admittedly, a job with high salary could enable a man to attend these entertainments without worrying about the expense. Nevertheless, the real point is that they have no time to have other activities.

All in all, taking into account these factors we safely may arrive at the conclusion that a job with more spare time but low salary is much better that handsomely-paid job with less time to do other things, although both viewpoints have their own merits. After all, the value of money is to bring people more joyous and comfortable lives.

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

8．3
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? A job with more vacation time but a low salary is better than a job with a high salary but less vacation time.

Several years ago, a survey analyzed that statistics and indicated that 65% of the undergraduates prefer to find a job with of high salary and less spare time. Undoubtedly, high salary do make it possible for people to live at ease. However, as far as I concern, a low-paying job with more vacation time would be more desirable and beneficial.

No one will deny that physical condition is one of the most essential goals for everyone. If one could have more time to do exercise in the outdoor, he would have more chances to be healthy. For example, my uncle, who lives hand to mouth, often dose aerobic exercise in a park in the morning and also has time to hiking with his closed friends in the weekend. He never suffers the pain of arthritis as well as diabetes, which are very common in other people in that age. Hence, everyone could take advantage of more vacation time do build a good body, and which will be beneficial for he/she to pursue a more pleasant life.

Moreover, spending more time with one's family would strengthen the relationship between them. The pace of modern society is beginning more and more rapid, which lead to the fact that parents spend less time to accompany their children. However, what the children really concern about is not the gorgeous clothes or advanced toys but the chance that parents could stay with them. According to a recent survey made in Shanghai, 24% of the primary students said that their fathers were busy on jobs and only spent less than 1 hour playing with them each day, so they trust their mothers more and loved to play with them. Even worse, most of these students are introverted and pessimistic in their daily lives.

Another point I have to mention is that people with more vacation time could do the things they really would like to do, such as pursuing hobbits. That is, people would have more free time to add color to their tedious and monotonous lives. For instance, people could spend a few days to travel to foreign countries, attend more clubs about fishing, singing, dancing or calligraphy and go to cinemas to watch movies. Admittedly, a job with high salary could enable a man to attend these entertainments without worrying about the expense. Nevertheless, the real point is that they have no time to have other activities.

All in all, taking into account these factors we safely may arrive at the conclusion that a job with more spare time but low salary is much better that handsomely-paid job with less time to do other things, although both viewpoints have their own merits. After all, the value of money is to bring people more joyous and comfortable lives.

shiyingjingjingUID: 2858447

8．5
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Younger school children (ages five to ten) should be required to study art and music in addition to math, science, history and language.

Recently, the issue of subjects selection for younger school children has been in the limelight.The majority of people holds that it is unnecessary to art and music class since children's attention should be paid on these subjects,like math, science, history and language.In contrast, I argue that art and music classes should be required to study. Here, I intend to present my reasons as follows:

No one will deny that children sometimes need help choosing what is best for them. Primary school is a time to experiment, to expand children's horizions and find the things one is good at and what one enjoy.Some students might be suprised to discover artistic and musical talent within themselves. For instance, if schools provide students with more opportunities to get to know the powerness and beauty of D's excellent paiting-- , maybe it will arouse interest of some students and then the interest may intimulate their talent. Obviously, students need a access to the art world and schools should spare no efforts to assist them.

Moreover, art and music class make it possible to childern to be well- gromed, and which is extremely essential for them to pursue their dreams. That is, learning about music and art theory will give them the background knoeledge needed to appreciate the fine arts in the future. To illustrate, if a child has some basic knowledge of several musicians, he would have the capability of not only appreaciating the mucicians' music but also realizing the hidden and interesting stories behind the music. I believe that would be an incredible and fatastic experience.

Finally, it is unhealthy for children to spend much more time on study. In other words, children could find an outlet to relief themselves in music and art classes. Admittedly, learning about these knowledge will occupy students' time on the main courses study more orless. However, the real point is that music and art class will help chidren relax themselves. For instance, during the art class, students may allowed to appreaciate a good movie,such as the movie "Beauty and Beast" and "Spiderman". In this way, children could truly release the pressure from tests and assingments.

All in all, taking into account all these factors we may safely draw the conclusion that music and art study should be the compulsary courses in younger children schools, although these classes would definitely occupy the time of children on other  subjects's study.