1.14独立作文

坠坠芙蓉影UID: 2815408

Do you agree with the following statement? Good looks and dresses are more inportant than good ideas.





Rarely does anyone not wish to possess a good look and dress. On the road of pursuing them, people rush to surgeries and departments, too impatient to wait for face-lifting and purchase. However, I want to stress that though good looks and dresses play a positive role, good ideas are more important than them.



Admittedly, beautiful appearance and dresses have some use. They could leave a good first impression on other people. Because when two person run into each other, before talking, both of them will look the other up and down. What do they look at? Of course the other side's looking and dresses. If you have big bright eyes with a Chanel dress, men will fall in love with you, while women will be jealous of you. Moreover, good looking and dresses can more or less boost one's confidence. No one feel bad when s/he is walking on the street and almost every other people stares at her/him, appreciating her/him gorgeousness.



Yet, the effect caused by good looks and dresses cannot stay long. At the aspect of good-looking, everyone knows a truth that people, no matter how young and beautiful s/he is, will inevitably become older and older. At that time, pretty face will disappear. As for brilliant dresses, the world is so big that no one dare say her/his dresses are the most brilliant among all the people living on the Earth. There must be someone whose skirts are more delicate, whose shoes' colors are more diverse. And as long as you bump into that person some day, your pride will collapse immediately if good dresses are the only bases of it.



Now that good-looking and beautiful dresses cannot be trully depended on, are we doomed to be losers with discouragement? No, we are not. Because we have another powerful weapons -good ideas- that can definitely change our images even though we haven't a pretty face. Putting forward some good ideas is very meaningful. It stands for intelligence. Imagine a situation as followed: a group of people are holding a meeting. They are trying hard to tackle a difficult problem, but it is so sophisticated that even general manager knits her/his brows. I am a new employee without eye-catching appearance and luxurious dresses. But I own a clever mind. After cogitating this problem, I show my intelligence, proposing a wise solution and solving that obstacle. Though I don't win a deep first impression, I win the more valuable thing -- the real appreciation from my boss and colleagues. Plus, such kind of intelligence will increase instead of dissipating as the days go by, so people needn't fear.



To sum up, we should keep in mind that good ideas are more significant than good looks and dresses. Therefore we need spend more time on developing our minds rather than our faces and clothes.


感谢帮我批改的同学^^

gamyUID: 2748678

学习~

laura88sUID: 2777004

1# 坠坠芙蓉影
Do you agree with the following statement? Good looks and dresses are more inportant than good ideas.. u( z3 p( O$ [, d6 u, k

     Rarely does anyone not wish to possess a good look and dress. On the road of pursuing them, people rush to surgeries and departments (departments和surgey并列？ 改成两个动作或者两个地点会舒服些) too impatient to wait for face-lifting and purchase. However, I want to stress that though good looks and dresses play a positive role, good ideas are more important than them.9 c% i0 X) S* w5 w2 o

     Admittedly, beautiful appearance and dresses have some use. They could leave a good first impression on other people. Because when two person run into each other, before talking, both of them will look the other up and down. What do they look at? Of course the other side's looking and dresses. If you have big bright eyes with a Chanel dress, men will fall in love with you, while women will be jealous of you. Moreover, good looking and dresses can more or less boost one's confidence. No one (would) feel bad when s/he is walking on the street and almost every other people stares at her/him, appreciating her/him gorgeousness. (No one would feel unpleasant to see such a person walking along the street; no one would take their eyes from her and stop appreciating her gorgeousness.) 4 h+ u( Z! a% b: z- c$ K) i5

     Yet, the effect caused by good looks and dresses cannot stay long. At the aspect of good-looking, everyone knows a truth that people, no matter how young and beautiful s/he is, will inevitably become older and older. At that time, pretty face will disappear. As for brilliant dresses, the world is so big that no one dare say her/his dresses are the most brilliant among all the people living on the Earth. There must be someone whose skirts are more delicate, whose shoes' colors are more diverse. (There must be someone whose skirts’ cutting are more delicate, whose shoes’ colors are more fancier. 觉得关于鞋子颜色的形容与前面的delicate类似会更妥一些，当然，仅供参考。) And as long as you bump into that person some day, your pride will collapse immediately if good dresses are the only bases of it.) ~+ g( k. r% K4 L

     Now that good-looking and beautiful dresses cannot be truly depended on, are we doomed to be losers with discouragement? No, we are not. Because we have another powerful weapons -good ideas- that can definitely change our images even though we haven't a pretty face. Putting forward some good ideas is very meaningful. It stands for intelligence.（用linker讲明这两句的逻辑关系会更清楚些）Imagine a situation as followed: a group of people are holding a meeting. They are trying hard to tackle a difficult problem, but it is so sophisticated that even general manager knits her/his brows. I am a new employee without eye-catching appearance and luxurious dresses. But I own a clever mind. After cogitating this problem, I show my intelligence, proposing a wise solution and solving that obstacle. Though I don't win a deep first impression, I win the more valuable thing -- the real appreciation from my boss and colleagues. Plus, such kind of intelligence will increase instead of dissipating as the days go by, so people needn't fear.（我没理解错的话应该是such kind of impression……, so there is nothing to be fear about.）

     To sum up, we should keep in mind that good ideas are more significant than good looks and dresses. Therefore we need spend more time on developing our minds rather than our faces and clothes.


现在的状态不能上传附件，修改格式什么的花了一些时间。

我喜欢开头，强势不做作。=）

感觉想法听好的，只是欠缺一点润色，包含同类信息的句子可以再安排得紧凑些（比如讲boss 开会那里），还有就是平行结构的使用个别需要改正。加油！

PS：今天的作文计划出了些小意外，明天我会贴上，如果有时间的话能希望多多指教。

From. Laura