issue36 唉，我终于写出来了，怕了历史了，欢迎互拍，

ahqiuUID：207682

Issue 36
——题目——
The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not their contemporaries.
——正文——
Before discussing the complex issue, it is necessary to analyze the process of evaluating the greatness of individuals. As far as I concerned, greatness is nothing but an objective word to evaluate people’s contribution to human society, whereas the process of evaluation is a subjective one, which tends to be limited by the recognition of people and the background of society. In this sense, I fundamentally agree with the author that the greatness of individuals should be decided by those who live after them, for the evaluation of our ancestors is relatively fair and based on a wilder comparison. However, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries, either.
.
Firstly, in history some people's theories, works and activities were beyond the cognitive ability of their contemporaries, so that they were less likely to be judged impartially. Take Van Gogh for example, he only sold one piece of painting in his life and led a miserable life, for few artists who lived in his time could understand his woks, not to mention the populace. On the contrary, it is also the limitation of recognition that made people run into blindly veneration of the so-called authority, and made distorted evaluation. For instance, in history people have once worshiped their national heroes like Napoleon, Stalin, Mao Zedong and so on. Although these people made great contributions to their country to some extent, that kind of worship badly distort the value of human society and baffle the development of it. In this sense, it is indispensable to reevaluate these great giants in history.

Secondly, the pivotal factor of deciding the greatness of a person is whether his ideas, activities or works make great contributions to the development of our society. In this respect, people who live after him may evaluate him more scientifically by comparing vertically and horizontally. A compelling example is that the laws of motion was once regarded as a general principle that suitable to large part of the physical world, however its limitation was proved by the theory of reality. Ever since that, the authoritative place of Newton in physics has been shaken by Enstein, and also the evaluation of him has been corrected. Furthermore, in fact, there is a long period of time between a theory coming into being and its application to human society, so its true value may not keep a pace with the theory. It is when the theory of relativity applied to modern science and technology, including cosmology and space travel that people know the true value of Enstein and his theory. And just imagine that as the development of scientific technology, his theory may put into use in a much larger scale, at that time, people may modify the evaluation of him, and vice versa.

Although the evaluation of one's contemporaries often tends to be unfair, it is meaningful to put some emphasis on it, for it testified the influence of one’s theories, works, or activities. We will not take too far to see an example of Aristotle. Despite that he made some mistake in his methods and doctrines which may mislead people's mind, his thought deeply impact the people who live in his time and it help to shape the value and common sense in his time. By making reference to the past evaluation which made by their contemporaries, we may truly apprehend the greatness of him in his period.

To sum up, I have to admit that the evaluation of people who lived after the great persons tend to be more objective, for their contribution to human society may be not fully understand by their contemporaries, however, we should not dismiss the evaluation of their contemporaries, for it impart us the certain person’s influence of his society..

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-15 at 23:51 ]

cssUID：173612

fhxyweiUID：157384

Issue 36
——题目——
The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not their contemporaries.
——正文——
Before discussing the complex issue, it is necessary to analyze the process of evaluating the greatness of individuals. As far as I [am ]concerned, greatness is nothing but an objective word to evaluate people’s contribution to human society, whereas the process of evaluation is a subjective one, which tends to be limited by the recognition of people and the background of society. In this sense, I fundamentally agree with the author that the greatness of individuals should be decided by those who live after them, for the evaluation of our ancestors is relatively fair and based on a wilder comparison. However, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries, either....[大正小负的观点，开头写得很不错，阐述了你对greatness的理解和evaluation的历史局限性] [不过我建议，把However, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries, either,改成这样：Admittedly, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries thoroughly,然后把它放在in the sense的前面， 把in the sense改成 however. 这样做的原因是，一般在一个句子中however后面的内容才是强调的重点].


Firstly, in history some people's theories, works and activities were beyond the cognitive ability of their contemporaries, so that they were less likely to be judged impartially. Take Van Gogh for example, he only sold one piece of painting in his life and led a miserable life, for few artists who lived in his time could understand his woks, not to mention the populace. [正面论证写的很好]On the contrary, it is also the limitation of recognition that made people run into blindly veneration of the so-called authority, and made distorted evaluation. For instance, in history people have once worshiped their national heroes like Napoleon, Stalin, Mao Zedong and so on. Although these people made great contributions to their country to some extent, that kind of worship badly distort the value of human society and baffle the development of it. [反面论证就有点偏了，居然讲到了blindly worship得害处了,如果你说这些被contemporaries 崇拜的人被历史证明没有greatness，才算是反面论证， 况且那些人great 还是不great，你也没有给出论证，大谈对他们的盲目崇拜的害处和题目关系不大，所以这里我觉得举希特勒的例子比较好]In this sense, it is indispensable to reevaluate these great giants in history.[还好最后一句话又回到了正轨，总算没偏太远。]

Secondly, the pivotal factor of deciding the greatness of a person is whether his ideas, activities or works make great contributions to the development of our society. In this respect, people who live after him may evaluate him more scientifically by comparing vertically and horizontally.[观点很好] A compelling example is that the laws of motion was once regarded as a general principle that suitable to large part of the physical world, however its limitation was proved by the theory of reality. Ever since that, the authoritative place of Newton in physics has been shaken by Enstein, and also the evaluation of him has been corrected. Furthermore, in fact, there is a long period of time between a theory coming into being and its application to human society, so its true value may not keep a pace with the theory. It is when the theory of relativity applied to modern science and technology, including cosmology and space travel that people know the true value of Enstein and his theory. And just imagine that as the development of scientific technology, his theory may put into use in[on] a much larger scale, at that time, people may modify the evaluation of him, and vice versa.

[这一段，写得不错]

Although the evaluation of one's contemporaries often tends to be unfair, it is meaningful to put some emphasis on it, [这个不太恰当，emphasis就是强调的意思，就是重点的意思，改为 it is meaningful to take the contemporaries' views into consideration 可能好些] for it testified the influence of one’s theories, works, or activities. We will not take too far to see an example of Aristotle. Despite that he made some mistake in his methods and doctrines which may mislead people's mind, his thought deeply impact the people who live in his time and it help to shape the value and common sense in his time. By making reference to the past evaluation which made by their contemporaries, we may truly apprehend the greatness of him in his period.[仅仅举了一个例子，分析就是一句话for it testified the influence of one’s theories, works, or activities，是不是少了一点？]


To sum up, I have to admit that the evaluation of people who lived after the great persons tend to be more objective, for their contribution to human society may be not fully understand by their contemporaries, however, we should not dismiss the evaluation of their contemporaries, for it impart us the certain person’s influence of his society.[结尾也是一个however,让人感觉把重点放在了后面，我以前也患这么毛病，其实小负应当用admittedly, 大负用however]

总结：虽然个别例子和语句用得不太合适，总得来说些得很不错了，思路清晰，逻辑严谨，达到了思想性的要求。此外，语言的运用也很熟练！

[ Last edited by fhxywei on 2005-7-16 at 10:15 ]

fhxyweiUID：157384

ahqiu 什么时候考？

gshyUID：193962

我认为你Einstein, Newton的例子不太合适. 科学理论是不断发展的,而为人的greatness是可以永垂史册的.Newton无论在过去或现在都是被认为很great的.若要举Science 的例子导是Corpernius 的例子合适,可惜以被用烂了!

以下是我的Argument47, 麻烦改改
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... p;highlight=%2Bgshy

edgarluUID：203648

Issue 36
——题目——
The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not their contemporaries.
——正文——
Before discussing the complex issue, it is necessary to analyze the process of evaluating the greatness of individuals. As far as I concerned, greatness is nothing but an objective word to evaluate people’s contribution to human society, whereas the process of evaluation is a subjective one, which tends to be limited by the recognition of people and the background of society. In this sense, I fundamentally agree with the author that the greatness of individuals should be decided by those who live after them, for the evaluation of our ancestors is relatively fair and based on a wilder comparison[我怎么就是觉得这句话前后两部分连在一起很别扭，前面用them后面用our总感觉少了个interface，我以前是学计算机的，思维比较程式化。我认为得比较自然的说法应该是把后面一句改成for the comments from their offspring would be relatively fair and based on a wilder comparison. ]However, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries, either.
.
Firstly, in history some people's theories, works and activities were beyond the cognitive ability of their contemporaries, so that they were less likely to be judged impartially. Take Van Gogh for example, he only sold one piece of painting in his life and led a miserable life, for few artists who lived in his time could understand his woks, not to mention the populace. On the contrary, it is also the limitation of recognition that made people run into blindly veneration of the so-called authority, and made distorted evaluation. For instance, in history people have once worshiped their national heroes like Napoleon, Stalin, Mao Zedong and so on. Although these people made great contributions to their country to some extent, that kind of worship badly distort the value of human society and baffle the development of it. In this sense, it is indispensable to reevaluate these great giants in history. 关于反面论证的这段，我和上面拍友的意见有所分歧，因为发面论述中心点就是blindly veneration of the so-called authority，后面具体提一下害处很有必要，不过的确如果再加一句把害处联系到历史上来看，就天衣无缝了。PS：看别人写起来思路清晰就是这么容易的事，我自己写起来咋地一限时就东一锤西一棒呢？

Secondly, the pivotal factor of deciding the greatness of a person is whether his ideas, activities or works make great contributions to the development of our society. In this respect, people who live after him may evaluate him more scientifically by comparing vertically and horizontally. A compelling example is that the laws of motion was once regarded as a general principle that suitable to large part of the physical world, however its limitation was proved by the theory of reality[relativity]. Ever since that, the authoritative place of Newton in physics has been shaken by Enstein, and also the evaluation of him has been corrected[adjusted可能更好]. Furthermore, in fact, there is a long period of time between a theory coming into being and its application to human society, so its true value may not keep a pace with the theory. It is when the theory of relativity applied to modern science and technology, including cosmology and space travel that people know the true value of Enstein and his theory. And just imagine that as the development of scientific technology, his theory may put into use in a much larger scale, at that time, people may modify the evaluation of him, and vice versa. Neat and Cool，[这是我见过的作文里举得最好的一个例子，一个例子贯穿两层观点，而且还有延伸性思索，经典。]

Although the evaluation of one's contemporaries often tends to be unfair, it is meaningful to put some emphasis on it, for it testified the influence of one’s theories, works, or activities. We will not take too far to see [没有见过这样的写法，你确定不是it will not take us too far to see?]an example of Aristotle. Despite that he made some mistake in his methods and doctrines which may mislead people's mind, his thought deeply impact the people who live in his time and it help to shape the value and common sense in his time. By making reference to the past evaluation which made by their contemporaries, we may truly apprehend the greatness of him in his period.

To sum up, I have to admit that the evaluation of people who lived after the great persons tend to be more objective, for their contribution to human society may be not fully understand by their contemporaries, however, we should not dismiss the evaluation of their contemporaries, for it impart us the certain person’s influence of his society.

不知楼主是不是因为限时，最后两段写的不过是从篇幅还是文笔上来看都不如前面几段
有一个词的问题贯穿全文的，evaluation of sth. 是针对sth.的评价， 而是来自于sth.的评价，来自于应该用from
楼主值得我学习的地方颇多，还望多多交流
我下午的作文，有空指点一二
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ge=1&highlight=


[ Last edited by edgarlu on 2005-7-16 at 20:34 ]

cssUID：173612

——题目——
The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not their contemporaries.
——正文——
Before discussing the complex issue, it is necessary to analyze the process of evaluating the greatness of individuals. As far as I concerned, greatness is nothing but an objective word to evaluate people’s contribution to human society, whereas the process of evaluation is a subjective one, which tends to be limited by the recognition  精神层面的认识用cognition比较好of people and the background of society. In this sense, I fundamentally agree with the author that the greatness of individuals should be decided by those who live after them, for the evaluation of our ancestors is relatively fair and based on a wilder wider? comparison. However, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries, either.虽然长却没有废话，与下文对应也好
.
Firstly, in history some people's theories, works and activities were beyond the cognitive ability of their contemporaries, so that they were less likely to be judged impartially. Take Van Gogh for example, he only sold one piece of painting in his life and led a miserable life, for few artists who lived in his time could understand his woks, not to mention the populace. On the contrary, it is also the limitation of recognition that made people run into blindly veneration of the so-called authority, and made distorted evaluation. For instance, in history people have once worshiped their national heroes like Napoleon, Stalin, Mao Zedong and so on. Although these people made great contributions to their country to some extent, that kind of worship badly distort the value of human society and baffle the development of it. 此例跑题，文章论述是否伟大由当代人定，没问伟大由当代定有何后果，即使要论证这一点，也该另起一段，拿毛斯伟大同代人后人都承认，是不是削弱论点的说服力？In this sense, it is indispensable to reevaluate these great giants in history.

Secondly, the pivotal factor of deciding the greatness of a person is whether his ideas, activities or works make great contributions to the development of our society. 主题句没把原因说出来，后面观点不错，前面不说清，可能让人以为会和上段混在一起In this respect, people who live after him 有her may evaluate him more scientifically by comparing vertically and horizontally.横向比不是同时代人比吗？建议去掉 A compelling example is that the laws of motion was once regarded as a general principle that suitable to large part of the physical world, however its limitation was proved by the theory of reality.relativity Ever since that, the authoritative place of Newton in physics has been shaken by Enstein, and also the evaluation of him has been corrected. Furthermore, in fact, there is a long period of time between a theory coming into being and its application to human society, 精辟！so its true value may not keep a pace with the theory. It is when the theory of relativity applied to modern science and technology, including cosmology and space travel that people know the true value of Enstein and his theory. And just imagine that as the development of scientific technology, his theory may put into use in a much larger scale, at that time, people may modify the evaluation of him, and vice versa. 怎么个反法？
从两方面论证同一个事实，不错，但可能是第二层意思论证太精彩了，第一层意思论的就比下去了，显得不够透彻，anyway,FYI and still  gorgeous analysis:)

Although the evaluation of one's contemporaries often tends to be unfair, it is meaningful to put some emphasis on it, for it testified the influence of one’s theories, works, or activities. We will not take too far to see 请教这个短语什么意思？an example of Aristotle. Despite that he made some mistake in his methods and doctrines which may mislead people's mind, his thought deeply impact the people who live in his time and it help to shape 这个动词好the value and common sense in his time. By making reference to the past evaluation which made by their contemporaries, we may truly apprehend the greatness of him in his period. 个人觉得这段也不错，例子很贴切，分析少了点而已，但仅有的分析都很到位

To sum up, I have to admit that the evaluation of people who lived after the great persons tend to be more objective, for their contribution to human society may be not fully understand by their contemporaries, however, we should not dismiss the evaluation of their contemporaries, for it impart us the certain person’s influence of his society..前面都好，最后一句逻辑上不清楚，建议：for it is the evaluation that awares us ...

很棒的历史类，别怕，加油！

ahqiuUID：207682

多谢，改得那么认真，我会继续努力的
你的我明天再改吧
还有实验的说

bridgewalkerUID：208595

Issue 36
——题目——
The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not their contemporaries.
——正文——
Before discussing the complex issue, it is necessary to analyze the process of evaluating the greatness of individuals. As far as I [am] concerned, greatness is nothing but an objective word to evaluate[可以换换别的词] people’s contribution to human society, whereas the process of evaluation is a subjective one, which tends to be limited by the recognition of people and the background of society. [铺了好厚的棉被!] In this sense, I fundamentally agree with the author that the greatness of individuals should be decided by those who live after them, for the evaluation of our ancestors [predecessor是不是更好?] is relatively fair and based on a wilder [wider?] comparison. However, people should not ignore the evaluation of their contemporaries, either[是不是该用neither?].
.
Firstly, in history some people's theories, works and activities were beyond the cognitive ability of their contemporaries, so that they were less likely to be judged impartially. Take Van Gogh for example, he only sold one piece of painting in his entire life and led a miserable life[建议根前面合并], for few artists who lived in his time could understand his works, not to mention the populace. [这个例子很好但展开不够，有点儿堆论据的感觉。最好把Van Gogh的命运与comtemporaries的不识货进一步紧扣。] On the contrary, it is also the limitation of recognition that made people run into blindly veneration of the so-called authority, and made distorted evaluation. For instance, in history people have once worshiped their national heroes like Napoleon, Stalin, Mao Zedong and so on. Although these people made great contributions to their country to some extent, that kind of worship badly distort the value of human society and baffle the development of it. [这个例子用得或者展开得有点牵强] In this sense, it is indispensable to reevaluate these great giants in history.

Secondly, the pivotal factor of deciding the greatness of a person is whether his ideas, activities or works make great contributions to the development of our society. In this respect, people who live after him may evaluate him more scientifically by comparing vertically and horizontally. A compelling example is that the laws of motion was once regarded as a general principle that suitable to large part of the physical world, however its limitation was proved by the theory of reality. Ever since that, the authoritative place of Newton in physics has been shaken by Enstein [Einstein!:@], and also the evaluation of him has been corrected. Furthermore, in fact, there is a long period of time between a theory coming into being and its application to human society, so its true value may not keep a pace with the theory. It is when the theory of relativity applied to modern science and technology, including cosmology and space travel that people know the true value of Enstein and his theory. And just imagine that as the development of scientific technology, his theory may put into use in a much larger scale, at that time, people may modify the evaluation of him, and vice versa.

Although the evaluation of one's contemporaries often tends to be unfair, it is meaningful to put some emphasis on it, for it testified the influence of one’s theories, works, or activities. We will not take too far to see an example of Aristotle. Despite that he made some mistake in his methods and doctrines which may mislead people's mind, his thought deeply impact the people who live in his time and it help to shape the value and common sense in his time. By making reference to the past evaluation which made by their contemporaries, we may truly apprehend the greatness of him in his period.

To sum up, I have to admit that the evaluation of people who lived after the great persons tend to be more objective, for their contribution to human society may be not fully understand by their contemporaries, however, we should not dismiss the evaluation of their contemporaries, for it impart us the certain person’s influence of his society..

一般However后面才是真正要表达的意见，你的侧重点是不是应该调一调？

如果我来写我就写成完全赞成，然后采用case by case举例策略，将抽象题目具体化。
b1 可以philosophically分析一下contemporary怎么就limited by their cognitional capability. （当然这个b也可以不要）
b2 艺术领域 （你已经有了）
b3 科学领域 （你已经有了）
b4 政治领域

一家之言，不当之处还请赐教！:lol 第2砖！