issue 157 （7月超高频）,本人的第6篇，大家多提意见!

polymathUID：179557

157."There is no such thing as purely objective observation. All observation is subjective; it is always guided by the observer's expectations or desires." 纯粹客观的观察是不存在的。所有的观察都是主观的；它总是被观察者的期望或意愿所左右。（习作6，2005/07/24） ☆☆☆

The statement actually raises two claims here: (1) that purely objective observation does not exists,and(2)all observation is subjective due to the observer's expectations or desires. Although ample empirical evidence suggests the first claim,I find this assertion problematic in two respects.First,it assumes that all observation is guided by personal expectations or desires rather than based on a scientific or objective way.Second,it assumes that any thing recognized as truth is actually a falsehood and we cannot truly know anying.

To begin with, the statement actually insofar has some merits for contending that no such obversation exists in the form of pure objective description.As a matter of fact,there is no absolute criterion for evaluating objectivity since every conclusion is drawn by ourself, human beings. No matter how "objective" it is claimed, there always lies some subjective elements in his or her emotion. For example, when appreciating certain masterpiece such as “the Smile of Mona Lisa”,some people think the beauty lie in his charming eyes, while others
argue that Mona Lisa’ expression attracted most.Next, even such absolute criterion of objectivity is decided,under different circumstances-varied times, places,aims-or alike, what expected objective observation always brings one error or two.For instance, many observers over the world have claimed that they saw UFO or other surreptitious sights at least once, however, the majority of these observations turned out to be fictive because those observers failed to provide enough evidence for proving what they said.

Furthermore,adding all blames to the observer's expectations or desires is unfairly for interpretating the cause and accordingly obeys the essence of objectivity. First, it is crucial to distinguish observation process and observation result before formulating the final generaion. Common sence tells us,observation process and observation result are completely two different matters.The former as a searching effort for the solution to some specific problems is always taken out objectively ,while the latter including uncertain factors such as the interpretating means of the reporter often looks subjective.Secondly,with the development of science and technology, observation are not necessarily carried out by human beings since there are many "auto-observers" can handle the job as well.A fitting example of which is electrical-camera uesd in “one hundred dash”. The auto-probe sends back the data it observed then computers had the data analysed and displayed the result precisely almost at the same time.How can you deny this process is indeed an objective observation excluded with human’s desire?Thirdly,science is the objective rules of the nature and its progresses all are achieved through people’s hard work.If all obversations are not objective,it will not conduce to the development of science and our society as a result cannot see any real progress.

However, emphasizing objective observation does not mean it absolutely refuse observers’expectations or desires to participate in the observation activity. Consider, if we do not abide by this law, what the world will eventually like? -----Certainly it will turn out to be a turbid, chaotic world, no truth, no reality. Webster gives us a good definition about objective, which means expressing or dealing with facts or conditions as perceived without distortion by personal feelings, prejudices, or interpretations.Yes, if Watt did not observe the boiling tea-pot objectively, he could not made fundamental improvements in the steam engine which resulted in the modern, high-pressure steam engine patented in 1769 and accelerated the process of the Industrial Revolution; Also if there was no objective observation, Faraday could never discover electromagneic induction(1983) and propos the field theory later developed by Maxwell and Einstein.

To conclude, it is unnecessary for us to consider that objective observation and people’s subjective expectations or desires as a dilemma. While we go on some observations, we should combine objective laws as well as our helpful expectations.(614)


也欢迎互拍下列文章!:handshake
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=305082
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=304874
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=302487
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=302834
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=303340

[ Last edited by polymath on 2005-7-30 at 16:52 ]

polymathUID：179557

自己先顶!免得它沉了!好不容易写出来!大家给给意见!:)
坚持!朝第7篇努力!:victory:

polymathUID：179557

自己再顶!:victory:

顶到有人改为止!偶都帮人改了好几篇了!斑竹救命呀!:handshake

anitazyUID：146087

157."There is no such thing as purely objective observation. All observation is subjective; it is always guided by the observer's expectations or desires." 纯粹客观的观察是不存在的。所有的观察都是主观的；它总是被观察者的期望或意愿所左右。（习作6，2005/07/24） ☆☆☆

The statement actually raises two claims here: (1) that purely objective observation does not exists, and(2)all observation is subjective due to the observer's expectations or desires. Although ample empirical evidence suggests the first claim, I find this assertion problematic in two respects. First, it assumes that all observation is guided by personal expectations or desires 这里最好不要总是重复题目的词，换一个，比如inclination什么的 rather than based on a scientific or objective way. Second, it assumes that any thing recognized as truth is actually a falsehood and we cannot truly know anying we cannot recognize everything completely. 这样说或许好些.
这种开头在北美范文里见过，有点类似argument，据说不建议使用，不知道是不是真的。标点后面记得加空格。
To begin with, the statement actually insofar has some merits for contending that no such obversation observation exists in the form of pure objective description. 这句话能看懂，但是就是感觉很别扭，我一时还没想好怎么改，先放这 As a matter of fact, there is no absolute criterion 这个词好像是带有评论性的标准吧，换成 standard吧 forwhen， 或者改成to evaluate evaluating objectivity ， since every conclusion is drawn by ourself ourselves, human beings. No matter how "objective" it is claimed, there always lies some subjective elements in his or her emotion. 这句有点太汉语了，特别是no matter how. 看看这个行不行Subjective elements may always remain in one’s emotion that contravene one’s original expectation. For example, when appreciating certain a masterpiece such as “the Smile of Mona Lisa”, some people think the the 去掉 beauty lie in hisher charming eyes, while others argue that Mona Lisa’ expression attracted most. Next, Moreover even such absolute criterion of objectivity is decided, under different circumstances-varied times, places, aims-or alike, what expected objective observation always brings one error or two.这句话读着很别扭，我来重写一下吧。Moreover, even if a standard that is both objective and accurate is summarized, one may also find it difficult to evaluate distinct works when standing at respective point of view, under different circumstances, or as the vary of period and place. For instance, many observers over the world have claimed that they saw UFO or other surreptitious supernatural sights at least once, . however, the majority of these observations turned out to be fictive because those observers failed to provide enough evidence for proving what they said. However, most of these sights are proved to be normal views caused by meteor, radial, etc.

Furthermore, adding all blames to the observer's expectations or desires is unfairly for interpretating the cause and accordingly obeys the essence of objectivity. Furthermore, it is unfair to consider … to be … 。 这个句子想说什么我没太看懂，按照汉语逻辑似乎能滤出个大概。 First, Firstly, it is crucial to distinguish observation process and observation result before formulating the final generaion. before we come to the conclusion safely Common sence sense tells us, observation process and observation result are completely two different matters. It can tell from common sense that the two aspects above are different fundamentally. The former as a searching effort ? for the solution to some specific problems is always taken out objectively, while the latter including uncertain factors such as the interpretating interpretation means of the reporter often looks subjective. Secondly, with the development of science and technology, 呵呵，这句话已经被广大考生用的烂得不行了，我被人建议过摒弃这种话。 observation are not necessarily carried out by human beings are not carried out by people only, since there are many "auto-observers" that can handle the job as well. A fitting example of which this is electrical-camera 加 an 或者加 s which is uesd in “one hundred dash”. The auto-probe sends back the data it observed sends the observed data back then computers had 统一时态 have the data analysed analyzed and displayed display the result precisely almost at the same time. How can you deny this process is indeed an objective observation excluded with human’s desire? ? Thirdly, science is the an objective rules of the nature and its progresses all are achieved through people’s hard work. If all obversations spelling error are not objective ly, it will not conduce to the development of science and our society as a result cannot see 换个什么词呢？ any real progress.
However, emphasizing objective observation does not mean it absolutely refuse observers’ expectations or desires to participate in the observation activity. 后半句调换一下顺序 Consider, *过于口语化了 if we do not abide by this law, what the world will eventually like? ----- 强烈建议少用其他标点符号，因为我们不是native speaker，经常用不明白 Certainly it will turn out to be a turbid, chaotic world, no truth, no reality. *同上 Webster gives us a good definition about objective, which it means expressing or dealing with facts or conditions as perceived without distortion by personal feelings, prejudices, or interpretations. Yes *同上, if Watt did not observe the boiling tea-pot objectively, he could not made fundamental improvements in the steam engine which resulted in the modern, high-pressure steam engine patented in 1769 and accelerated the process of the Industrial Revolution; Also if there was no objective observation, Faraday could never discover electromagneic induction(1983) and propos the field theory later developed by Maxwell and Einstein.

To conclude, it is unnecessary for us to consider that objective observation and people’s subjective expectations or desires as a dilemma. While we go on some observations, we should combine objective laws as well as our helpful expectations. (614)
这个结尾好像是个模版吧，在这里用不太合适，这个结尾太草率了，而且没有体现出论点


Overall, 总结一下这篇文章，首先最严重的是句子的结构，特别是长句子，不能按照汉语的语序和结构写，建议看一下长难句什么的，找一找写句子特别是长句子的感觉。另外是词汇，这个问题大家都有，有些地方用词不当。还有就是关于 an, a, the, 和复数的用法问题，时态的统一，单词的拼写，形容词副词词性的区别，动词名词的拼写（s还是z）,标点的应用，句子的语法等等在文中都需要注意。在写G文中不能出现太口语化的词汇，这是十分重要的，尽量减少I, you, we 这样的词，以使文章显得更加formal。减少使用反问句，和否定形式，适当增加被动语态。其次总结一下文章结构，总的来说这篇文章的结构类似argument,在行文时尤其需要小心和注意，弄错结构问题严重噢^0^，还有结尾有问题，没有体现论点。
那个……偶这是第一次帮人改文，再加上偶的文也很烂，有什么不对的地方还望多多包涵，好像拍得狠了点，不要生气噢！嘻嘻

anitazyUID：146087

If all  observation is not objectively, it will not conduce to the development of science and our society as a result cannot see我觉得see可以啊!achieve 行不行，觉得see有点过于简单了，嘻嘻 any real progress.

However, emphasizing objective observation does not mean it absolutely refuse observers’ expectations or desires that usually participate in the observation activity. Just One may 我还是不建议用just imagine what the world will eventually like be if we do not abide by this law.

关于开头的问题，我觉得点题是必要的，但是不要在开头再重复使用同一个词，这样会让ETS猪觉得词汇少，其实写作的时候很需要大量的同义词和近义词，多多使用会觉得文章生动很多噢。
其实我觉得，这篇文章最大的问题是，我越读越像是argument，你看首段提出批评的对象，两个问题，然后逐段批驳，倒数第二段两相比较，最后总结，再次指出存在问题。一个结构严谨的argument出现了！楼主可一定要注意这个问题，千万不能把issue和argument的结构混淆了。看着危危险险的
嘻嘻，大家互相提高嘛，我们离考试还有很多时间噢！一个月可以做很多事情的！一起加油吧！:lol