issue130 写的很郁闷，G89组DI作业，来拍拍~~

liulin12369UID：2112878

130. How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society.

I fundamentally agree with the speaker that the means of children’s socialization determines the destiny of society and the current children education is not efficient for the following analysis.

First of all, children, who cannot avoid being socialized today, play a significant role in the future of a society just like fresh blood infused into a vein. The childhood education lays impact on the behavior of the social members. When Albert Einstein was very young, his uncle gave him a book of triangle and it triggered his interesting in geometry. He was quite curious about how to acquire the length of the third rim when the other two are known in a right-angled triangle. This childhood curiosity about math leads him to success in academy. Another example, the education received in Helen Keller’s childhood almost renewed her life. Several years later, she grew up as a successful educator. Otherwise, all the conception and view of adults are derived from the previous input. Notions are always updating during the growing of an adult. Different conceptions prevail along with times changing.

However, the actuality of our children is of little reassurance. Kids are sent to school and cooperate with classmate and fiends. School regulation and establishment may set up as a wall resisting to the outward disadvantages. We could also forbid kids to go to some certain place such as net bar or saloon in order to prevent the children from violence, freak-out, sexual misdeed and intemperance. Most people remember how often they are warned not to do several of things, however, they did not abide the rules for long, instead, they started break the chains and seek the real experience which is not allowed. The first time to kindle the cigarettes or the first time fight is so attractive that one could not retrain himself or herself. The increasing number of teenage mothers and the youth criminals reveal the failure of our current education about children’s socialization. One may ask: how could we isolate our children from the dangerous society?

The answer is unavailable, for children could not live in vacuum and the correlation between other persons is quite necessary, therefore I could conclude that the only means to raise the children is to give them some latitude to acquire the experience which they are engaged in seeking. We could tell children what is right or wrong, and persuade them not to go across the ethic line. In so far as the wrong path they will choose, the educators should show him or her the subsequence and instill the moral conception rather than blame the misdeed and regulate children with authority. Sometimes a concrete lecture is more efficient than hundreds of warnings. For example, when a young child is told the fire is hot and it is not allowed to touch fire, he or she may nod at that time of this warning and plan to have a try at another time. A wise approach to teach this kid is put his or her hand near the fire then the hot sense will bear in his or her mind.

In conclusion, children are open to the complex society and their curious and innocent nature decides the risk during getting in touch to the external world. The best way to raise children is to imbue the advices in their daily lives. Meanwhile, advices will be more powerful when combined with experience.（598）
提纲
完全同意，并提出解决方法
1，确实孩子的教育决定了孩子一生，孩子影响了社会命运
2，现状不容乐观，我们确实没有好的方法教育孩子。社会化的后果带来孩子受到不良影响
3，我们应该如何教会孩子按我们正确的路去走

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-8-3 at 00:35 ]

polymathUID：179557

我来拍吧！:):victory:

liulin12369UID：2112878

还没拍，花都谢了~！！

polymathUID：179557

为了方便建议，帮米加个题目的翻译，新东方的！呵呵！:)


130. How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society.
如何使孩子们适应社会生活决定了整个社会的命运。遗憾的是，我们还不知道如何培养孩子们从而使他们能创造出一个更好的社会。

I fundamentally agree with the speaker that the means of children’s socialization 同题，这个 socialization 有歧义，建议换个词或说法。或者直接照写题目determines the destiny of society and the current children education is not efficient for the following analysis.总体感觉开头段略显单薄，该说的话没有展开！不明不白的！在I fundamentally之前最好加一个引论部分，一句话就行啊！

First of all, children, who cannot avoid being socialized today, play a significant role in the future of a society just like fresh blood infused into a vein觉得你的比喻不太fit!孩子们是创造美好未来的主力军，不仅仅是带来一点新的改变。. The childhood education lays impact on the behavior of the social members. When Albert Einstein was very young, his uncle gave him a book of ontriangle and it+finally更生动，显得有文采！ triggered his interesting in geometry. He指代不明，可以用Little  Einstein was quite curious about how to acquire the length of the third rim when the other two are known in a right-angled triangle. This childhood curiosity about math leads him to success in academy.这个例子从那个角度能说明它上面的观点？？ Another example, the education received in Helen Keller’s childhood almost renewed her life. Several years later, she grew up as a successful educator. Otherwise, all the conception and view of adults are derived from the previous input.这句话是论点吗？ Notions are always updating during the growing of an adult. Different conceptions prevail along with times changing.总体来说，第一句提出了一个论点，但后面的2个例子证明的又不是这个观点，最后2句话好像又在说成人的思想和观念都是和早期投入分不开的！不明白你究竟在说什么？如果把all the conception and view of adults are derived from the previous input改改放在top sentence中就好了？

However, the actuality actual stateof our children is of little reassurance. Kids are sent to school and cooperate with their newclassmates and fiends. friendsSchool regulation and establishment may set up as a wall resisting to the outward disadvantages. We could also forbid kids to go to some certain place such as net bar or saloon in order to prevent the children from violence, freak-out, sexual misdeed and intemperance. Most people stillremember how oftenhow often用的不太好！强调次数很多，直接在结尾加again and again. they are warned not to do several of thingsagain and again, however, they did not abide the rules for long, instead, they started breaking the chains and seeking the real experience which is not allowed. The first time to kindle the cigarettes or the first time offighting is so attractive that one could not retrain himself or herself. The increasing numbers of teenage-mothers and the youth criminals reveal the failure of our current education about children’s socialization. One may ask: how could we isolate our children from the dangerous 这个词严重了哦！complexsociety?本段着重论述了我们现实社会对于儿童如何适应社会生活很失败！论点鲜明，论述的还不错！注意有些语法和句子相互的衔接，以及个别词的用法！:)

The positiveanswer is unavailable, for children could not live in vacuum and the correlation between other persons is quite necessary, therefore I could conclude that the only means to raise the children is to give them some latitude to acquire the experience which they are engaged in seeking. 这个句子思想高度蛮高的！赞！再修改一下！We could tell children what is right or wrong, and persuade them not to go across overpassthe ethic line. In so far as去掉  the wrong path they will choosesome children accidentally choose the wrong path, the educators should show him or her the terriblesubsequence and instill the moral conception rather than blame the misdeeds and regulate children with authority. Sometimes a concrete lecture is more efficient than hundreds of warnings. For example, when a young child is told the fire is hot  用dangerous更好呀！and it is not allowed to touch fire, he or she may nod at that time of this warning and plan tohave some curiosites to have a try at another time. A wise approachway to teach this kid is put his or her hand near the fire then the hot sense will bear in his or her mind麻烦你再修改一下！呵呵！. 这一段紧接上段回答了培养孩子适应社会生活的好方法。写的不错！注意小错误！:)

In conclusion, children are open to the complex society and their curiouscuriosities and innocent nature decides去掉s the risk during getting in touch to the external world. The best way to raise children is to imbue givethe advices in their daily lives. Meanwhile, advices will be more powerful when combined with experience.（598）

加油哦！还不错！文章没跑题！写得也很好！注意我给你指出的错误！昨晚开始写的是这样吗？一惊一乍的！呵呵！:victory: