揭秘托福GRE作文电子评分器-元月20日晚公开课习作收集帖

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考虑到部分同学可能手头上没有习作，这里出一道托福大作文题，请花20分钟写一篇出来贴在这里。
Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.

时间：元月20日星期三晚7点半
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When it comes to the quality of learning, I think it is the degree the students master the knowledge which specific level of education requires. With this definition, I fundamentally disagree with the claim that all levels of education are limited by competition. Because different level education has different goals, in my opinion, when learning mostly involves memorizing facts,  appropriate competition for high grades could be an approach to improve the quality of learning, but overemphasizing grades does the opposite, when the purpose of education is comprehension of knowledge and innovation, pursuing high scores can hardly be meaning.

Competition for high scores a method for promoting the quality of learning when it comes to mechanical memorizing. Imagine there is a factory holds a knowledge contest of safety rules which are boring to learn, workers with the highest scores win the contest which has a reward. Workers who win the contest must have mastered the safety rules very well and workers in the contest, through competition for high scores, effectively master the safety rules and apply them in the contest, even in their daily working. In this case, a contest with competition for scores is helpful for improving the quality of learning boring safety rules. And the same is true of junior high school students and below, which their studying mostly involves memorizing the basic facts and formulations, competing for scores could be beneficial to master the basic knowledge which will be the foundation of their future studying.




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<error_type> sentence fragment </error_type>
<incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有sentence fragment错误的句子 放在这里</incorrect>

<error_type> run-on sentence </error_type>
<incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有run-on sentence错误的句子 放在这里</incorrect>


<error_type> subject-verb agreement </error_type>
<incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有subject-verb agreement错误的句子 放在这里</incorrect>  

<error_type> there be miscontruction </error_type>
<seemingly_incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有there be miscontruction错误的句子 放在这里</seemingly_incorrect>  


<error_type> word form </error_type>
<seemingly_incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有sentence fragment错误的句子 放在这里</seemingly_incorrect>  

  

<error_type> verb noun collocation error</error type>
<seemingly_incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有verb noun collocation error错误的句子 放在这里</seemingly_incorrect>
<collocation_error> 这里填上面句子里的动词和名词原型 如 solve problem</collocation_error>
<COCA_search_term>填上你在COCA里的查找项</COCA_search_term>
<corrected_collocation>这里填上根据COCA查询结果修改后的动词和名词原型</corrected_collocation>


<error_type> adjective noun collocation error</error type>
<seemingly_incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有adjective noun collocation error错误的句子 放在这里</seemingly_incorrect>
<collocation_error>  这里填上上面句子里的形容词和名词 如 difficult problem</collocation_error>  
<COCA_search_term>填上你在COCA里的查找项</COCA_search_term>  
<corrected_collocation>这里填上根据COCA查询结果修改后的形容词和名词</corrected_collocation>

<error_type> verb adv collocation error</error type>
<seemingly_incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有veb adv collocation error错误的句子 放在这里</seemingly_incorrect>
<collocation_error> 这里填上上面句子里的动词和副词 如 difficult problem</collocation_error>
<COCA_search_term>填上你在COCA里的查找项</COCA_search_term>  
<corrected_collocation>这里填上根据COCA查询结果修改后的动词和副词</corrected_collocation>  


<error_type> verb preposition collocation error</error type>
<seemingly_incorrect>请找出自己习作中含有veb preposition collocation error错误的句子 放在这里</seemingly_incorrect>
<collocation_error> 这里填上上面句子里的动词和介词 如 run in</collocation_error>
<COCA_search_term>填上你在COCA里的查找项</COCA_search_term>  
<corrected_collocation>这里填上根据COCA查询结果修改后的动词和介词</corrected_collocation>  

anqixiaoUID：3864559

本人授权寄托ID anqixiao持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID：anqixiao

GRE ISSUE: People who are the most deeply committed to an idea or policy are also the most critical of it. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

It is argued that people who are the most deeply committed to an idea or policy are also the most critical of it. Considering that critical thinking skills is one of the cornerstones upon which science is grounded, I concede that the speaker’s assertion accord with the observation that perfectionists sometimes could be the fiercest critics of their own ideas and products, while remaining steadfast to the improvement and advancement thereof.  However, on balance, I disagree with this assertion, for it is an unfair generalization that overlooks many other cases, such as that of the concentration camp prisoners.

Indeed, in engineering and science, perseverance and self-criticism are two imperative ingredients whose synergic power has propelled the advancement of modern technology. One has to put aside his/her pride and ego in the quest of truth and transcendency. One of the most influential and lionized innovators of the 21st century, Steve Jobs was also a notorious perfectionist. During the development of the desktop computer, Macintosh, he remained so unrelentingly critical of the product, obsessively mulling over its every detail, that the product’s release was postponed for five years. Detractors might argue that undue self-criticism and search for perfection is a futile non-starter – for its unattainable nature. They might also argue that this obsession is pathological to some extent and should not be championed for by society, as it definitely had fostered detrimental amounts of stress in Jobs, which may have precipitated his bemoaned early death. While there are some merits to these arguments, the fact that Jobs’ commitment and his critical eye for any project coexisted during the course of his career is not to undermined. Neither of them should be downplayed in attributing all the admiration from the public he commanded as well as the inspiring milestones Apple arrived at under his reign.

Nonetheless, criticism, which requires detached scrutiny over the situation, does not always come hand in hand with commitment. The case of the prisoners in Nazi concentration camps, as recounted by Viktor Frankl in “Meaning of Life”, demonstrates the point. Trapped in extremities and tortured by inhumanities, prisoners only had two choices – they could either give up, kill themselves and end the meaningless sufferings on the spot or live on and accept the sufferings somehow. It was clear that the chance for any prisoner to walk out of the concentration camp was abysmally dim. Were all the prisoners who made the latter choice so illogical? The striking commonality among the survivors pointed us to look in another direction: though disparate, they all found reasons, that is, meaning, for stomaching the sufferings. As Nietzsche elegantly put, “he who has found a why to live for can bear almost any how.” It was not that the prisoners that chose to bear the sufferings were illogical – they found reasons to justify their choice – but the situation called for unquestioning faith that was incompatible with undue self-doubt and criticism that would have surfaced with hardheaded analyses.

To sum up, while in areas such as engineering and science, both perseverance and self-criticism have often turned out to be the indispensable ingredients amounting to excellence, the speaker’s claim do not square with observations arising from areas outside of the science community. Sometimes, as proven by the Nazi concentration camp survivors, on top of perseverance, the “irrational” unconditional faith is just as useful as the detached, scientifically valued self-criticism.

lionfireUID：3654238

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。
寄托ID：wavedzl
习作类型：托福独立作文
题目：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Nowadays, neighbors depend on each other less than people in the past.

There is a fierce debate that some people believe that university students should attend classes if they select to go into the university, on the contrary, others argue that whether to attend the classes is an optional depending on arrangement the students make. From my point of view, students should be required to attend classes on force like many teachers do nowadays: check the attendance.
Some reasons to support my opinion. First of all, teachers not only go through the lecture materials in the class, but also they share their own experience which we can’t find in the book if students want to learn by themselves off the class. In the second place, you can’t imagine how attractive your classmates come out a good idea and discuss with you which is the best way to learn and promote. Thirdly, especially as for some academic courses, we should take more time and energy on it if we were absent from class. It leads to wasting time and not learning well eventually.
Students should manage their time properly with the limited time on campus. It is necessary for everyone to attend all the classes they choose and listen to the teacher carefully in order to a bright future.
来自UID为：3687506的同学

天天寻宝AclockUID：3687506

天天寻宝Aclock 发表于 2016-1-20 20:37
"本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄 ...

Practice makes perfect! Full of energy, love, keep moving on.

天天寻宝AclockUID：3687506

"本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID：3687506"

天天寻宝AclockUID：3687506

Practice makes perfect! Full of energy, love, keep moving on.

who-knowsUID：3399600

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。
寄托ID：who_knows

习作类型：托福独立作文
题目：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Nowadays, neighbors depend on each other less than people in the past.

Not only once have I bumped into people next door waiting for the elevator, nodded to each other and felt embarrassed all the way home. Not only am I introverted but nowadays people tend to live on their own. We boast a less friendly and cordial neighborhood than in the past.
With the advancement of technology it is not as efficient to ask neighbors for help as yesterday. Telephones have made it more convenient to communicate with distant people. In pre-wire period, we asked technicians nearby to repair our broken devices while we call the related company to send an engineer nowadays. We chatted with neighbors face-to-face in the past and now daily interactions are carried out by telecommunications. A lack of communications have made neighbors acquaintances or even strangers.
Subjectively, people are less willing to expose themselves to the unfamiliar. Virtual technology may contribute to it, but emotionally, people don't want to show their weakness. We are facing fierce competitions nowadays and we can't endure others being in a better-off position. When we encounter people in the neighborhood, we start with 'Hello' and end up talking about weather. The problems we are dealing with are not options for topic. By assuming a smile we are rejecting encouragements and favors. We are saying it's fine and that I can handle it.
Yet a neighborhood filled with an atmosphere of nonchalance and social etiquette is not the one we really embrace. It leads to distrust in society. Attitudes influence behavior. We are in the worsening cycle of independence until the individual life collapses under its own weight. Since teamwork is exhorted in workplace, inter-dependence is required in the neighborhood.
Traditionally we live a life of helping each other, while distance limits our interaction range. Technology have abridged the physical obstacle but it's up to us to become emotionally connected.

qq135zxcUID：2655142

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID：
托福作文：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The way a person dresses reflects his/her characters.（历年试题 2011-05-28 独立写作）

There is a common saying that do not judge people by their appearances. Undeniably, outward looks can never be the only criterion on which to evaluate a person. When it comes to the question that does the way a person dresses reflect his/her own characters, people’s perspective vary from person to person. Some claim that a person’s dressing style can indicate his/her personality. However, from my perspective, I found myself in the concord with the inclination that the way people dress might be an indication of his/her character, although it can never be the best indicator.

Admittedly, to some extent, a person’s characters can not be determined only by his dressing, such as this person’s wealth, personality and so on. Because we can not safely draw a conclusion this person is pretty good only referring his appearance or wearing. And there are other factors contributing to judge a person’s characters: behavior and manners, which are more reliable ways to know a person’s real character. Thus, we should attach our focus on his or her behavior or attitude, instead of their outward appearance.

In fact, one’s dressing styles reveal his or her personal preferences, which are closely associated with their personality. For instance, if a person often wear some casual clothing in daily life, like T-shirt, jeans, or sportswear, he or she might be keen on to the enjoyment of a casual and relaxing way of living and physical activities. Thus, there exists one possibility that this person maybe out-going and open-minded. Contrary to this, if one wears formal clothes most time like suits, he or she might be a businessman and might take things really careful. Beside, if a man prefers to wear bright-colored clothes, he might be very extrovert. On the other hand, if a man choose dark clothes, he might has an introvert personality.

Furthermore, from a person’s dressing style, it can also offer us some clues of this person’s character. And there is an example well demonstrated this point. As we all know, we should dress ourselves suitably according to different situations. That is to say, when we attend a dancing party, we should wear evening dress which is suitable in this occasion. While in a graduate ceremony we need to dress special graduate clothes instead of casual T-shirt. And if a man always wears wrong clothes on those special occasions, he might be very careless in daily life. In addition, if a person wears out-dated clothes frequently, we might say this person does not have a good taste and might not be easy to accept new things.

To sum up, from my illustration we know that a person’s character should be determined from various aspects, like appearances, behaviors and attitude, but his/her dressing style could be a sign of his/her preferences and individual personality. Therefore, the clothes one choose to wear is actually under an individual consideration which includes their personal inclination and preference, and we can get some information about their characters

cyanchowUID：3617646

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。
- 寄托ID：cyanchow
When it comes to the quality of learning, I think it is the degree the students master the knowledge which specific level of education requires. With this definition, I fundamentally disagree with the claim that all levels of education are limited by competition. Because different level education has different goals, in my opinion, when learning mostly involves memorizing facts,  appropriate competition for high grades could be an approach to improve the quality of learning, but overemphasizing grades does the opposite, when the purpose of education is comprehension of knowledge and innovation, pursuing high scores can hardly be meaning.

Competition for high scores a method for promoting the quality of learning when it comes to mechanical memorizing. Imagine there is a factory holds a knowledge contest of safety rules which are boring to learn, workers with the highest scores win the contest which has a reward. Workers who win the contest must have mastered the safety rules very well and workers in the contest, through competition for high scores, effectively master the safety rules and apply them in the contest, even in their daily working. In this case, a contest with competition for scores is helpful for improving the quality of learning boring safety rules. And the same is true of junior high school students and below, which their studying mostly involves memorizing the basic facts and formulations, competing for scores could be beneficial to master the basic knowledge which will be the foundation of their future studying.

木婴UID：3589207

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID
GRE argument
题目
25. The following was written as a part of an application for a small-business loan by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.
"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, the proposed new jazz club in Monroe, the C-Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popular in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's annual jazz festival last summer; several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe; and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight at 7 P.M. Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

正文
This application thinks that a jazz music club, called C-Note, will bring a great profitable in Monroe, because it lacks of competition, many people like jazz music in Monroe and typical jazz fans were generous to this entertainment. However, it ignores some specific evidences. It should provide more information about that C-Note will be not threatened by the nearest jazz club, jazz music is popular in Monroe and the nationwide study is the same as ‘Monroewide’ study.

Firstly, this application need provide more information about that C-Note will not have any competition with the nearest jazz club. It is probably that 65 miles highway which connected C-Note and its nearest jazz club. People get there conveniently. On the other hand, the nearest jazz club maybe the most famous club in the world. C-Note has no chance to challenge it position. People would rather spend time to the nearest club than go to C-Note. Therefore this application should provide the evidence that the nearest jazz club is not better than C-Note.

Secondly，the evidence is also not enough to prove jazz music is popular in Monroe. Although annual jazz festival attracted many people attended in Monroe’s last summer, we cannot learn many people attended this festival every year. It is probably that jazz festival of last summer is very special and a lot of performances were never seen before. The fresh shows attracted them rather than jazz festival itself. On the other hand, the application should provide the reasons of the jazz musicians living in Monroe. If not, we may think that jazz musicians were attracted by the unrelated jazz factors. For example, the sun is shining brightly and the people are very kind. At the same time，the application should tell us that there is a direct connection between people like “Jazz Nightly” and people would go jazz club. If not, we may think that people just like listening the jazz radio program, but they do not like jazz club. At last, the information is too small to judge that the jazz music is popular in Monroe.

Thirdly, the application should tell us the typic jazz fan is also generous to the jazz club in Monroe. Jazz entertainment has many forms like listening the radio, going to jazz festivel, buying CDs and so on. Typic jazz fans could spend much money on other forms rather than jazz club. On the other hand, nationwide study cannot represent Monroe wide study unless Monroe samples are similar to the nationwide samples. We need the information about the exact nationwide samples and Monroe samples, and then we could realise whether nationwide study has the persvation to represent the Monroe jazz fans.

At last, this application need provide the evidence above to prove the C-Note club will bring a great profit or not

kingdomyiUID：2747900

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID：kingdomyi

Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.  


For most classes, attendances should be valued, especially some basic classes. It doesn’t mean that the self-study is forbidden, but attending classes is recommended for freshmen and sophomores. For their very first time coming into university, they might not have a proper and comprehensive understanding between college and high school life, thus they seemed be struggle to orient the new surroundings and feeling difficult to study. Therefore, joining the class’s lecture and following the professor’s guide might be suitable for most of freshmen and sophomores.
However, students should have be free to master their own time and took the classes of their own accord in the junior or senior years. After two or three years spending in school, they might develop some special patterns or discover some unusually timetable. At that case, attending classes might be not appropriated for them
Least but not the last, since there is not any eternal truth, I recommended university students found their own way to benefit themselves.

双料少年UID：3635126

When it comes to the quality of learning, I think it is the degree the students master the knowledge which specific level of education requires. With this definition, I fundamentally disagree with the claim that all levels of education are limited by competition. Because different level education has different goals, in my opinion, when learning mostly involves memorizing facts,  appropriate competition for high grades could be an approach to improve the quality of learning, but overemphasizing grades does the opposite, when the purpose of education is comprehension of knowledge and innovation, pursuing high scores can hardly be meaning. Competition for high scores a method for promoting the quality of learning when it comes to mechanical memorizing. Imagine there is a factory holds a knowledge contest of safety rules which are boring to learn, workers with the highest scores win the contest which has a reward. Workers who win the contest must have mastered the safety rules very well and workers in the contest, through competition for high scores, effectively master the safety rules and apply them in the contest, even in their daily working. In this case, a contest with competition for scores is helpful for improving the quality of learning boring safety rules. And the same is true of junior high school students and below, which their studying mostly involves memorizing the basic facts and formulations, competing for scores could be beneficial to master the basic knowledge which will be the foundation of their future studying.

chinnie1952UID：3687558

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID：


When it comes to the quality of learning, I think it is the degree the students master the knowledge which specific level of education requires. With this definition, I fundamentally disagree with the claim that all levels of education are limited by competition. Because different level education has different goals, in my opinion, when learning mostly involves memorizing facts,  appropriate competition for high grades could be an approach to improve the quality of learning, but overemphasizing grades does the opposite, when the purpose of education is comprehension of knowledge and innovation, pursuing high scores can hardly be meaning.

Competition for high scores a method for promoting the quality of learning when it comes to mechanical memorizing. Imagine there is a factory holds a knowledge contest of safety rules which are boring to learn, workers with the highest scores win the contest which has a reward. Workers who win the contest must have mastered the safety rules very well and workers in the contest, through competition for high scores, effectively master the safety rules and apply them in the contest, even in their daily working. In this case, a contest with competition for scores is helpful for improving the quality of learning boring safety rules. And the same is true of junior high school students and below, which their studying mostly involves memorizing the basic facts and formulations, competing for scores could be beneficial to master the basic knowledge which will be the foundation of their future studying.

448986290UID：2880024

本人授权寄托ID tesolchina持有人使用本人的习作及参加本次寄托公开课的练习答案作为科研、教学用途。 - 寄托ID：448986290

Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.