ISSUE6 【越洋农场】三周慢组作业

huhu_zsuUID: 2183490

修改发贴格式。这篇被我移走了。

[ 本帖最后由 huhu_zsu 于 2006-6-25 10:23 编辑 ]

huhu_zsuUID: 2183490

同样。移位。argument2
连接：
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

[ 本帖最后由 huhu_zsu 于 2006-6-25 08:50 编辑 ]

huhu_zsuUID: 2183490

Issue6
words:661.
用时：1小时，修改：2小时

6、"The most effective way to understand contemporary culture is to analyze the trends of its youth."

Do the trends of youth stand for the contemporary culture? Although I agree that analyzing the trends of youth is an effective way to understand contemporary culture, the statement fails to account for the trait of youth’s trends which lead them unconvincing in some cases. In addition, other social members’ contribution to the shape of contemporary culture can not be ignored.

I agree with the statement insofar as young people are prone to accept the up-to-date things and they are always leading the trend of the world. Once the youth are wild about some things, the whole society will pay attention to it and it is equally possible that people in other ages will take in it. What’s more, the originative spirits of youth make it much easier for them to create new culture. For example, Blog is very popular among young people in China recently. Nearly every one owns a space in the Internet where they write dairy, express their feelings and wait for others to make some comments on their works. It seems that Blog becomes an psychic homestead for the youth who long for give voice to their own views freely and take pleasure in communicate with others. Gradually, people in other ages begin to welcome this virtual space in the Internet and build their own Blog. Consequently, researchers in growing numbers of related filed pay attention to this “Blog” phenomenon on the basis that it indicates a rising culture in China.

However, we can not ignore the fact that the trends of youth are not as stable as we think, which always come quickly but leave fast. In most cases, their trends change before we are able to draw any conclusions from analyzing. A good case in point is their fanatical attitude to some fresh things. Three months ago, young people in the area where I live tend to lay a great emphasis on the digital productions. They are willing to buy any productions--from digital cameras to mobile phones -- come into the market recently. Researchers who are observed of this phenomenon may easily discover that this area is undergoing a digital storm. And some canny investors may even consider of doing some of related investment in this area to attract the youth. However, these trends just like wind blow through, leaving that many youth with mobiles phone in their pocket and MP3 hanging on their neck but nothing else. Nowadays, our youth are interested in collecting artworks since a popular TV program shows that how efficient it will be in the way to help youth become more lettered. In this case, it is very difficult for researchers who depend on analyzing the trends of the youth to study the contemporary culture since research need time but changes of trends seem not.

Further, contemporary culture of a certain area is generated by all the people of every age in the society—including wrinkly, the elderly and even children--while youth only rank a part of them. Therefore, it is not adequate to study and evaluate contemporary culture only from the trends of youth. Middle-aged persons are the major strength of our society who create most of social prosperity and wealth and whose trends are correspondingly steady. It is indispensable for us to consider of their trends. Besides, the populations of old people in many counties are increasing rapidly which may lead to the result that the population of old people is more than that of the youth. If we only analyze the trends of youth in these countries while regardless of the olds’ trends, the aftermath is entirely possible that the conclusions we made is not rounded and even it is not really the case.

To sum up, it is an efficient way for us to understand the contemporary culture by analyzing the trends of the youth. But we should not ignore other members in the society when trying to give an overall evaluation to the contemporary culture.

自评：平淡无奇，没有什么出彩的地方。尤其是结尾。
        等我再想想办法。

FrostmournUID: 2179616

The following appeared in a letter sent by a committee of homeowners from the Deerhaven Acres to all homeowners in Deerhaven Acres.
"Seven years ago, homeowners in nearby Brookville community adopted a set of restrictions on how the community's yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. Since then, average property values have tripled in Brookville. In order to raise property values in Deerhaven Acres, we should adopt our own set of restrictions on landscaping and housepainting."


In this argument, the author suggest that residents in Deerhaven Acres(DA) should adopt their own set of restrictions on landscaping and housepainting since homeowners in Brookwille community(BC) did this seven years ago and are seeing（感觉比较别扭，可以用expiriencing） their property values tripled now. Close scrutiny of each of these facts, however, reveals that none of them lend credible support to the recommendation.

In the first place, the author does not give us any evidence that homeowners in BC did adopt the set of restrictions. Common sense tells us that most people prefer decorating their home in their own way to following others’ restrictions. Therefore, it is entirely possible that many residents in BC did not landscape their yards and color the exteriors of homes as the community demanded. If this situation did happen（situation和happen能否搭配？感觉不太恰当,situation是个比较静态的东西。如果改的话case应该行吧）, then any change in BC’s property value can not be attributed to the set of restrictions. Consequently, the author can not draw any conclusion from BC’s situation nor imagine what effect homeowners in DA will obtain when they adopt similar restrictions.（这点挺独特我没有想到，我以为adopt了就是执行了）

In the second place, even assuming that residents in BC implemented the set of restriction, this argument is still not convincing as it stands due to little evidence is provided by author that the increase value of property is resulted from the restrictions. As we know, there are many factors contribute to the rising of property's value, such as need and demand of consumers, locality of the house,  the internal decoration and so forth. Without ruling out these factors and other possible reasons, the argument cannot convince me on the basis of them that the restriction is the only reason for the rising of property value, let alone that homeowners in DA should adopt their own set of restrictions on landscaping and housepainting.

In the third place, provided that the restriction was responsible for the increase in property value of BC, it is still not persuasive to assert that homeowner in DA should adopt their own set of restriction. For one thing, same measure is not necessarily effective in different places. Without supporting evidence indicate（without从句里用动词？） that the home-consumers in BC like the restrictions on landscaping and housepainting, it is so early（hasty） to advocate that this restriction will help enhance the property values. To（on） the contrary, it may exert a negative impact on the value of property. For another, a considerable period of seven years has passed since BC adopted the set of restriction, situation of demand and supply for home may be totally different. It is doubtful that this measure still works today as seven years ago.

To sum up, the argument relies on several assumptions which render it unconvincing as it stands. （我也爱这句子，呵呵）In order to bolster the recommendation, the author must provide evidence that homeowners in BC did adopt the set of restrictions and the triple value of property is due to the restrictions. To better assess the recommendation I would need more evidence --perhaps by market research--that consumers in DA like the restrictions of the home and homeowners in DA are willing to adopt the restrictions.

huhu_zsu驾驭长难句的能力好强啊，我经常写的很生硬还有动词用不好。向你学习
BTW:楼主真是交作业的模范呀！不服不行

morallreyUID: 2191298

6、"The most effective way to understand contemporary culture is to analyze the trends of its youth."

Do the trends of youth stand for the contemporary culture? Although I agree that analyzing the trends of youth is an effective way to understand contemporary culture, the statement fails to account for the trait of youth’s trends which lead them unconvincing in some cases. In addition, other social members’ contribution to the shape of contemporary culture can not be ignored.

I agree with the statement insofar as young people are prone to accept the up-to-date things and they are always leading the trend of the world. Once the youth are wild about some things, the whole society will pay attention to it and it is equally possible that people in other ages will take in it. What’s more, the originative spirits of youth make it much easier for them to create new culture. For example, Blog is very popular among young people in China recently. Nearly every one owns a space in the Internet where they write dairy（diary）, express their feelings and wait for others to make some comments on their works. It seems that Blog becomes an(a) psychic homestead for the youth who long for give (giving)voice to their own views freely and take pleasure in communicate with others. Gradually, people in other ages begin to welcome this virtual space in(on) the Internet and build their own Blog. Consequently, researchers in growing numbers of related filed (有点不明白filed 在这里做什么用)pay attention to this “Blog” phenomenon on the basis that it indicates a rising culture in China.

However, we can not ignore the fact that the trends of youth are not as stable as we think, which always come quickly but leave fast. In most cases, their trends change before we are able to draw any conclusions from analyzing. A good case in point is their fanatical attitude to some fresh things. Three months ago, young people in the area where I live tend to lay a great emphasis on the digital productions(production 不可数). They are willing to buy any productions--from digital cameras（去掉as） to mobile phones – come（coming） into the market recently. Researchers who are (have) observed of this phenomenon may easily discover that this area is undergoing a digital storm. And some canny investors may even consider of doing some of(去掉of) related investment in this area to attract the youth. However, these trends just like wind blow （blew） through, leaving that many youth with mobiles phone in their pocket and MP3 hanging on their neck but nothing else. Nowadays, our youth are interested in collecting artworks since a popular TV program shows that how efficient it will be in the way（in the way是挡道的意思吧） to help youth become more lettered. In this case, it is very difficult for researchers who depend on analyzing the trends of the youth to study the contemporary culture since research need time but changes of trends seem not.

Further, contemporary culture of a certain area is generated by all the people of every age in the society—including （the）wrinkly, the elderly and even children--while youth only rank(s) a part of them. Therefore, it is not adequate to study and evaluate contemporary culture only from the trends of youth. Middle-aged persons are the major strength of our society who create most of social prosperity and wealth and whose trends are correspondingly steady. It is indispensable for us to consider of their trends. Besides, the populations(population) of old people in many counties are increasing rapidly which may lead to the result that the population of old people is more than that of the youth. If we only analyze the trends of youth in these countries while regardless of the olds’ trends, the aftermath is entirely possible that the conclusions we made is not rounded and even it is not really the case.

To sum up, it is an efficient way for us to understand the contemporary culture by analyzing the trends of the youth. But we should not ignore other members in the society when trying to give an overall evaluation to the contemporary culture.   
楼主这篇作文遣辞造句比较精彩，像psychic homestead , give voice to,in point ,体现出作者丰富的积累